Monday, October 12, 2009

Also on Sunday, and into Monday, I met another boy online that Michael had sex with. At first it seemed it was in July. Then August 9. Finally, through Michael's credit card info it turned out to be on Tuesday, August 11, 2009. The day before I turned 35 years old, Michael payed $43.87 to fuck a 25 year old boy. He made love to me the next day and I thought it so beautiful... 2 days later, on Friday, August 14, Mark & I picked Mollie up from the bus station. On the 15th we went to the party that Michael gave me. He gave me lots of presents that I'd asked for. With the exception of Mollie (who's mine forever) I'm getting rid of all the other presents. It hurts to get rid of things I wanted, but it hurts more to keep them near me. They feel like they aren't real to me now; they're just presents that Michael gave me 4 days after paying to fuck some boy a day before my birthday. This hurts so much more than I can handle right now.

I'm stronger than this though. Michael really has changed now. I really believe that. I just have to face the past and get through it and I will. I knew it was going to be painful...but I'm stronger than all this bullshit. It will just take time. And I think I might never celebrate my birthday ever again.

For those of you who are wondering, I now know that Michael slept with 12 other men besides me during 5.5 months of dating. It would seem that this all happened between May 20, 2009 & September 7, 2009. 12 men (13 including me, the official boyfriend) in less than 4 months time. That's pretty fucking amazing. That's pretty fucking sad and cruel and disgusting. I need some midrin NOW.

I was told by several people that after having your gallbladder removed that I'd have diarrhea for a few weeks until my body adjusted. I hadn't had that at all, but it looks like the reason I'd been spared that fate (until now) was that I was on oxycodone every day for pain, and it causes constipation. Unfortunately I'm weaning myself off of that drug, and now I've had it for sevral hours. Ick. Now I'm not sure what I can and can't eat. It's annoying.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:00 AM
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