Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Since I haven't kept up with the blog this week, and I'm backtracking, expect there to be a bit of confusion. lol

On Thursday I worked. I also picked up a Doctor Who project that Bill was helping me with, but which I still haven't found the time to check out. I'd feel absolutely horrible about this, but I just helped Bill out in a big way, and I'm sure he understands the crazy business that is my life.

Friday I worked. I rented The Fountain for the first of several times over the weekend, and never watched it, though Mark did. I did watch Pan's Labyrinth though, which I thought was great. After work, one of our neighbors who's rarely seen, but always seems to me, to be hitting on me, asked Mark & I if we could drive him to his bank. He smelled like alcohol, and was so loud that he hurt Mark's ears. He kept pushing for us all to go to a bar, and said that he'd seen me at Necto a few times, but that he just doesn't go up to people. We dropped him off at his bank, and then we went home, where I stayed in most of the night. I did rent some porn later, remembering that I had some free rentals slots, and that they'd be due back on Monday, which I had off.

Saturday. I did some Bitserve stuff, which hasn't been happening of late. Mark has doing most of the work, which he says is fine, as I got him out of his slump, but the downside for me, is that the check for $400.00 I'd be getting about now, most likely will be redused to $200.00, as I simply havn't been doing much in that department. Still, I don't love the job. Most of it is fine, but I have a problem dealing with people on the phone, as in...I don't want to do it. At all. lol

I think I talked to Shane on Saturday as well. And Corey & I made plans I think. I mean...I know these plans exist now, I just don't know when I made them. lol

Sunday night I had to work a bit over as the returns sucked so bad, but that was less annoying than it could have been, as Carrie came in to visit me, which was fun. I took back the porn after work. When I got home I watched the new "Desperate Housewives" & "Brothers & Sisters"; both of which made me cry.

Somewhere within all these blurred together days (this is why I should keep up with the blog at all times!) I finished Harry Potter 5, read Trek for a few days, and decided I couldn't wait for HP6 and dived in.

Monday I had off, and slept. Then when Mark got home I went to the party store, then to visit with Adam, Carrie & Jennifer. Stopped by the video store to see Mallory, where I met Josh, who I've spoken to on the phone plenty of times. Then came home and ate, and got ready for Necto. Went to Aut Bar first, then Necto where I danced and danced some more with my friend Rachel. I had a few drinks, had a few laughs. We started calling people we know at random, which I'm not sure why that was...but we did. I started missing Corey, which is weird because we've never gone out and done anything, so it's not like I'm used to having him around on such occasions. Wacky. I left a bit early and hit Aut Bar again, where I ran into some more friends. Then headed home where I played Marvel Ultimate Alliance, ate, and read more Harry Potter. I have about 150 pages left (which means I'll most likely be finishing it tomorrow), and then I'm screwed until book 7 comes out, 66 days from now.

Lucas called me in the early Tuesday hours. He was in Chicago, driving home, having made it through another round of auditions for RENT (which have been ongoing for a considerable amount of time now), and he has high hopes that he has won the part of Mark!?! I hope he gets it. Lucas hurt me with his behavior, but we've developed an odd sort of friendship on the phone and online, which I'm glad we have. I don't count on him to be anywhere that he says he will. I don't believe him when he says he'll be somewhere, but I trust the rest of what he says. It's an odd sort of friendship I guess.

Tuesday. Slept some more. Sleep is something that I've been cherishing more as I age. Mostly because it can affect the way my stomach works - sleeplessness can mean that my acid is high, and can also mean that it will be getting worse as I've had little rest. So I never feel bad about sleeping, which I might have in the past. I've also been drinking a lot of water in the last couple of days. I was drinking a lot of dairy stuff over the last month, and my stomach didn't love it, though my taste buds did...but the water is good. I mostly drink water & cranberry juice, with a little bit of soda, a little bit of alcohol, and nothing much else.

Tonight Mark & I are seeing Hypnogaja play at the Blind Pig. I told Lucas about it when I was on the phone with him and he asked if he could come. I told him that would be fine, but I don't really expect him to be there. I probably should have told a million people about this show, but I just suck at that kind of thing. Plus, I'm not a planner. I was going to ask Corey to go, but when we made plans on Saturday it sounded like he'd be pretty busy or not have the cash or something, so I didn't. I'd ask Shane to go, but he has bad ears and doesn't like live music. I don't love live music myself (which is why I didn't attend last night's Morrisey concert), but I know these guys and I don't get to see them that often.

So Wednesday, Thursday & Friday I work. Friday night I believe I'm hanging out with Shane & then going to Necto. Saturday Corey is coming over and staying until Sunday (which I requested off for the occasion).

Also somewhere within the days in this entry, I got some more poetry written. 1 for Shane (who afterwards said that he loved it and that I really understand him, and that he's never been able to say that to anyone before!), 2 for Corey (which he liked though he found them a bit odd, and said they don't paint him in the most flattering light - though I didn't think of them that way) - so mostly positive reviews, which made me feel great. There were other random poems as well. I hope more will be written soon.

Blah. I'm doing some laundry, and I should shave and shower. I think I might skip the shaving today. I'll probably be sending Mollie's care package tomorrow; that's the plan anyways. I'm going to eat now.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:33 PM
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   Wednesday, May 16, 2007

I found I had voicemails from Corey, Mollie & Jennifer after the last entry, so I called them all back. Corey & I had a fun, if brief conversation about our plans for the week. And we talked about Stargate, which oddly enough, I knew more about than he did; at least the history of the show and the movie. I'm looking forward to spending more time with him this weekend. Mollie told me how she aced her 2nd test, only she has to retake it because everyone else failed and they put it to a vote; she's not worried about having any trouble with the next one though. She was watching "Pan's Labyrinth" when I called, and she let me go so she could finish that one. Jennifer didn't answer of course, as we keep missing each other. lol She might hang out with me Thursday night.

I played more Marvel Ultimate Alliance, then ate and visited with Mark. We just hung out in my room and chatted. I read my e-mail. I uploaded some new pictures to myspace. I got ready for the bar pretty early, but moved slower than usual when it was time to go.

Mark dropped me off at the Blind Pig a bit late. He couldn't come to the show because of the problems he has with his lungs; he avoids smokey environments if at all possible. Jason & Mark (from the band) greeted me just after I entered the bar, and asked about Mark & Mollie, and I explained why they weren't there. They both told me to say hello to Mollie for them. They're in town for a week, and want to hang out with me, so we might hang out tomorrow night, or Thursday. They want to see Spider-Man 3, get some dinner, and go to Aut Bar to drink. Sounds like it could be fun. The show was great, if short, and my cousin Phillip was there to see another band that was playing, as he knew a guy (named Justin?) who was in the band, and I got to meet him too.

After the show, I bought some Hypnogaja stuff, and talked to the guys some more. They looked exhausted, and I had more to do at home, so I said goodnight, and wandered outside, where I called Mark to let him know I was ready for my ride home. While I waited I called a dozen people, who were either asleep or just not answering. I felt like a hooker out there on the sidewalk. Mark arrived soon enough, and we headed home.

We got Mollie care package mostly ready to go (this one is kind of massive); I think she'll love it. I chatted with Shane on the phone for a bit, but I was starving so I let him go so I could eat. I went to my room and read the last 150 pages of Harry Potter 6. Even if I had the final book; I probably wouldn't start it right away. Maybe I'd start it tomorrow, and I'm sure I'll be aching for it in a few hours, but it feels good to stop there for now...which is good, since I don't have any choice in the matter. lol

I'm still doing laundry. I'm dead tired, so I should probably get some sleep before work. Then after work I'll have to try to hook up with my L.A. friends. Thursday I'm hopefully seeing Jennifer, and maybe the L.A. crowd. Friday I'm hanging with Shane. Saturday / Sunday it's Corey's turn, and maybe a bit more Jennifer; she's never met anyone I dated while I was dating them; not since Mark anyways, and that was a long ass time ago.

My head hurts.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:57 AM
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   Thursday, May 17, 2007

Most of yesterday kind of sucked, but was redeemed in the final quarter. My head still hurt. I hurt my back, when I tripped and caught myself on the stairs. It was chilly out. And then it got worse from there when I tried to get some sleep and got a call from my sister. I drove Mark to work and was going to send Mollie's package, but that kind of fell apart as well. Thankfully, the bad stuff passed faster than I thought possible (though it felt like a lot longer), I was able to pick Mark up, sleep, and still hang out with Jason & Mark from L.A. I met up with them at Aut Bar around 10:30, and stayed passed closing time. I had an interestingly fruity drink called a "Leg Spreader"; lol. I got to talk to the guys a lot, which was great, and we made some new friends as well. I made sure to call Mollie but she didn't answer - Mark from L.A. & I left Mollie a nice message though.

We went to Pizza House after the bar, and had still more fun. Lots of really good hugs goodbye ;-0) We might hang out tonight as well. I've been trying to get in touch with Jennifer, since I was hoping to hang out with her as well, but I haven't heard back from her, though I've left her a few messages. After I eat in a few minutes, I'll try her again.

I managed to get about 6 hours of sleep when I got home last night, and get my works clothes washed as well. I got up ontime, and I'll probably be early to work today, which is good. Today is shaping up to be much better than yesterday (if I haven't jinxed it by saying that. lol) It still looks kind of yucky out though.

I ordered a used copy of Stargate SG-1, season 1 this morning. One that didn't include the box art (something I'd throw away anyways), from a seller that had 99% positive rating on half.com, and no negative scores, just a couple neutral ones to bring them down. I tried to watch the show when it first aired but didn't like it. I've heard from fans that the first season just isn't that good, but if I'm going to watch a show I really like to see it in order, and we don't have the first disc of the show at work. I payed just over $20.00 for the first season, which is more than $20.00 cheaper than on amazon. On Amazon I bought the movie for exactly the same price that they sell it at work, only I get kickbacks by ordering it through gothboy.com.

The season finale of Smalleville is on tonight, which I'll probably watch tomorrow morning.

   posted by Bald Jason at 11:25 AM
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   Friday, May 18, 2007

I was early to work yesterday; I took an abbreviated lunch, as a customer needed help that only I could provide (Star Trek help, lol), and I worked more than an hour over, I think. I had some really horrible customers. But I managed to stay in good spirits. I worked with Bill, John, Matt & Alex.

After work, Mark & I cleaned a bit, and later Jennifer came over and we caught up on each others' lives. Jennifer has lost a lot of weight, and she has braces, until February. We had a blast, but I think we were all tired. After she left, with my copy of Harry Potter 3 in her hand, I chatted with Corey briefly. Later I went to Aut Bar, not having heard from my L.A. friends, thinking they might be there, but they weren't. I talked to Mollie on the phone, and laughed it up a bit, then chatted with Corey some more, before watching the somewhat disappointing Smallville season finale, and going to sleep.

I woke up a few times, and got out of bed around 5:30am. Not a lot of sleep, but I can't seem to drift back off. I think I might go get some groceries now; I should have gone last night. Or maybe I'll just makeup a list. We'll see. I'll call in my prescription for Prilosec. If I can't get anymore sleep before work, I'll call Shane and see if we can't just meet at Necto, so I can get some sleep after work.

I work today, but then I have Saturday-Tuesday off.

I feel like May 18th is a day I should remember for some reason, but I'm not sure what it is.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:10 AM
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   Saturday, May 19, 2007

I was ready for work over an hour early on Friday. I had managed to get a few more hours sleep, and though I was still very tired, I figured I'd just soldier on through the day. I sent Shane an e-mail letting him know I was planning on sleeping after work, and asking if we could just meet later at Necto. He said he was extremely tired too, and we changed our plans so we can hang out on Monday instead. That was good news.

I dropped Mark off at his work when he came to get me at 12:30pm. I went to Kroger and bought some Gas X, which I'd never taken in my life before, but seemed appropriate. It wasn't. Apparently my acid reflux didn't like it, and everything started coming back up at work. I wasn't in any pain, but it was gross. I was going to stick it out. I sold a bundle and some play guards, I went to the bank for Bryan, and then it got worse. The store was dead, and there were 3 other people there (Bryan, Meg & Alex); I talked to Mark on the phone and he said he could drive me home, or get a ride if I drove myself, and I went home shortly after.

I wanted to lay down, but I had to sit up for a couple hours, until the worst had passed. This is my life I kept thinking. This is what my life has become, and I just accept it. Eventually I laid down and got more sleep, and felt a lot better when I got a call from Mark asking if I could come pick him up after all. I picked up Mark, then we went to Meijer, Kroger & K-Mart, before coming home. I ate. We talked to Mollie on the phone, and that went well. I slept some more. Mollie called me back, and told me some disturbing stories involving man-eating pussycats, people too stupid to notice a fire just next to them, and dreams about her past life in a coal mine. Seriously. That wasn't a dream I had. lol And then I was up.

I started reading the first Star Trek: New Frontier book: "House of Cards". It's a bit better than I remember it being, but it's taking me an awful long time to read a book so small. We'll see how that goes.

As I was typing this Shawn Foreman signed on to yahoo messenger and now we're chatting away. That's nice. ;-0)

I think Carrie graduates today, but I'm not sure. I gave the announcment thing she gave me to Mark to look at and he didn't give it back. If you're reading this Carrie, Congrats!!!

   posted by Bald Jason at 02:38 AM
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I finally finished the hardest setting of Marvel Ultimate Alliance! I was thinking of maybe hooking up AVP2 to all the computers in the condo so maybe we could play with Corey tonight or tomorrow. I'm super exhausted though. I need to turn the air down in here; it's kind of hot. blah.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:51 AM
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I worked on my new picture galleries some more this morning, before falling into bed around 11am. I'm happy with the way they're working out. They are so much larger than the last ones, and I think I've managed to give them a new look and feel, even when using older pictures. I still need lots of new pictures to mix it up with the older ones though. There are already about 94 new pictures (mostly from 06, some from 07, and a few random older ones that just never got posted before) in just the first 6 pages of photos, as those are the only ones I've done so far.

I slept from 11am-4pm. I took a bath. I talked to Mark about the AVP2 game idea and he liked that. I need to go to Walgreens and see if they got my prilosec prescription in; if not, then I'll just have to buy the over the counter variety. I also need to pick up some more earplugs. Oh...and I need some duel layer dvdrs! I should clean my room a bit... and I should get the new Doctor Who that was on today.

Corey should be here in about 3 hours.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:53 PM
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I swear I'm cursed. Anytime I plan anything (without 3 months or more advanced notice) it falls apart...or explodes. Sometimes, even with the advanced notice it all crumbles away.

One of the things that I liked about Corey when I met him online a few years back, was his online profile, and what it said he was looking for. Here's a quote from his current profile concerning what he's looking for in a guy:

"you say you are gonna do something do it dont make excuses about why not or why you cant just do it"

Corey can't make it again. He was really close this time. He was half way here when he got the call from his ex-bf roomie Michael who was crying and wouldn't tell him why. Corey gave me a call letting me know he was going back home to see what was going on (which was dejavu all over again for me), then called me back later to tell me Michael's mom had a stroke, and Corey's now driving Michael up north to see his mother. Last time Corey was going to come over he cancelled because Michael had called him crying because he was so sick. I'm sure he was very sick, and that his mother is very ill - I don't hate him or disbelieve him or anything...it's just really annoying, and I'm disappointed and whiney. It doesn't help that almost everytime that Corey has been here he tells me a new story about how Michael treats him like crap. Michael lies to him. Michael actually spit on him once, as they were going into work! He also hooked up with a guy that Corey had met first, and then when the guy treated Corey badly, Michael didn't defend him. Everytime I plan on us doing anything new it doesn't happen. First it was a gallery show of my friend's, which we didn't make it to. Last time it was going to Necto on Factory Night. This time I was going to introduce him to some friends from out of town.

I kind of get it though. I'm sure people who've read my blog wonder how Mark & I are friends when we have really bad fights and often don't get along. Michael & Corey hang out and do there things together...it's not like they are enemies. I just...I put a lot of effort and planning into having everything perfect for when Corey's here, and then 3 times out of 5 or 6 or whatever...he's cancelled. If he hadn't cancelled tonight he would have gotten here 30 minutes ago. :-0(

Mark installed AVP2 on all the computers and fixed the bugs in them, just so he, Corey & I could all play the game together, because Corey likes video games. Mark likes Corey, last I checked, which is rare, but I'm afraid Mark will start disliking him as he sees me getting hurt like this, and that will just make everything worse. I took Sunday off of work so I could spend time with Corey. I'm not complaining that I have the weekend off...

I'm disappointed.

End of story.

Or not.

If Michael is reading this, I'm very sorry that you were feeling ill awhile back, and that your mother isn't doing well; I sincerely wish you both the best of health, and I'm completely jealous of the times you've spent with Corey when he'd planned to be with me.

If Corey is reading this, I hope you're safe and rested and stress free, and as disappointed as I am. And I hope you find some fantastic way to reverse all this shit and make it up to me. :-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:37 PM
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I drove out to Walgreens and they did have my drugs. I also got push pins and earplugs. lol I'm still in a kind of funk of denial about Corey not being here. When I was leaving the drug store parking lot, I thought to myself: "Hey, I could go visit Mollie while I'm out here. She always makes me smile.". Only I remembered that she doesn't live here anymore and that just made it all worse. :-0( Though if I tell her that story later it might make her laugh a bit, which would make me smile.

Mark & I might watch the new Doctor Who in a while. He's playing a video game right now. Hooking up AVP2 apparently got his game boy on. That's cute.

There's plenty to do actually, sort of, kind of...it just all seems like a substitute for what I really want to be doing. Less than. Blah.

   posted by Bald Jason at 10:38 PM
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