So there I was &

there we were...

Not a dream

but still a blur...

No nightmare though

t'was black as such...

Dark of night...

Jason Wright...

Wrongs unright...

Sharing much...

And never giving in to touch.

Everything &

Nothing...

Special -

Dramatic,

Pragmatic,

Charismatic,

Potential...

& I would not stare

when he met me there;

he was yummy in person;

we were both at such height.

We sat beneath stars

& we drove seperate cars

though I couldn't find mine

& cat piss led to stage fright...

But so far above what was now far below...

In the heavens we whispered

of Zach & of Crow,

of Poppy & Rice,

of Vodka & boyfriends;

The bittersweet endings of loves that should not end.

And there in those moments of calm & of storm...

I wanted for nothing

for he kept me warm;

He passed the test -

though I'm not sure I did -

for I counted & wanted...

doubt mounted & haunted...

behind my confessions I cowardly hid...

For only a moment but a moment it was...

I don't trust myself now & can't now because...

For that stolen moment I wanted for this:

The night to not end...

To not leave this friend...

To not wait...

To escape...

Or at least share a kiss.

Insanity it was & shallow of me...

To think that a moment could yet set me free...

When nothing is easy & pain never leaves...

Though leaves change & fall...

And so must we all...

We all fall from grace

though my soul still believes

that he & I met at the edge of our world -

those moments were magic -

those moments unfurled

& revealed how far we still have to fall...

Nothing means nothing in this world after all.

So we may hedge our bets...

We may leap from that ledge...

Two gothlings plummeting down

now toward the edge

of everything & nothing

& so close to the brink...

But I'm tired...

I'm wired...

& who cares what I think?

- For Bradlee -

Thanx for the ouija, the triangle & your time;

now forget that I wrote this;

forget these damned rhymes!