I was thinking about Travis

Thursday night & I felt so bad

I thought I might break.

I was thinking about all the things

I shouldn't be thinking about now

that Trav is gone & I'm here all alone

again with nothing & no one but friends

& all these boys who want to fuck suck

me while I mourn & I grieve for a wedding vow

fouled by war & distance & devastation.

I was thinking about my friends when

one of them asked why Travis was here &

I jumped up not realizing how much I really

missed him 'till I thought he was here & had

to face the fact that my friend was talking

about another Travis who did not love me

or know me or leave me to suffer & heal &

lose myself in sexual oblivion.

I was thinking all this a few moments ago

when I realized that I was fine & dandy &

having a great time & not fucking anyone though

my cock cries tears for every boy that passes by

& every young poet named Matt & every boy

who went out with Mark named Ryan & every

boy who lives in Adrian on a farm with a headstone

in the yard named Bradlee, & every twenty-something

boy living in Ypsi named Jeremy who has been dating a boy

named Daniel for 2 years & all boy-lesbians named Steve

who wear Siouxsie shirts & have massive music collections.

I'm being chaste.

I'm being chased by the memory of Travis.

I'm being erased.

I'm being defaced & my soul will be revealed

with uncertain grace...

But this revelation is hell -

get me out of this place.

Written By Jason Wright

SEPTEMBER 30, 2006