Saturday, March 28, 2009

Mark's mad at me. I woke up feeling less than fun. I took some Vitamin C & Echinacea, which is now coming back up. I told Mark that I couldn't be ready in 10 minutes, so he cancelled his trip all together - to see his Mom, brother, sister-in-law & nephews; his mom lives in Toledo, but the rest live a lot further away and are in town for a visit. It's sad because I know his nephew Nick, who's soooooo so cute, likes to see his Uncle Mark, and I know Mark likes to see him. I hate that he cancelled his trip. I hate that he's putting this on me, like it's my fault he's not going. I couldn't be ready in 10 minutes even if I wasn't feeling crappy. My throat is making scary noises.

I had odd dreams. Burnt out cities. Homeless rebels. A plan to save the world.

I woke up feeling well rested, in spite of my throat being on fire, and my back still aching. Mark was sweet. Told me that he was sorry for waking me (he was naked, using the vacume cleaner to sweep up his hair, and his butt looked really cute). He brought me the Vitamin C & Echinacea, and brought my clothes up from the dryer. When I told him I thought I might be sick and that a lot of people were sick at the bar (Leon was getting over a tonsil infection, and Ruth had a head/chest cold) and that I wasn't sure I wanted to be around the kids today and risk getting them sick he said that kids are usually sick because they don't wash their hands and stuff. lol. I think he knew I was leaning towards not going and was desperate for me to go, which is sweet, and cute, but in the end it's kind of disturbing too. He should be able to go to these things by himself, and see everyone and be happy, and respect that I don't feel well, and be disappointed that I couldn't make it - without being upset with me. It scares me a little bit. Like if something were to ever happen to me, he'd never go see his family again. The thing is, he's not always like that. He often does go see his family without me. I guess I understand. Sometimes I want him to places with me too. I just don't think it's healthy.

The pills are coming up slightly less now. I'm going to take a shower. I didn't shower after the bar last night and I probably smell like smoke. Maybe a shower will help me feel better?

   posted by Bald Jason at 01:13 PM
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