Sunday, September 4, 2005

I thought a lot on Saturday. I read a lot of CNN stuff, and I caught up on sleep. I cleaned my room a bit. I later went to a party at Andy's house; it was fun, though a lot smaller than the last one. Still, I got to play euchre which was nice, and I got to see some people. It's was low key; which is actually how I dressed, so that worked out.

I went to Kroger after the party, and I've been home for like, an hour. I read the new Entertainment Weekly. It's possible that ALIAS is gonna suck this year, but maybe I'm wrong. I'm making some food, and I'm gonna watch some Xena (oh yeah, my new Xena set to replace the faulty one arrived this week, and I watched the disc that was previously damaged earlier today as well). I'm tired, but I'm so hungry I'm gonna eat, and then stay up so I don't get sick.

I wonder how Mollie, Carrie, Adam, Karen, Shawn & Jonathan are doing?

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:29 AM
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I just had the hottest dream! I dreamt that I was still living with my parents (that's not the hot part), and I was a lot younger than I am now; I was in High School, and this guy showed up at our church who seemed to know me, but I didn't know who he was, which upset him. I later learned that he was my older cousin, who thought I was cool when I was little because we talked about Battle of The Planets & stuff, & I had a huge crush on him when I was little. The face of the guy in my dream, was not of anyone that's really a cousin of mine; he was in the last Xena episode I watched before falling asleep: "King Kon". But he was definitely based on my cousin Jeff, which leave me feeling kind of sad. Anyways, in the dream, even though I in high school and younger it was also like I was the way I am now, and I remember telling him that Battle of the Planets seemed really cool when we were kids, but it's on DVD now, and it actually sucks, and that it's better just to remember it as being good... But then we caught an episode of Robotech and I said that it had continued to be pretty good, but mostly because it was kind of adult to begin with, and we talked about Lisa Hayse. lol And he seemed kind of sad that his childhood memories were broken in the light of adulthood. This we discussed while watching tv in my bedroom at my parents' house wrapped around each other. This was very late in the dream - earlier we were making out in church - on a pew, and no one seemed to notice or care. It was all really hot, but it was all very sad too... He was only visiting for a week, and he had to leave (shades of Kyle - hmm) and we had to say goodbye; what a kiss! After he was gone, I remembered he told me that when we were both younger and we talked about these tv shows he thought we had something special but that I had also talked like that with our cousin Brandon, and I remembered that I had wrote about that so I stopped on the street (Liberty in Ann Arbor) to look in my old poetry folder to find the poem about him, because even in the dream, even though I remembered him earlier, I knew that I couldn't remember his face, and I couldn't remember his name, which was killing me, because if I couldn't remember those things, then how could I find him again? That's when Ann Arbor was suddenly a disaster zone; filled with water and people dying, like in New Orleans...except that people kept stopping at a table on the street where I continued to look for the old poem, and they signed a petition that was somehow supposed to help the Katrina victims. I went into the Necto and remembered dancing with my cousin there. And then I woke up.

If that was at all confusing, it's probably because I should so still be asleep, but I didn't want to forget that. I know that some of the guy was based on the Xena actor, and some of the actual situations were based on my cousins Jeff, Kyle, Scott & Brandon. Janice & David Grinell(?) were in the dream. It was very erotic, but very sad. I'll have to explain who all these people are later, because I'm going to brush my teeth, and then lay down again.

   posted by Bald Jason at 11:47 AM
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   Monday, September 5, 2005

I slept until about 3:30pm. Mark wasn't home when I wandered out of my room; he apparently went to Best Buy to drool on his tv again. I checked some stuff out on line. I jacked off, and showered and stuff. I had a fairly large meal while I continued with Season 3 of Xena (When In Rome...) then got ready for work and arrived about 6 minutes late. It was basiclaly just me & Nate for the whole Nate (though Heidi stayed for awhile) and we were so busy!!! We didn't get breaks, but I accepted that as soon as I realized how busy we were, and I just concentrated on not killing anybody. It worked. But I'm wiped. I'm gonna have a snack & watch some more Xena. Probably. Or maybe I'll collapse.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:45 AM
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I watched Xena & Herc last night, and got very little sleep as I was feeling all acidy. I went to work at 1pm, which was thankfully dead, and it was fun to work with DJ, Bryan, Nate & eventually Matt. I didn't have to drive Mark to or from work, which was fantastic, and rush hour traffic didn't exist; very nice. After work I took a brief nap, laying naked on top of my sheets, took a shower, and I called Mollie back (I called her at work) and listened to all the morbid news from the passed week. She survived it all which I'm grateful for, and she wants to play games Friday night, which I invited Bryan too, who is trying to quit smoking, which I fully support. I watched an episode of DC with Mark while I ate, and then I decided to go to my Grandma's for a bible (long story) and drop of a cd for my sister, and pick up Mark's card from Jennifer - only I screwed up the cd, Janice has Mark's Jennifer card, and gas prices suck so I cancelled the trip, and now I'm kind of in limbo while I decide if I'm up for Necto tonight.

   posted by Bald Jason at 10:37 PM
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   Tuesday, September 6, 2005

I didn't go to Necto. I recorded Bryan's tape. I slept until a little after 1am, and then when I got up my stomach was a bit upset so I had trouble getting back to sleep. I finished recording Bryan's tape so I could give it to him today, but my stomack is still upset & I'm wondering if I should maybe call in? I really don't like calling into work, but I hate working in this condition even more. I'll have to decide what I'm going to do soon.

   posted by Bald Jason at 11:53 AM
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   Wednesday, September 7, 2005

I called into work yesterday; the whole day pretty much sucked, but I tried not to think about it. When Mark got home he said he ran into Ben at a gas station and that he asked if I was ok, but Mark hadn't heard from me since just after my last entry, so he didn't know. I really wanted to work yesterday too because Ben was gonna be back, and I had that tape to give to Bryan, along with Angels In America, which he told me he wanted to borrow sometime at Mark's party. I didn't really do anything yesterday. erg.

I finished the 1st disc of Xena - Season 4, and then watched the first few Hercules - Season 5 episodes (the only Season of Herc that I truly enjoy), and then I tried to play Diablo II but ended up deleting my favorite character :-0( I spent most of the night trying fix things.

I just saw the trailer for Brokeback Mountain, which I've been looking forward to seeing. I'm pretty sure it's gonna make me cry; maybe Mollie will see it with me. I also want to see Dorian Blues which she may enjoy also, as there's a priest in that one ;-0)

I'm trying not to spend any more cash, as we're rapidly moving into brokesville. I know everybody knows this already, but gas prices suck! Doctor Bills Suck. A lot of things sucking lately. Except for me. I'm still not with the sucking. And actually, my jaw, which has hurt most of my life, has been getting worse - which worries me. Somedays it hurts to talk, or laugh, or eat. It's not good.

I have very little ambition. I've never really known what I wanted to do in life. The only things that have ever seemed important to me are people and interacting with them, and exploring myself in the process. I must be pretty weird.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:24 AM
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Xena makes me smile. And cry. And smile. I feel so much better today! Today is good. I slept 8 hours (which is a rarity these days), and I'm not uncomfortable, which is nice. And I've got Xena to tide me over when I'm bored. I wish Friday would hurry up and get here: I miss Mollie!!!

Oh, there's a fantastic interview with Joss Whedon concerning Serenity on line, and I found another interview with Dwayne McDuffie about Justice League Unlimited. I love news about my shows.

When I was younger I watched a disturbing amount of television! And now...I don't. I watch TV shows on DVD in spurts, but the only TV Shows that I watch as they air are ALIAS & JLU. I read the news at cnn.com. I check my e-mail & work on my webpage; write in my blog. I just don't have time for a lot of tv shows I guess. Or I refuse to make the time for them, when I think that they mostly suck. Most shows that I enjoy get cancelled after a season or two anyways.

Mark should be home soon. I need to clean my room some more. I feel good. I wish I could see more of my friends today.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:07 PM
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   Thursday, September 8, 2005

I showed Mark the Brokeback Mountain Trailer and he said that he wanted to see it with me in the theater, but he seemed to think it wouldn't have a large release, but with that cast, and that director, based on that story, and the amount of attention it has gotten by the press... I believe that it will. And hopefully, it won't suck. lol

I watched even more Xena. But I think I'm growing bored with it for the moment, which is fine. I'm looking forward to work today. Oh, and DJ let me borrow the Dungeons & Dragons toons but they wouldn't play on my computer :-0( I'll survive; probably. But I'm bored right now, in general, and I don't feel like watching anything or playing anything, and I just woke up so I don't feel like sleeping.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:55 AM
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   Friday, September 9, 2005

I did have trouble sleeping Friday morning, and I my right eye had some odd discomfort thing going on. Well - my right eye to me - my left eye to everyone else. I thought I'd popped a blood vessel; that's common in my family (probably all the in-breeding). Work started out not so good on Friday; I had a headache and ended up scraping my back up... But then painkiller made everything ok. I took a nap after work and then went to Borders because I had a coupon I wanted to use, but I ended up spending more money than I wanted to. I have a couple more coupons, but I think I might just let them expire so I can save my money. I also rented some porn last night, and this one I watched was disturbingly hot. roar. I watched an episode of Hercules last night, and then went to bed.

I woke up today with my eye hurting a bit more, so I examined it further to see what was going on. I spoke to Mollie on the phone last night and she said that it might be a sty, and that she had them a lot when she was younger and that they were very painful. Apparently that's probably what I have, on the inside of eyelid. It's painful and I have a doctor's appointment on Monday morninng, with the possability of going in tomorrow morning if the condition worsens. It hurts, but it's not overwhelmingly painful - it's like I have a zit on the inside of my eyelid. It's just uncomfortable, and kind of odd. lol

Either way, I need to take a hot shower (kind of a hot compress for my eyeball) and I need to clean up a bit, as Mollie & Bryan are coming over tonight for games ;-0) Mollie will be coming home with Mark when he gets off work at 6pm, but Bryan will be arriving later at about 9pm. I'm really looking forward to spending time with my friends.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:11 PM
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   Saturday, September 10, 2005

So Paul called me last night (from San Francisco) to ask me about seeing Serenity as he thinks he'll be in town around then - which would be cool ;-0) Plus tons of other people I know are going. Mark, Mollie, Kenny, Adam, Carrie, a different Paul & his friends, Bryan, Ben, Robert, Diana, Chris & her coworkers - and I think I might be forgetting some people. Even if the movie sucks (which I can't really imagine) I want it to make a lot of money; Joss deserves it, and I deserve sequels damn it!

Mark picked up Mollie after work but had to go to the store a couple of times and stuff while I cleaned the condo. My sty was really getting annoying and uncomfortable; hot compresses were used. Bryan & his son Robert showed up around 9:20pm and we played TROUBLE & Rich Man, Poor Man - and Euchre. I kept Bryan from smoking, and I had Mark buy his some suckers to help him & Robert quit. It was fun. After Bryan & Robert left we played Scrabble, which I've never really loved, but I managed to have fun - and I would have won except I have apparently been playing the wrong way all these years. Weird.

Mark drove Mollie home, with me in the car to keep him awake, because I didn't think it was a good idea for me to drive with the sty bugging me. I think I was doing a pretty good job of not ripping my eyeball out, because that's all I wanted to do! I whined about it a little bit every once in awhile, but it was constantly annoying me, so I think I handled it pretty well. After we dropped off Mollie, we dropped off the porn I rented (we're all about saving gas money these days).

We decided that we would get up at 7 or so, so we could call and make an appointment for my eye today at 8 when the place opened. We did that, but then when I looked at my inner eyelid the sty seemed to have improved dramatically - it still stings a bit, but I think that's because it popped. My outer lid is a bit swollen, but I think it's getting better, so we left a message saying that we wanted to cancel the appointment, and then tried to call them to let them know but we were on hold for like 20 minutes, and we were the 6th callers in the "line"; we gave up momentarily, and I called back shortly and got through almost right away, so that's taken care of. I really hope my eye is ok. If it's better tomorrow then I'll cancel my appointment for Monday, and if it's still really sore maybe I'll go in as a followup kind of thing.

I let Mollie borrow Hedwig & the Angry Inch and The Feast of All Saints; she's seen Hedwig, but not Feast, which was a miniseries made for cable based on the Anne Rice novel, which I think Mollie might enjoy. I gave Bryan his tape of JLU/Batman Beyond, Xena, DS9, Drawn Together & more JLU, and I let him borrow Angels In America which he had mentioned wanting to borrow a while ago. I hope they both enjoy their movies - er...my movies. lol

Mollies been having all kinds of troubles (I want to say lately, but it's just been one thing after another for such a long time now!) which sucks! Hopefully things will improve for her. Bryan & Robert are trying to quit smoking which is hopefully going to work out; Bryan has been smoking for 20 years!?!

Oh, and if my eye is better tomorrow I can work, which I was worried that I wouldn't be able to do, because, well - it was getting bad.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:44 AM
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I woke up about an hour ago. I watched "The Prince of Tides" before going to sleep, and my dreams were all wrapped up in the movie. I first saw the film with my ex-gf Jen Beam, who thought it might be a powerful film for me; it was; I cried a lot; thanks Jen. I haven't seen Jen in about 7 years, but I wish I had her phone # or her address, and I hope she is doing well. I have seen that movie several times over the years. It's seems slightly more cheesy than the last time I saw it, but the good still outweighs the bad, and there's another layer too it now, as back in summer 2001, while trapped in Travis Kelley's basement (his parents were out of town & I stayed the week - but he had to work, and his dad's co-workers, who worked out of the bodyshop next to the house were not to see me staying there) I read his mother's copy of the novel. The book makes me remember that week with Travis, when things were still great between us, and there was nothing to sour my memories of him; I remember his room, his home in great detail, though the days there are a bit blurred between hanging out with his friends, and fucking (we had really good sex).

My eye looks even better than it did this morning, for which I'm grateful; that sty was really beyond annoying. 3 more GLBT titles arrived for my shelf, which I love. I love the idea of my movie shelf, and how there are tons of them there that I've never seen. I love knowing that on a day where I don't feel all that great, I can watch an assortment of these movies, and see how there are so many different stories and perspectives to gay peoples lives; be they portrayed as human, monsters, killers, lovers, friends, neighbors, anything under the sky. Sometimes I'll get a movie & Mark will point out that it's not a gay positive role or something, and to me that's not really the point. The idea of the shelf is that it doesn't deny gay existence, or in some cases, the idea that men can have sex with men. It's the denial of such things that bothers me. And for all those (mostly older) movies that portray gay people in a negative light, there are now a good assortment of positive portrayals to balance them out, and not all gay people are heroes or lovable, and as long as there is a balance of such stories, it doesn't bother me.

New episodes of JLU in one week ;-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:45 PM
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