Monday, April 17, 2006

Haven't been able to get to sleep. I worked on Mark's track a bit more, though I can't talk about it, as it's a surprise. I hope I can finish it in time for his birthday; it's very complicated. I have other gifts for him, but this one is super special. Of course I could give it to him on my birthday. lol

I watched "Breakfast On Pluto" which was enjoyable, if not fantastic, and I think Mollie would really really enjoy it. Speaking of Mollie, I really, REALLY want to take her to see V for Vendetta this week if I can. I really want to see it again, and she wants to see it now too, so that would rock. I've been trying to get in touch with Carrie over the last few days, but we keep missing each other. I haven't heard from Paul or Steve since Thursday.

Work was sometimes busy, sometimes dead last night. It was an odd mix of people. As far as workers go, it was me, Nate and Andrea, plus Heidi stopped by later on. I love Andrea, but her frequent smoke breaks seem excessive, and long. She even took a 10 minute one 25 minutes before she was scheduled to leave. That's pretty lame. I know that smokers have a craving for cigarettes, but it doesn't seem fair that they get all these breaks so they can poison themselves. If it's a once in awhile thing it really doesn't bother me, but when it's every shift that I work with the person, and they go on 2 or 3 of them, and it's not a quick fix kind of thing...it's just really lame & annoying. Which is too bad because Andrea is cool when she actually WORKS.

I watched some Buffy at work, and may watch more later. I'm so tired, but I can't get to sleep. Probably because I slept all of yesterday. I had a horrible nightmare that Mark had killed this woman five years ago, and the FBI were close to discovering this, and when I confronted Mark to tell me what was going on, he told me his secret, and how he had killed this woman in cold blood - it was so gross - and then he had hidden parts of her in our bathroom wall. The FBI was putting up these walls around our condo, and a gunfight was imminent. I went out to them and turned myself in, and explained that I had just learned the truth, and they called me a fag, and when I talked about how much I loved Mark, this guy laughed like I was crazy, and I screamed at him about how we'd been together for more than 10 years and that shut him up... his partners looked pissed at him too. I woke up around then. It was really strange. I think most of it was because our neighbors were working on something in their bathroom, and I could hear the pounding.

I'm gonna try to sleep again now. Mark is taking the bus to work, which means I can sleep a little bit longer, and I can leave work on time. That's nice of him, though I wonder if it doesn't have anything to do with the hottie girl who he noticed taking the bus the last time he was bussing it to work, a few weeks ago. ;-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:19 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Thursday, April 20, 2006

I just finished watching the 3rd Season of The L Word. I liked it. I mean, I still like the show. I really enjoy it actually, and that's all I'm gonna say because I have friends that haven't finished watching it, and I don't want to spoil anything for them.

I had my ultrasound on Tuesday, and I have a doctor's appointment today, so maybe I'll actually have some answers soon? I took Mark, Mollie & Bryan to see V for Vendetta Tuesday night. Bryan & Mollie liked the movie, Mark thought the movie was ok, but his viewing was complicated by assholes at the theater, and he wasn't happy with the volume of the movie; he says he's never going there again. I really don't blame him. Theaters just aren't as fun as they used to be. More often than not, there are annoying people in the theater that talk all through the movie, often times on cell phones. When I do go, I enjoy earlier shows, where there are less people. And I find myself wanting to go to more shows by myself, and just lose myself in the movie. Is that weird? Bryan wants us all to see X3 on opening night, and that doesn't bother me; we all saw X2 opening night (at different shows) and it was a blast. Sometimes audiences can be cool. Opening nights at fan favorites (X-Men, Serenity) tend to rock, because everyone is there to SEE & HEAR the movie, and most people don't make noise except when it seems to make sense. I'm looking forward to X3.

The track for Mark is kicking my ass. The words (my words) are simple, and direct, but I find myself wanting to edit them done to their most concise form...and yet I want to tell him so many things! This is actually emblemanic of all of my recordings. I find the long ones, even though they are from the heart, can be boring, and I don't want that for him. I want something that is...perfection. Or at the very least, not annoying. I'll keep working on it, but if it's not done on his birthday... I wish it could be, but I think it might not be, and that's got me a bit down. But really, it doesn't matter when I give it to him, as long as he knows how I feel, and I know that he does. This is just...something extra. ;-0) I love him.

I let DJ borrow the final season of Buffy and the final 3 of Angel. He's really digging it. He wants me to make a list for him of all the episodes, with a blurb after each title ("the one with the tragic bride's maids dresses") so he can rate them! That's so something I have done, because I am a huge geek with issues. lol He loves the Buffy Musical Soundtrack I gave him, and told me he listens to it in the car, and that it made him cry. It's really cool to have another friend who enjoys the show like I do. ;-0) He wants to come over and play the Buffy board game sometime. Sounds like fun.

Bryan & Chris are officially engaged; they got a ring. I haven't seen it yet, but I'm sure it's beautiful. They both seem really happy, and I think that everyone who has the pleasure of knowing them, knows that this is right, and wonderful. They are just so....I'm so happy for them!!! Mollie was telling me that Bryan's mother Di wants us all to come hang out with her for cards or something soon, and that she loves feeding Mark. She was also asking what she could cook that I would eat...um...good luck.

About my eating. I don't talk about this often, because it's embarassing. I don't eat other people's cooking...like at their houses. I just...don't. The closest I've ever come is when I had a whole bunch of Coffee that Christopher made me when I was with him in Windsor, circa May 2000. The coffee was good, and the sex was good, and it was fun. ;-0) Plus we watched Buffy, and straight porn; lol. What's not to love?

When I was younger I had this crazy, CRAZY Father, who had some freaky rules about eating. And a lot of that stayed with me for my life. And when I tried to get over that...when I tried to see food as something that wasn't hurtful, or painful, or whatever...I starting trying new things. Not all at once, but baby steps. I had chicken, which I loved, and I had a hamburger which was good, and I started eating pizza when I was in high school (and I never really stopped), but then I had all these acid type problems hit me and then food became something painful again, and something that I wish I could just do without, even though there are a lot of things I do enjoy eating. But there are so many things that I don't eat that most people do. A lot of it outright disgusts me, which I know isn't normal, and probably not right, but this part of my life is really, really complex. Food is just this really confusing thing for me. I don't get it. And I don't think I ever will. But it was so much worse when I was in grade school. I can't even express it. But I visit my mom, and I see our old house, and I can see why I had issues. It wasn't just my dad. Our house is so GROSS, no one should have to live there. I actually stopped eating my mom's cooking very early on. I think my mom did the best that she could do...but...ok - that's a lie. I think she could have done better, but doesn't choose to, and I don't know why. She used to smoke cigarettes while she cooked (like the mom does for comedy on Married...With Children) - the kitchen was always filthy (ALWAYS). And when we (we meaning everyone who was not my mother) tried to clean it we actually got in trouble. Isn't that crazy? That's like horrific crazy. I think about this everytime I go home, and I just feel so lucky that I've survived at all, and that I'm not in that environment anymore.

I spoke to my cousin Joy the other day. It was really great talking with her, if only for about 20 minutes. She's doing well, though she has a cold. She just got done teaching a class on gothic/horror stories and films...I think. Wacky, huh? She's got about another year (she thinks) and she'll hopefully have her PHD. I want to talk to her again sometime soon, in person. We haven't really been in touch in more than a decade, and I just think it would be a lot of fun to exchange stories.

I have to drop Mark off at the dentist, go to my doctor's appoinment, pick Mark up, drop Mark off, and come back here. And pick Mark up from work at 6pm. I don't really have any other plans today, which is oddly comforting. I got some TLA catalogs in the mail yesterday, and I think I left them at work yesterday. I'll drop by later and get them, I guess.

And now, I'm going to get a snack, and maybe read for awhile, or something.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:05 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Friday, April 21, 2006

My doctor's appointment went fine; it seems I passed the kidney stone, just as I had suspected, and there don't seem to be any more (yay!). I was in & out in like 15 minutes. I had dropped Mark off at the dentist before the visit, and when I went to pick him up, I made an appointment for myself. I haven't seen a dentist in a few years, and I probably have a cavity or something. I started seeing a dentist again back in 2000 I think, but the place was in Ohio, and it was a pain to drive out there...so I switched to this guy in Ann Arbor, but he was so horrible. He was mean, and he hurt me. And I just didn't want to ever see a dentist again after that. Later we learned he wasn't even licenced. But this place seems really nice, and Mark seems happy there, so I'm up for it. ;-0) It's really nice having insurance and Mark says he's happy I'm taking advantage of it, which I'm also enjoying. ;-0)

About Mark's track. I could rush it, and it would be nice, and everything, but I've decided I'm going to take it slow. I'm thinking about doing a cd with tracks for my close friends, with messages for them... But this would be something special. Usually when I finish a track I have to show it to everyone and get feedback (I'm a Leo), but I'd like to try to finish all these tracks and then give it to my friends all at once or something. Maybe Christmas, or something like that. I think that would rock. Only I might need Mark's help with the cover, since our latest printer sucks. erg. Anyways, I feel good about this decision, though I'm a little worried about not finishing it. I haven't finished a cd project in years.

I watched "Straight Acting" & "B. Monkey" tonight. Love my GLBT inclusive collection; very interesting movies! I don't know if I mentioned this or not, but when Paul was here he asked about 2 queer titles, that of course I don't own (bitch), but I was aware of both of them, and I want them. lol Books & DVDs. I collect them. Also Fan/Het/Slash art, and music. But I impulsivly buy the GLBT dvds. I want my collection to be COMPLETE. ;-) When my tax return gets here, I know I'll be tempted to spend it, when I should probably just keep it in the bank...

...though, I'd really like a bike, and the saftey equipment to ride around town, possilby to work. That would be fun, and good exercise, and save on gas. It's a thought anyways. I feel like I'm way out of shape. And tired. I'm very tired. I should sleep.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:25 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

Motherfucker! Sometimes when I'm typing an entry, I'll accidentally hit a few keys with the palm of my hand, and I'll somehow delete the entire post. It really fucking sucks!!!!!!

Besides that my day has gone very well. Work was good. Our new District Manager (Gloria) was with us today; she used to work with us years ago, and she really fits in. She's easily the best DM we've ever had while I've been at Hollywood. The day went by super quick. Especially since I'm still supposed to be there, but DJ said I could go if I wanted because of labor hours being low. I said sure, and here I am.

DJ is now half way through Season 7 of Buffy, and will most likely have finished the series by the time I see him again. I have Saturday, Sunday & Wednesday off for sure. I don't know what my schedule is like beyond that.

When I got home, I learned that Star Trek XI has been announced by Paramount, and that it will be a prequel to Classic Trek featuring the story of how young Kirk & Spock met at the academy, and their first mission in space. I think this could be fabulous if handled correctly. It could be funny, and sweet, and really cool - just think of all those futuristic-retro hair styles!!! ;-0) lol It would be nice to have something that could make Classic Trek look cool again too. And a nice bridge between Enterprise and Classic Trek. JJ Abrams (ALIAS/Lost/Felicity/Mission Impossible III) is doing it, and I hope it's good.

I'm tempted to watch the latest ALIAS episodes tonight, but I'm also tempted to hold off on them until the show is finished, and then watch them all at once. That might be cool...if I can hold out!

I'm really very tired. But I'm afraid that if I take a nap now I won't wake up to pick up Mark. I think I might have a snack, shower, put on some shorts or something... Whatever I do, I'm done here.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:50 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I caved. I watched ALIAS. And I screamed at the tv. I begged one character to shoot another. And then I cried. A lot. And then at the last second...I cheered, with my hands in the air. The last 3 episodes of ALIAS have been so good; like Season 2 good! There are only 4 more episodes to go. The truth is I really enjoy this show, except for the one plot hole they never, ever fixed. Beyond that it's all good. I'm gonna get some food, and I might go out later.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:34 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Saturday, April 22, 2006

I went to Aut Bar, and ran into several old friends. Matt & his friend were leaving just as I was arriving. Matt & I have known each other for years, but lately I've been wondering about maybe getting to know him better. He's really nice, and funny, and we fit together well. ;-0)

After Aut Bar I hit Necto, where Matt was going. I met tons of people, and saw old friends, often just in passing. I saw Scott & Travis, (Becky was at Labyrinth!?!). My disturbingly handsome friend James gave me this huge hug, which gave me a hardon, that was more than obvious to him, and his friends, which was hot & funny all at the same time. Robert was working and he looked so cool; he wants to go to City Club in May, as does Matt ;-0) Sounds like that could be really hot. There was a cute latino boy that flirted with me, named Frankie. He lives with his parents in Detroit, and has no car; he's 27, and he's living at home because he was having problems with depression. I've been there...done that. There was a cute blonde boy that always seemed to be around me, and I wanted to let him know he was cute, and that he shouldn't be so shy, but everytime I was about to, someone would pull me aside, and I couldn't find him when the bar closed. That's my one regret from the night. I did however dance with Matt, and that was a lot of fun. Plus we had a nice kiss goodnight. They played a remix of SOS by Rhianna at the end of the night (which I'd never heard); I thought they were playing Tainted Love and really danced hard; it rocked! I had a lot of fun. I didn't dress goth either. I was wearing colors, and I didn't wear any makeup or jewelry! It was like a vaction from me.

Anyways - had a blast - really glad I went. I should go to Kroger and get some groceries, but I'm not sure I have the energy now. I'm all smokey, so I should take a shower. I'd like to watch more ALIAS but no more new episodes have aired. Maybe I could watch the entire series from the beginning over the course of the next 4 weeks, and watch the last 4 episodes after that...but I don't know that I want to take the time to do that. DJ asked me how ALIAS was, and I didn't give it a great review, but I'd like to see it all again on DVD, really fast... Maybe. I'm hungry.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:19 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I've watched the first 4 episodes of ALIAS. I don't enjoy it as much now, as I once did. This is just a side effect of my memory being so good, I think. But there are still moments that shine. The think the pilot episode is easily the best television pilot that I've ever seen. Everyone is perfectly cast; even the bit players. The music, lighting, tone, and all of that is great. And all the characters and backstories are introduced without seeming like a huge introduction - it just seems natural. ALIAS was great television, and I'm glad I got to experience it.

I had the best orgasm today. It was just...WOW! It was nice. I was moaning so loud that Mark heard me through my closed bedroom door! I really needed that after last night.

I might go out tonight, but I'm not sure. I don't know what I'm doing tonight.

I gave Mark his b-day presents today, instead of tomorrow. They weren't the overwhelming gifts of last year, but I gave him stuff that I thought he would enjoy. I wish I could afford to do HUGE things for him every year...

I've never taken the public bus before. Ever. Mark might teach me how tomorrow. I think that would be fun. I might go for a walk later. I guess I might do a lot of things later. I should get in touch with Paul and see how home life is going, and how Michelle's baby turned out.

I'm gonna go now.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:36 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]