Sunday, March 4, 2007

Mark did calm down...sort of. He was obsessed with getting my voicemail 'fixed' when I was fine with the way it was. We went to T-Moble and that went fine, then the Sprint store couldn't help me with my phone, and we went to Little Caesars, where Mark went slightly mad again. It all turned out ok though...I guess. It was strange, and I'm glad it's over...if it's really over.

I watched some Enterprise and read last night, though not as much as I have been lately. I slept a bit. I talked to Luke; we might hang out Monday. I got some wicked mashups last night. One of them featured a new NIN song, and I found more of their new stuff on myspace, and added my new favorite song to my profile there. I've been grooving to the new tunes for a few hours now. I'm pretty exhausted...but it's really warm in my room now, and I don't think I could sleep. I had Mark turn up the heat Saturday because, for once, it was actually cold in my room; the neighbors must have been out for the day and left the heat off or something. Oh...well.

Oh. My left eye has been twitching for 2 days. Make it stop! ;-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:20 AM
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I woke up with a bad headache, which only got worse as the day progressed. I didn't want to take my Midrin, as it has caffiene in it, and I'd already had a bit; I didn't want the combined dose to make my stomach retch. Eventually I had to give in though, and I took a scalding hot shower, which often helps with my headaches. The headache is fading now, but so is everything else. I used to like taking my meds because it was so relaxing; now I avoid it if I can. I don't know if I'll be able to drive to work; I asked Mark if he could drop me off, but he seems to think I should just call in. I'm not going to do that though. Either he's driving me, or I'm going to give it a go. I can probably make it fine, but I don't like to take risks like that... though I suppose if I crashed into something that didn't hurt anyone else it would be ok, as I probably wouldn't feel it. That was me trying to look on the bright side.

Watched more Enterprise. Ate. I didn't listen to more NIN as my head was killing me, but I find myself humming their older tunes today. I need to finish getting ready for work.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:07 PM
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   Monday, March 5, 2007

Mark drove me to work after all. I had Nate shut off the movie that was playing, and I kept my sunglasses on. The pain was muted, but constant. We got everything done though.

I read and had a snack when I got home, and fell asleep shortly there after. I had strange dreams. I woke up, when a program I was downloading was finished; my computer chime alerting me. I checked my e-mail. There were 2 messages from a 26 yo guy who just moved to Ann Arbor to be with his boyfriend, who wanted to meet people 'on his wavelength', and apparently thought I might be such a person. I don't know if I am, but I responded.

I checked my myspace page, and heard that haunting new NIN song again. Then I read more of the new Enterprise novel, which is really, really fantastic. The NIN song was playing in my head throughout some emotional scenes, and I know from past experiences that the 2 experiences (the book & the song) will be forever linked in my brain. I like that about myself. I ache to listen to the music, and read some more.

My headache, which seemed to be gone, is still with me. Not nearly as bad as it was, but still terrible. I think my migrains are getting worse. I don't know what would cause that, but it's something that I'm hoping will pass. I should take more pain killer, but I don't want to. I kind of hate it actually, though I don't know why that is. I think it's a new reaction, and not just one that I've only just come to understand. I hate it. Though the relief of pain is welcomed.

"And the sky is filled with light; can you see it? All the black is really white if you believe it. And the longing that you feel, when you know the answer's real; you will find a better place in this twilight." - "In This Twilight" - Nine Inch Nails

I think I'll get something cool to drink, take some motrin; see if that helps. I'll continue to read, or maybe watch the new Brothers & Sisters.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:50 AM
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I tried watching the new Brothers & Sisters this morning, but the sound & picture went out of synch about 10 minutes into it, so I downloaded another copy, and read some more. I eventually slept, though my acid reflux was in overdrive. I woke around 2:30pm. I read some more, and I'm now over half way through the new Enterprise book. I read my e-mail, and backed up my slash art collection. I checked my voicemail to see if Luke had called but he hadn't. I'll call him later; he sometimes sleeps really late.

I have today & the next 3 days off of work. I don't know if I mentioned this in the last entry, but I was about 15 minutes early for work, and then didn't get to take my lunch, as I was the only one at the front of the store. By the time everything was done and I could have taken my break, there wasn't enough time left in my shift to take it. I couldn't leave either, because Nate needed to count down some drawers, and even if he put that off until after the store closed, I didn't drive. It was mostly ok though. I mean, I wasn't desperate for a break. I would have just put my head down anyways.

I should eat soon.

I read this article today about the movie "300", which I had suspected was the case anyways. The whole de-queering of "Troy", "Domino", "A Beautiful Mind" and other such films is what set me off on collecting as many GLBT inclusive films as possible a few years back. I know the graphic novel that "300" is based on doesn't feature any positive gay role models, but it's almost like seeing "Troy" where there are supposed to be gay characters. It pisses me off. GLBT people exist, and always have. Get over it. Stop denying us.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:01 PM
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   Tuesday, March 6, 2007

I called to invite Luke to Necto a bit after 7pm, but he didn't anser; I left him a message. I thought maybe I wouldn't end up going as some stuff came up and I got side-tracked. While that was going on, I exchanged some more e-mails with the boy that movied to Ann Arbor and contacted me via e-mail the other day; I think his name is Joe; he seems cool. I like that my webpage didn't freak him out.

I did end up going to Necto, and had a blast. It turned out to be Gothic Prom!?! WTF? It was really packed, but the music kicked ass. I wore my sunglasses in the bar on impulse, which kind of rocked. I danced to some crazy Doctor Who music, with the Daleks!?! I danced with Christine & Bobby; at least I think his name is Bobby; I fucking suck with names. Actually...I fuck & suck with boys named Bobby, but not this one. His name is so Bobby; I just checked his myspace page. I met Bobby through Matt (who I dated briefly), and though I met Christine through Bobby, she works with my ex-bf Steve. I'm such a whore sometimes. Only not.

I met other folks at Necto. I danced with some other people that I don't know. It was all good fun. I came home sweaty; called Luke & left him another message. I jacked off; took a shower, and called Jesse; Luke's friend, who had given me his number on myspace. He was stoned, and in Adrian, at his friend Coley's, where Luke was passed out in bed. Jesse let me go so he could head home, and I wrote this. I need to get dressed, and go shopping. I mixed a new mashup cd for the car, and want to play it loud while I go shopping. ;-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:05 AM
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I changed my mind. I'm staying in. Mostly because I'm starving and what to feast. But also on the off chance that I might get some rest and be awake in time to drive Mark to work, or switch on his lunch break, so I can go to Middle Earth or someplace and get some shirts and stuff. I need new clothes and stuff. Some of it is for props for pix, but it's really all stuff that I need anyways...well, mostly. Blah.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:09 AM
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Someone just sent me a text message, but I can't read it, because I have my old phone back, and it doesn't allow me to read them. I don't have to pay for them anymore, the way I used to, but I can't ready them. I'm guessing it was Luke or Heidi. Everyone else just calls me. Oh well.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:58 AM
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I'm not going shopping today, I don't think. I got wonderfully sidetracked by you.tube! I was watching clips from this funny British show called "Friday Night Project", which featured Billie Piper at one time, and David Tennant at another, so this Doctor Who fan was having a blast. Then I watched some of Billie Piper's old music videos which were really interesting, as I'd never known she was a singer before seeing Doctor Who, which she did later. Doctor Who starts up again in about 25 days! ;-0)

I'm so tired. But I think I might have trouble sleeping, and will most likely be awake for hours to come. I don't want to drive Mark to work and do the shopping thing, because I know eventually I'll crash and I'll not want to get out of bed to pick him up later. lol I try not to plan things because I just kind wander from one thing to the next, and sometimes it can be helped, and other times where it really can't. I sometimes wish some of my health issues weren't a problem, and that I could live my life differently, and there are other times, like right now, where I don't really care...but I guess that's probably normal.

I called Mollie this morning to tell her of my morning viewing, and she asked me to send her the links, but she had to go. She has the flu now, which sucks. I hope she'll be ok.

   posted by Bald Jason at 09:02 AM
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   Wednesday, March 7, 2007

The last 24 hours or so have been kind of a blur. Nothing really astonishing happened, but I've been having trouble sleeping again, so I've just been sleeping for short amounts of time, in random intervals...it makes time fly by...in slow motion. I spent some more time last night watching Graham Norton on you.tube, which made me [laugh] so hard that I was crying at the same time. lol

I drove Mark to work this morning, then went to Meijer where I bought food, eyeliner, socks, underwear, condoms, razors, batteries, bodywash, after-shave & fingernail polish remover. I may go to Middler-Earth later to check out their shirts, but I might just stay home and do some cleaning...or sleep. I'd like to get some props and stuff for pictures, as I'd really like to get on with that stuff, but I'm not sure what I need exactly. I'd like to get my ears pierced, but the way I want it done, I wouldn't be able to wear my warm winter hat until next fall. lol Which would be very, very cold. Brrrrrr.

We'll see what happens.

And why am I so fucking horny?

   posted by Bald Jason at 10:31 AM
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   Thursday, March 8, 2007

I slept most of the day, which was fantastic after not getting much sleep the last few days. I've been cleaning the condo since I woke up. I'm doing laundry, washing the dishes, cleaning my room... I misplaced my midrin somewhere the other day and I'm trying find it, but so far...nothing. I'm wondering if I didn't leave it at work Sunday night? Hm.

I haven't really gotten much reading done the last few days. I hope I get back into my books soon; I liked that I was getting so much reading done...

Anyways; I need to get back to it.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:21 PM
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   Friday, March 9, 2007

Mark is asleep in his bed for the first time in months; I so rock! Now if only my stomach would agree with that assessment. I just took a bath, which sometimes helps calm my stomach down; hopefully it works, because I would like to get some sleep before going to work today.

I finally saw the latest L Word and it was really enjoyable. They're keeping this season light, and not dragging out any of the stories that could be really depressing, which is nice for a change. There are still serious storylines, but it's very different, tone wise, from previous seasons. It's refreshing, but I hope it gets a little more darkness before the end of the series; whenever that is.

I chatted on gay.com yesterday evening, with a group of men from across the country. It was cool. It's sometimes nice to check and see what's going on outside of my little part of the world. I think I may have made a few friends; I know I at least picked up a few fans. Some of them were stunning, and some of them were brilliant, and brave & breathtaking. It was a lot of fun.

I never found my Midrin. That's like a whole bottle gone. What the fuck happened to it? I should try to get a refill, but I just got that one, and I don't them to think I'm selling it, or that I'm a junkie or something. Erg. I worry too much.

I burnt my hand on the stove last night. I'm not happy about that. I cut my big toe open on my desk yesterday. My week bordered on horrible, but I somehow managed to keep a smile on my face, which I'm proud of. Sometimes that's all you can do, isn't it?

I hope Mollie is feeling better. What if I have the flu now? That would suck. I'm hoping it's just my usual trauma. I should call Mollie soon.

I called Jeremy earlier in the week; Monday I think. I left him a message saying a had most of the week off, and if he wanted to drop by and return my DS9 discs for the next set, that he could just leave me a message letting me know when. He didn't call or drop by. I hope he's ok. Things were really stressful for him last time that we spoke. I'll keep trying to get ahold of him.

I'm going to see if I can sleep now. That would be great.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:31 AM
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I don't think I'm going to be getting any sleep. It's possible I have the flu. I'm not sure. It's hard to tell what's going on with my body from moment to moment. If I feel better soon, that would be nice. If I don't, I may have to call in. I really don't want to though. I'm exhausted, and I think I'm starting to get dehyrdated, which between you & me, is my least favorite sensation ever. seriously. I think I might make myself some soup. Something that won't kill me when it comes back up. Ugh.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:13 AM
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   Saturday, March 10, 2007

I got 2 hours of sleep before work, but my work day went by without anything terrible happening. I felt a lot better as the day went on. I picked Mark up after work and we went to CompUSA which is going out of business; we didn't find anything we wanted though, and I was getting a killer headache. Mark had called in the refill for the Midrin that I had lost, so we went to Meijer where I got my pills, and Mark got a case for his cds. I took my pills in the car. We went back to CompUSA to look around again, but I really wanted to go home, so we left.

The Midrin hit fast and hard, and left me feeling pain free! It was perfect as far as medication goes. It hasn't been working that well lately, so I was shocked. I took a nap, took a shower, talked to Mollie on the phone, before finally deciding that I would go to Necto. I had to told this guy Rex that I'd try to make it there.

After I left, I stopped at Aut Bar briefly, then went to find a parking space for Necto. When I found a space, a block away, I went to the ATM to get cash, but it was down. The girl that sometimes works the door often lets me in for free, but there was a huge line to get into the bar, so I didn't want to risk waiting in line, just to find out that I had to go get some money to get in. I went to my bank, across town, but the ATM was down there too. I went to Mark's bank, and got some cash out that he was going to pay me on Sunday anyways, which hopefully he'll not be pissed that I got out early. Then I headed back, where I got the same parking space, walked to the bar, where there was no line now, only find that I'd left my wallet in the car! lol I walked back and got it, and finally got into the bar (for free after all), then I never did run into the boy that I went there to see.

I did run into Christopher again. I met this boy Christiopher there in January; really hot goth looking boy. I got his number this time for sure; I fucked it up last time. But I was concentrating so hard on getting his number that I didn't thank his friends who kept complimenting me, so I felt like an asshole later. Hopefully I'll see them again, so I can tell them I was just worried that I'd screw up his phone # again.

I met this 40yo guy named Casey, from Columbus, Ohio, who was visiting friends. There was some strong chemistry there; I gave him a great kiss goodnight.

Erica, who used to work at Benny's Bakery was there. I guess Benny finally retired. I met her friends Nick (who looked 12, but is like 25), and Johnny (who is 22, smokes, has ben OUT for all of 5 minutes, and doesn't date boys or girls). Johnny said he recognized me from Factory Night, and he hit on me. I was very flattered, but the whole smoking thing, combined with his newly out status, and his not dating boys thing just added up to me not being interested. I think that Douglas was into him though, and I later saw them together, so maybe they'll hook up; they probably have a lot more in common anyways. I later went to say goodnight to Erica and found her on the dancefloor with Nick, so I danced with him, on her. Nick isn't all that cute, but he gave me the best lap dance ever. lol I was oozing. lol He seemed really nice. It was good to see Erica and meet her friends. She was actually dancing with another friend when I said goodnight, and he was so hot!

I know I saw other people that I knew there, but the night is kind of a blur now. I'm surprise I remember as much of it as I do. I had a good time though. And that's all that matters.

When I got home, I left Christopher a message. One of his guy friends, who was outside with him when I said goodbye...I had met him in the bar, and he was a cutie too. I was attracted to so many people. But I was extra excited to see Chris again. He seems to have some kind of speech problem, but it doesn't detract from him in way at all! He just...he's hot.

I ate. I read my e-mail, including one from this great guy named Jeremy who I chatted with Thursday night, who lives in Palm Springs with is husband Shawn. I really liked the e-mail, and we're going to try to be long distance friends. Cool.

I need to take a shower, though I'm exhausted. I got this new eyeliner the other day, and I love it, but I should get it off my eyeballs before I go to sleep. Maybe after the shower I'll respond to Jeremy's message.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:21 AM
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