Bald Jason's Musings
Sunday, August 2, 2009
I did a bunch of stuff after the last entry. More discs. Took a nap. Read. Ate. Talked to Michael on the phone. He was coming over, and then Mark wanted to go to Meijer for this sale, and I needed some stuff for my pasta and shakes, so we ran to Meijer and then met Michael at the house. We chatted a bit, but went to bed soon after. I had a bit of a headache, and it took me long while to get to sleep. I woke up early but stayed in bed with Michael to cuddle. Later after snoozing a bit I woke up with a bit of a sore throat and my stomach was cramped. Michael left to work on his yard and pack some stuff. He's coming back tomorrow night. I'm trying to work through the stomach pain. My bathwater should be ready about now.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:22 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
I just finished my book, which brought the recent Mirror Universe storyline to a satisfying close. There were several lesbian characters in the book; yay! There was lots of continuity between this book and previous volumes, and the series that spawned them, so that was another big plus. The ending of the book tied this Mirror Universe detour into the building story of the Ascendants, which was a neat twist, though it will be interesting to see what the twist ending will mean to further volumes. A very enjoyable read. I was shocked by several plot twists, and enjoyed the symmetry of the closure for several characters. There were only 2 things I didn't like. 1 was that we didn't learn what happened between Kira and the Prophets, but that could come up in a later book. 2nd was that the twist ending, while cool, is somewhat annoying in that we most likely won't be seeing a followup to this story unitl 2011 at the earliest. :-0( Though there will be a new DS9 book next month, and several DS9 themed books next year.
posted by Bald Jason at 05:04 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
I had too much to eat earlier, and had forgotten to take my 2nd prilosec; a terrible combination. My stomach is not at all happy.
I'm still burning discs. I just read the first 30 pages of "the Garak book", as I've decided it's time to reread the DS9 Relaunch books. But the books are making me ache to see the entire series again. Perhaps I'll start that now. It will be a good to see all the old episodes again. It's been nearly 16 years since DS9 first aired. Amazing.
I'm tired.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:48 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
Monday, August 3, 2009
One of my favorite authors has this blog, and since reading it I've found that we had a lot of odd, random connections. I'm not stalking her or anything...I don't comment, and I don't say "hey, we have a lot in common" cause I don't want to bother her. I just want to enjoy her writing. But it's not uncommon for me to say something to my roomie, and then a few days later see the same thing said in her blog. It's become kind of a joke between us.
One week ago today I posted about a happy memory with Jeremy with a link in that entry to an older entry, in which I mentioned that I was "Fade Into You" by Mazzy Star stuck in my head. In the new entry I put that in the 'currently listening to' section. I posted about it on Facebook. Then yesterday in her blog she posted the video to the song, saying it was stuck in her head. Nice.
She also posted the Belly video for "Feed the Tree" the other day. I still own that CD. I bought it when it was new, but she apparently liked it way more than I did. I still love that song though. AND the only other song on the CD that I did like was "Low Red Moon", which should used as the title for one of her books. When I first read the title, I thought of that song, and then sure enough, that's where it was from. A lot of her stuff is connected to music I love. It's probably something that lots of people share with her; I'm not suggesting we some special connection or anything...it just amuses me. lol
posted by Bald Jason at 09:32 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
I finished working on my Facebook farm yesterday; my friends & I now live in a giant Farm Town mansion! Later, Michael joined me. We had amazing sex. 3 Times. Then lots of serious chats, with LOTS of emotion; it wasn't exactly fun, but it was important, and I so glad we had that communication. We went to Pizza House, and in the spirit of trying new things, I had a Raspberry Daiquiri, which was interesting, though I'm not a big drinker. I also bought some Chipati(?) sauce for home use.
Michael got me to open the present he got brought me this weekend; it was the Director's Cut of Watchmen. I want to see it. Mark says he really liked the theatrical version. But I want to watch the Motion Comic first. I have to wait until after my birthday party for that because someone might buy it for me, which is going to drive me crazy, with this sitting on my shelf.
Michael & cuddled most of the night. It was great. It was a really good night for us I think. We're leaving for Sandusky tomorrow. We'll be staying in a hotel 6 miles from Cedar Point, and might go to the park tomorrow, but we'll be there all day on Thursday. So will my sister Janice and her family, which rocks. The kids don't know though. She's gonna call me about half way through the day and have me surprise them; that way I get alone time with Micahel and the kids get time with their dad before Uncle Jason takes the stage. ;-0)
Then we're all coming home on Friday. Janice & company are staying at a Holiday Inn like 30 miles from the park so it's unlikely that I'll see them after we leave the park.
I need to do my laundry and pack today. I'm back on fritos and cookies to save my stomach from any troubles...but oddly enough, I no longer find them all that apppealing. The fritos and really saulty and greasy and the cookies are like...like something that would survive WWIII for us to snack on. I don't know. That's probably a really good thing, because I'm embracing all this other food, but it kind of sucks, because this is what I have to eat the next 3 days. Or at the very least, the next 2.
Michael is laying on my bed. He just commented that I'm writing a lot, but I don't think I am. lol. I'm gonna go spend more time with my boyfriend.
Michael has an appointment at 2. Mark has to be at work at 2.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:59 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [2 Comments]
It's been confirmed that there will be a gay male character on Caprica (and he sounds very interesting), while there was some footage in the pilot (which I assume will be cut for television) which demonstrated that lesbians are in existance as well. This is good to hear. There were gay / bi / lesbian characters on BSG but you had to either pick up on signals or watch extras ("BSG: Razor", "BSG: The Face of the Enemy") to really get that you weren't just imagining stuff. We had Admiral Cain who was apparently a lesbian, involved with Gina Iviere (a Cylon model Six). We had Felix Gaeta who was apparently bi, involved with a Cylon model Eight, and later Louis Hoshi (who may be gay or bi; we don't know enough about him to know which). Gaeta is a fairly big character through the show. It's implied that he had an infatuation with and a possible offscreen encounter with Gaius Baltar. Hoshi is introduced in Season 2, and keeps a low profile through much of the show, though he has some nice moments at the end. Caprica Six, Baltar & D'Anna (a Cylon model Three) have a 3-way relationship though it's unknown how that works exactly. We've seen two Six's kiss on the mouth before one of them killed the other (a very complex scene that seemed to move beyond the gender of those involved IMO). There are some guys standing close together in "A Disquiet Follows My Soul" though people interpret this differently, and basically see what they want to see. Some LGBT fans of the series were upset that the LGBT stuff wasn't more prominant, but from my perspective it was enough; they didn't have to include any, and the characters we did get were mostly, extremely complex. Caprica sounds like it's going to continue this, with possibly even more blatant content, and that sounds really interesting to me, when I would have been watching the show anyways.
posted by Bald Jason at 06:17 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
I was worried earlier about our trip to Cedar Point, but I feel a lot calmer now. Maybe because Michael gave me a nice back rub, or maybe because I slept a little, or maybe because I had some tea. I don't know why. I was tempted to take some of my Midrin earlier when I was uber stressed, but it didn't come to that. We have the directions printed. I'm mostly packed I think. I have enough clothes I think, though I keep thinking of things to bring. I feel ok about the trip now. Hopefully it goes well.
I forgot to mention that I got to visit an old friend yesterday. Varian Waller and I used to work together at Meijer from July 1996-August 1998. For years after I left I'd go visit her at work and talk for hours; often about Star Trek or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Then she was gone and I had no way of contacting her. Another friend of ours, Karen Edwards ran into Varian at her latest job, and gave me the heads up. I've tried to visit her twice before but she was on medical leave, having some serious GI troubles (which I can relate to), but I finally got to see her today. She still lives with her brother, who's not doing so well; she's a meat eater; she loved the new Star Trek movie; she thinks my boyfriend is cute and was happy to hear all the news about Mark, Mollie & Carrie. It was a good time, but very short as she was busy with clients. I have her phone # in my phone now though and I need to find time to call her. Maybe I could invite her to my party. Then she could see Mollie and Michael and Mark, and meet some other friends? It's a thought.
Ooh. The new Dune & Kiernan books came out today. I'd have had them preordered, but they're on my wishlist so I've been forbidden until after the party. ;-0)
Mark's friend from work gave him a copy of the Motion Comic that was free to download a long while back. I watched a bit of it; it's very interesting. I think Mark will enjoy it. I kind of want to follow along with the graphic novel while I watch it. lol. Or possibly read a chapter, then watch the movtion comic version. Then when I'm done, watch the movie. That's what I'm considering doing now. The grapic novel isn't on my wishlist, so I could order that with no problem. I'd like to own the Motion Comic on dvd too, as I'm sure the picture would be better, and there are probably some other cool things, but that's on my wishlist too. Damn it. lol
posted by Bald Jason at 11:24 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
I just ordered the Watchmen graphic novel, and the most recent Doctor Who Christmas Special (which comes out on DVD this Fall). Michael been asleep a few hours now. I'll join him soon I think. I just want to chill for a bit and make sure I have everything. I might shave and shower just before bed.
Michael has been watching Superman: The Animated Series lately. I catch bits of it when he's watching it; makes me remember how good it is. Some of my friends that like the shows dislike Superman, but I think it's actually very dark in places, and it's integral to the rest of the universe with crossovers to Batman & Static Shock & Batman Beyond - and introducing tons of characters for Justice Leauge & Justice League Unlimited. It's one of the DCAU shows that actually makes sense when you watch it in the order it aired. I'd change the order of 1 installment, but even without that change it makes sense. I've worked out in my DCAU guide what year each of the installments air and what # episode they are in the grand scheme of the entire DCAU (save for 1, which is the final chronological episode of the entire DCAU).
I'm going to list them here because it will calm me down and I think it's fun, I'm sure this doesn't interest anyone else so feel free to skip it. If you do find it at all interesting the first # is the number overall (all DCAU series in chronological order); the 2nd # is the boxed set you'll find it in and the next number is the episode # in that set. So like this:
088 1x01 The Last Son of Krypton 1
88th episode overall. Boxed Set 1, episode 01. Got it? Ok. Here goes.
1996:
088 1x01 The Last Son of Krypton, Part I
089 1x02 The Last Son of Krypton, Part II
090 1x03 The Last Son of Krypton, Part III
091 1x04 Fun and Games
092 1x05 A Little Piece of Home
093 1x06 Feeding Time
094 1x07 The Way of All Flesh
095 1x08 Stolen Memories
096 1x09 The Main Man, Part I
097 1x10 The Main Man, Part II
098 1x11 My Girl
099 1x12 Tools of the Trade
100 1x13 Two's a Crowd
101 1x14 The Prometheon
102 1x15 Blasts From the Past, Part I
103 1x16 Blasts From the Past, Part II
104 1x17 Livewire
105 1x18 Speed Demons
In 1997 & 1998 (the years the episodes take place in) Superman & Batman have their own shows and adventures that sometimes crossover - only the Superman episodes are listed here.
1997:
107 2x01 Identity Crisis
109 2x02 Target
111 2x03 Action Figures
113 2x04 Mxyzpixilated
115 2x05 Double Dose
117 2x06 Solar Power
119 2x13 Father's Day
121 2x07 Monkey Fun
123 2x08 Brave New Metropolis
125 2x09 Ghost in the Machine
126 2x10 World's Finest, Part I
127 2x11 World's Finest, Part II
128 2x12 World's Finest, Part III
129 2x14 The Hand of Fate
131 2x15 Biazrro's World
133 2x16 Prototype1998:
135 2x17 The Late Mr. Kent
137 2x18 Heavy Metal
139 3x01 Warrior Queen
141 3x02 Apokolips...Now! Part I
142 3x03 Apokolips...Now! Part II
144 3x04 Little Girl Lost, Part I
145 3x05 Little Girl Lost, Part II
147 3x06 Where There's Smoke
148 3x07 Knight Time
149 3x09 Obsession
151 3x10 Little Big Head Man
153 3x11 Absolute Power
155 3x12 In Brightest Day
157 3x13 Superman's Pal
159 3x14 Fish Story
161 3x15 Unity
162 3x16 The Demon Reborn
163 3x17 Legacy, Part I
164 3x18 Legacy, Part II2979:
3x08 New Kids in Town
Nifty. I'm such a geek!
Mark just got home. I need to tell him some Watchmen related stuff, and see if he has a toothbrush I can use.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:51 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [2 Comments]
I didn't go to Cedar Point with Michael and his friends today. I couldn't sleep last night; I just couldn't shut my brain off, and I was struggling through this massive panic attack. I was shaking and stressed out and it tied into my eating. My sister, who is tied into my eating disorder will be there at the park tomorrow. The last time I went to Cedar Point is when my stomach became paralyized. So tomorrow would see me facing some HUGE things in relation to my eating. I couldn't bring myself to eat anything and I was wigging out.
Michael did not take this well. He seems to have chilled since. Mark has been supportive. Michael has been supportive, but I disappointed him. If Mark can get tomorrow off of work he's going to drive us down and stay the day at Cedar Point with us, but if he can't he'll just drive me down there and drop me off at Michael's hotel. So I am still going (that's the plan). I just have to chill until then.
I'm thinking about going into therapy for my eating. I've been making really big strides in a lot of areas but it's happening so fast and my psyche is having trouble keeping pace. I've had 2 really big scary panic attacks in relation to all this; perhaps there's a medication for those? I don't know. But they really freak me out.
This didn't prevent me from getting still more new food stuffs to try today. I picked up some Romain Lettice Leaves...some Pecans (which Michael told me he likes, and which I've never had), and some Almond Milk - which is a non-dairy milk type stuff that I thought I could use in my shakes instead of Boost.
Mark took me to LC and they messed up Mark's order, only they didn't realize this until after we left, and Mark didn't notice until he was at work already; it was so bad he couldn't eat it. I called LC and set him up with a free replacement the next time he stops in. I guess we should have checked it when we were there. That's happened to me before too, and I used to always check my food but I've stopped doing it all the time. I feel responsible for not doublechecking his stuff.
I'm tempted to watch Watchmen as it's sitting right in front of me. Perhaps I will. I don't know.
posted by Bald Jason at 02:52 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [3 Comments]
I put in the Watchmen disc; looked at the opening menu, and then put it back in it's case. I want to watch it, but it's something I want to build toward by reading the graphic novel and watching the motion comic. The extra extended version comes out in December; a 5 disc set. If I like the movie I'll look into getting that on bluray. Until I watch it I'll put it on my LGBT Inclusive DVD shelf. There. It fits in great there. Another comic-book themed movie to + to my LGBT genres. V for Vendetta is on there as well.
I'm bored.
Maybe I'll work on my DCAU page.
Maybe I'll read more of the Garak book. I'm planning on rereading the entire DS9 Relaunch, and make note of all the LGBT stuff this time around for a LGBT inclusive Trek page I'm working on.
posted by Bald Jason at 02:59 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
I did end up working on my DCAU pages. I finally finished my DCAU: 1992 page, which lists the episodes that I think take place in that year and why and all that. I also did some major work on my DCAU Timeline page, and started a DCAU 1993 page as well. My years of work are finally starting to pay off on this project. ;-0)
posted by Bald Jason at 09:00 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
Thursday, August 6, 2009
I got some sleep last night. We have to leave in about an hour; I just woke up; Mark is still asleep. It's chilly in my room; I should get dressed. I made sure I got some sleep last night; I wore my earplugs and took some Tylenol PM. For a long while I didn't think they would work, but they did in the end. I feel far less stressed today than I did yesterday. Oh. And I tried Pecans last night; I like them! ;-0)
posted by Bald Jason at 07:04 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
I was wrong; we were supposed to leave at 7am! Mark had his clock set for 6pm on accident. We have to go!!! lol. It never rains but it pours.
posted by Bald Jason at 07:29 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
Friday, August 7, 2009
Mark & I made it out to the hotel that Michael & his friends were staying at. We all made it to the park around 10:30am I'm guessing. We rode the Raptor right away; 45 minute wait; got a cute dvd of me & Michael holding hands on the ride. We rode Ocean Motion. I hooked up with Janice & the kids while Michael went with his friends (lots of drama ensuing - but it all worked out in the end so I'd rather not rehash it all here); I had a small something to nibble on before that became a problem. I chilled with the family, then Justin, Jordan, Jerry & I rode the Blue Streak; I sat with Jordan. Later I caught up with Michael & company. I rode the Witch's Wheel by myself, then rode in the 2nd seat of the Magnum with Michael; front seat of Gemini & Mine Ride. Rode the Swings. Met back up with Janice and rode the Iron Dragon in the front seat with my youngest nephew Jonathan (who screamed how much he loved it), then rode the Magnum front seat with Justin, and the Raptor with Justin / Jordan & Mark. Janice & crew were leaving soon so we left them (after I had an amazing Blue Raspberry Icey thing). I was having trouble breathing and Mark noticed that I'd been stung by something right above my right eye so we went to First Aid where they gave me some meds after checking me out, which helped. Michael & everyone joined us and we rode the Raptor again. We ate some elephant ear, drank more icey (which Michael got me); also got a Raptor shirt and some bling. And that was it. It was fun. The rides were fun. I didn't ride anything new; I would have but the lines for Millennium Force & Maverick were both over 2 hours and I didn't want to wait that long. Back to the hotel...I stayed with Michael and Mark drove home (though there was an open bed that he could have used). Showered. Slept. Showered. Dressed and left. Nice car ride back. With Michael's friend Jen & I talking about gender identity. Home. Mark. News. This. A good trip. My tummy troubles were there, but they weren't as problematic as they could have been and I was very careful. There was about half a day of drama but I didn't let it get to me and managed to have a great time. And though the rides are fun, and I'm not ruling out future trips to the park, I find the idea of rides kind of pointless these days, and not necessarily 'worth it'. It's more about the company you're keeping I think.
I just found a BSG: The Plan interview clip which said we'll find out who left the note for Adama explaining that there are 12 Cylon models. I always just assumed it was Baltar, though I've known lots of people who have questioned who it was. Glad we're getting answers to some questions. As it stands The Plan should tie into several great BSG episodes:
Tied into the Miniseries, how 'The Fall' was planned and carried out; who did Caprica Six meet? Who left the note about there being 12 models?
I'm hoping we'll also see whoever planted the Cylon Transponder discovered in the miniseries.
There's at least 1 scene set during "33", between Ellen & Cavil.
There seems to be a scene set during "Water".
There's a scene setting up the opening of "Litums".
Scenes set before & after (and possibly during) "Six Degrees of Separation" explaining why Shelly Godfrey was on Galactica and how she escaped.
Ellen's introduction in "Tigh Me Up, Tigh Me Down" will be set up.
There's a scene between Boomer & Cavil set in Galactica's brig, so between "Scattered" (2x01) & "Resistance" (2x04).
The introduction of Anders ("Resistance") & Tory ("The Captain's Hand") will be set up, as will the introduction to Tigh.
It's possible the cut scenes from Daybreak which relate to the intro of Boomer will be included.
Cavil's introduction in "Lay Down Your Burdens, Part 1" will be set up, and his airlock scene in "Lay Down Your Burdens, Part 2" (only ever spoken of) will most likely be seen.
All Good Things!
The cover art was also released; you can see it below:
posted by Bald Jason at 03:46 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [2 Comments]
Mark & I went to GameStop; we traded in 3 games (including Zelda) for 24.99 or something like that; used that towards a new copy of Mario Party 8. I bought the latest(?) Spyro game; I didn't even know you could play Spyro on the Wii! ;-0)
Then we hit the storage place for boxes; K-Mart for underwear, the bank, Rite Aid for Prilosec, and LC for food. My Watchmen graphic novel arrived (along with Michael's very late birthday presents), and I'm excited to read it and watch the motion comic.
Michael wanted me to call him when I wasn't busy, and I did while we were out and about and I had 20 minutes or so to myself (because I didn't go into the storage place or K-Mart) but he didn't answer. I'll try again now.
Mollie will be here in less than a week!!!
posted by Bald Jason at 07:56 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
I got ahold of Michael. He'd gone shopping and forgotten his phone. He bought like 4 tv on dvd boxed sets...maybe more. He's a collector. He bought me a D.C. thing (the Green Lantern movie) but it's not connected to the DCAU that I collect and he doesn't mind returning it. I might go to a cousin's birthday party with him tomorrow (his cousin, not mine). Even if I don't, he's probably spending the night tomorrow, which would be nice.
I read a bit of Watchmen; the art and the animated comic are pretty straight on - it's really cool. I showed a comparison of them to Mark so he could give his opinion, and he deemed it: cool. He's trying to get me a better versiono of the animated one though. I'm very excited about reading Watchmen tonight, though I'm already missing Garak. I'll get back to him soon. ;-0)
I just took a break from this entry and talked to Mark about roller coasters, Watchmen, cleaning his room (which he plans to do this weekend), and my plans with Michael. It was nice. I also had a really cool conversation with Mollie earlier; can't remember if I mentioned that before. I'm kind of sleepy. I might try those Wii games while I'm waiting for the motion comic to boot up...or not.
I know that one of the gifts that Michael is giving me is "Paul of Dune" and I'm looking forward to reading that as well.
posted by Bald Jason at 09:15 PM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Just woke up. I could probably go right back to sleep. I had good dreams. Those odd crazy dreams that I love so much. No point and going over them now...but they were good.
I didn't get to read much Watchmen last night as Michael and I had a long phone conversation in which we both cried and laughed and yelled and I'm not sure we're going to survive much longer. I don't want it to end, but he's crazy jealous of Mark. He's upset that Mark was at Cedar Point, but I asked if Mark could come (as he'd already driven me to Sandusky Ohio and it didn't seem fair to just have him leave, though Mark had no problem with going) and he said it was fine - only he was lying, so as not to be rude. Because lying isn't rude apparently. He's mad that I asked Mark (who was closer to me and had sunblock on his hands) to put sunblock on my back (which to both Mark & I is completely non-sexual act), even though, before Mark did so, I offered the job to Michael (which he refused on the grounds that I had asked Mark first) - but he says he was forced to watch Mark "feel me up" when he'd just turned down the job himself. He thinks Mark is in love with me. He thinks the reason Mark is always looking at me is because Mark is head over heels in love with me. He thinks the reason Mark has pictures of him & I on his myspace page is because he's in love with me. He feels like Mark & I should be together and he's not good enough for me. I don't think any of that is accurate. I think Mark & I have a very special relationship that transcends that bullshit, and Michael is a very jealous person who wants me to be all his all of the time, and I am. I'm his boyfriend. We sleep in the same bed. We have sex. We laugh and talk. I tell him things I've never told anyone before (like the fact that I hate surprise parties and why I hate them - and then he tries to throw me one. Or I tell him I had a suicidal thought during a spaz attack, not having told anyone else, and he yells at me for not telling him sooner) But he doesn't see it that way because the closest friend I've ever had just happened to have sex with me YEARS ago. Mark is jealous of Michael because if things between Mark & I had been different we could be a couple - but they weren't and they never will be and he accepts that. I understand that because I've experienced that with more than one ex-bf and it didn't mean I was in love with them anymore, it just meant that I saw what they had and recognized that that's something I could have had with them and that made me jealous. Michael is jealous of Mark because he sees him as a threat (I think), that maybe Mark & I have the closeness that Michael wants us to have right now - and that's impossible. That kind of closeness takes a long time, and Michael and I can totally make it there if he just chills...but the reverse isn't true for Mark - he and I will never be together as a couple ever again. We've both acknowledged that and discussed that many times. We are affectionate though, and it's just something that we don't think about because we've been so much to each other. We used to shower together (completely non-sexual) but that bothered Michael so I stopped and I was ok with that. Apparently Mark rubbed my shoulders one day and gave me a kiss (like you would give your grandma) and this really upset Michael (only he's just telling me now) and I'm sure it was something Mark and I didn't think of as anything at all, and if he'd said something at the time we would have apologised; we weren't trying to flaunt anything or disrespect him. I told Michael I'd talk to Mark about limiting our affectionate kisses in the future; that our touching would be reduced... But I'm not sure this will change the core of this. I mean...I don't like to go out. I just don't. And Michael wants to go for a walk sometime and I don't. And then the one day I feel like walking, Michael isn't here (because he's not here 24/7) and Mark is and he walks with me, and this translates to Michael as that I'd rather walk with Mark than him - when what it really means is that when I wanted to walk I did, and when I didn't want to walk I didn't. And that's all it means. It doesn't have anything to do with Mark. It doesn't have anything to do with Michael. And if Michael had been around he could have walked with me, and if Mark didn't want to go I'd have walked by myself. I just wonder what the next thing to bother Michael will be... Because I don't think he believes me when I tell him the Mark / Jason couple has been forever severed. I will not abandon Mark. He's closer than family and friend; that's something rare and something to be treasured and I know that. But I'm not complete with him. And while I'd be fine on my own I want a partner that can complete aspects of me that Mark can't. I want a boyfriend; a lover and confidante and a partner. Someone who understands me. And if that someone could understand that Mark isn't a threat to them in any way at all - that would be really cool.
My phone is dead and I don't know where my phone charger is.
It's raining.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:03 AM
[Karma: 0 (+/-)] [1 Comments]