Sunday, September 13, 2009

I slept for a little over eight hours! Shortly after waking, I noticed some texts from Michael and replied. Then we traded texts and eventually moved on to AIM. The conversation was intense; dramatic; worrysome. I want him to be ok.

Later I worked on getting over a lot of the stuff that's been going on. That's sounds weird...but I'm sort of working on this exercise that I know will give me some peace. I'm guessing it will take me a few weeks but then I can file it away and not worry about it.

My appetite is back. My sanity is back. Things are still touch and go, and I'm very afraid I might have been exposed to an STD, but aside from that I'm improving. Things that interested me are starting to interest me again, and the world doesn't always seem so pointless.

I'll take a shower, and get dressed. Maybe make something to eat. I should try to get back to my book as well. Or maybe the DCAU thing. Not sure. I just want things to be back to normal.

And I know this is a controversial thing, but I want Michael to be part of that... The only probablem with that, is Michael himself. He wants to go back to what we had before (without the sex) and part of that sounds very appealing. But I also know I have serious pain and trauma to work through...and I don't want to send mixed signals or confuse things...though I have a lot of mixed signals to deal with.

I want him back.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:30 AM
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