Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Stayed up a long time after the last entry; not getting to bed until after 8am. I chatted with a guy named Seth for several hours. I'm grateful for the people I've met in this time, who aren't freaked out that I'm not looking to hook up. He was funny, and kind, though we had some philosophical differences, but we were civil about them. A good way to end the morning.

I've had some strange urges lately. Just odd rushes of emotion that probably lots of people go through at times like these. I've discussed them with Mark and he's been very supportive...reassuring me that if I'm not hurting anyone that I shouldn't feel bad for following certain impulses...unless they're self destructive. I'm not certain how to quantify them. It's complicated. Everything seems so complicated now that I'm constantly trying to simply things to keep me sane. That's why I'm not having sex; because sex tends to complicate things. That's why I'm trying to concentrate on the little things. Just making it through the day.

I slept until around 2pm I think. I posted some stuff on Facebook. Traded texts with Shawn; he had fun yesterday. I texted with Michael, which was pretty...cold but not rude. I'd called him last night too and it was the same thing; like there's a wall there that wasn't before. If he needs that wall to get through this then I guess it's ok...I just hope it won't always be there.

I had a shake, which was too big, and I'm having to not do much now because of it. I'd have loved to have gone for another walk today, but I'm running out of time now.

Mike Anderson dropped by for a vist to return some Doctor Who DVDs and get the last of my Star Wars Books, plus some Doctor Who dvds I burnt for him. It was great to see him; he was maybe here for a half hour, but it was fun.

I watched the new episode of 'The Closer'; it was pretty good, and I'm enjoying this season more than the previous one.

I'm feeling slightly off today. After Sunday & Monday turned out so great...today has been a slight disappointment...I think because of all the emotional stuff I'm trying to process today. It's rough territory. I hope I get it all sorted out soon.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:31 PM
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