Friday, February 29, 2008

Today is starting to suck.

Mark waited to shower with me, so we could leave. We do that sometimes; the showering thing. I can't express to you enough how non-sexual this is after so many years living together. We're naked around each other all the time, and simply don't see each other that way, if that makes any sense... It's just not a big deal. It's like having a conversation at public shower. Only that's probably slightly more sexual now that I think about it. lol

Anyways, Mark was asking me if I wanted to go see his sister-in-law and nephews after work, and I told him again that I wouldn't know until after work because I don't like to plan things cause (sadly) my ability to keep down food can switch on a dime. As if to demonstrate this, he started lightly badgering me for an answer, which upset me, and then I got sick. I'm super sensitive about my condition, and when people pressure me about the way I don't plan stuff and why it makes me feel damaged and crazy and insecure...and then all those things upset my stomach, and it's always bad. Mark saw this right off and apologised, but the damage was done. Now I'm sick to my stomach, and Mark can't be late for his meeting, so now I'm stuck without a ride to work...with no real desire to get dressed and have anything touch my stomach. And assuming I get in there somehow, and my stomach calms down, I won't have the car to get any lunch. Pretty much all my planning (which wasn't all that to begin with) has been decimated by one little conversation.

How pathetic am I?

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:43 PM
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