Sunday, March 11, 2007

Saturday I slept, and then finished the new Enterprise book, which seems like a great beginning to a 5th season of Enterprise. Very cool. I look forward to the next installment. I'll most likely read the 3rd Harry Potter book next.

I was working on my webpage around 12:30am today, and I saw that Luke/Lucas was online so I chatted with him for awhile, but he got disconnected. I called him, and we chatted some more. He saw Rent last night in Detroit; he & his friends rode in a limo, and he had a blast, but he was still lonely for a partner, as everyone else was coupled. He let me go for a minute and then called me back, and I asked him if he wanted to come over, just as he was asking me if it would be ok if he could. He said he'd be up for taking pictures, as I've been dying for some new ones, and he seemed excited about it; saying he'd even bring his tux. Well...that was over 2 hours ago, and he only lives like 40 minutes away. He's stood me up a couple of times before, but not like this. And he told me he was switching of his phone for awhile to charge it up, as he'd been on it all night, which means that when I called a few minutes ago and he didn't answer there was a perfect excuse. Ugh. If he does stand me up, I'm washing my hands of him. He talks about how he wants a really cool boyfriend, but there aren't any good ones out there - but how can he tell if he never shows the fuck up!?!

I think I'm going grocery shopping. If he gets here when I'm gone, Mark can call me, as I'll only be a couple miles away. If I just sit and wait for him, I'll have wasted even more of my time.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:07 AM
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Luke did stand me up again. And it was worse than before, because after not arriving at my house, like he said he wanted to, and not calling me to tell me why, I found him online on yahoo.messenger, and he wouldn't respond to my messages. What the fuck? So I went on gay.com to see if he was there, and he was. And again he wouldn't respond to me. There was another guy in the room though, who's had a crush on me for a long time, and I told him I was kind of upset and why. He privated Luke and said "Hey", and Luke responded to him right away!?! Then the guy tried to find out why Luke stood me up, but Luke just said that something came up and he didn't want to talk about it. Now...what could that something be, that prevented him from driving out to see me, or calling me to let me know he wouldn't be coming, or e-mailng me, or responding to my online messages, when he WAS responding to other men who were just saying hello? How could he possibly justify his behavior? His utter disregard for my feelings? His complete disrespect? I mean, he stood me up, and when I tried to talk to him about it, he went all silent while chatting it up with boys he doesn't know. Yeah. He told me when he first met me (at which point he'd stood me up once, years before) - that he desperately wants to be coupled, and that he'd given up on men, because none of them are good, and asked if I was good. I told him I tried to be good, but that was maybe for other people to decide (if I was or not). How can he find out if people are good, if he never shows up? And he doesn't just do this to me. I know for a fact that he does this to other people too. And I know he's lied to me as well. I'm done. I just don't understand him at all. Which is too bad, because if you cut out all the bullshit, he had potential. And if he stays the way he is now, the way he was years ago, he'll always be lonely, and I don't wish that on anyone; even him.

So...I did go grocery shopping last night, and I got all the fixings for milk shake, which I had a craving for. But I forgot some of the stuff that I needed! So I had to go back to the store and get it! It was cool though because I found driving around, listening to tunes kind of relaxing. When I finally got my shake though, it was truly yummy! :-0) I then continued reading Harry Potter 3, which I'd started just before heading back to the store the 2nd time, and I'm enjoying the 3rd one as much as I remembered enjoying it years ago now.

Anyways. I fell asleep in my bed, with my clothes on; exhausted. I had applied some eyeliner when I thought that Luke would be over, because we were going to take some pictures, and plus I just love to wear eyeliner, but I usualy try to wash that stuff off before I sleep - but I didn't this time, and now my eyelids are all sticky! Yuck. Oh well. It's about 3:20pm now. I work at 7pm. I'm going to shower, and eat, and maybe make a cd to listen to at work.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:17 PM
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   Tuesday, March 13, 2007

I ordered a copy of Shortbus on Sunday; it should be here by Wednesday. Later I checked at work, and we didn't get any copies so that was a good call. I look forward to seeing the movie!

Work was mostly fun Sunday night. I worked with Nate & Alex. I had Litte Casars on my lunch. When I went to pick up my pizza, I gave the crew there a new mashup cd, and it was funny to see them grooving to the music. Alan & Mike were there. Alan got a hair cut. He's a cute kid...and he gives really good hugs. lol When work got out, I headed to Club Divine and visited with Jeremy, who returned my DS9 dvds, but I have to get him the rest of the show. It was a great visit, or as great a visit as one can have with someone who's working. There was no cover though, and I got free drinks.

After I got home from work I started watching season 3 of Footballer$ Wives, and finished the entire disc that I had rented. I went to bed just after Mark left for work, and spent the day sleeping, which was nice. When I woke up, I worked on my webpage, and later my friend Corey called me. We've had a mutual crush for years, but things are only now starting to heat up. It turns out he's a huge Star Trek fan. Beyond that we are very attuned sexually, and we both find each other very attractive. Those are all good things. He had to go though, and I wanted to eat and get ready for Necto.

Before the bar, and even before Corey called, Mark offered me a job at Bitserve Systems. It would mean an extra $400.00 a month, and only about 10 hours a week; that's more than I get from Hollywood Video. I start trainging with him on Wednesday. This is good news (if I like the job) because besides having extra cash, I have something to fall back on, if I get my ear pierced and Hollywood fires me. If Mollie is reading this, I hope you've found a job by now, or are finally getting your checks; and I look forward to Harry Potter with you ;-0)

I stopped at Aut Bar on the way to Necto, and said hello to differnt bar friends. There was this hot guy upstairs, who I couldn't stop staring at. He was smoking though; I really dislike smoke. I did go up to him though and tell him I thought he was hot, which he seemed to react to. I mean, I think he had been looking at me too. It was a nice moment. I headed over to Necto.

At Necto, I was walking in just as Scott (the owner) and Joey (another old friend, who may or may not work at Necto) were on their way in, so I got in for free. I was going to use a free pass anyways, but now I can save that. Scott says he can get me a stack of free passes so I can come any night I want. Lately on Fridays this girl I know from Hollywood has let me in for free. She was working the coat check tonight, so I got that for free too, though I tipped her 2 dollars. Becky gave me 2 free drinks, and I tipped her also. I met a cute 24 yo gay boy named Jeff, but he has a long term boyfriend. His friend Heather was so cute; we had our picture taken. Heather works at Briarwood Mall. Christine & Bobby were there, and we also got pictures. I met a guy all in black vinyl named Michael; pretty sure he was straight, though he might have been bi. Danced with lots of friends. Johnny, who I met Friday was there, and I talked to him for a minute or two. It was a fun time.

After the bar, I chatted with Corey online. fun. Then I chatted on gay.com for awhile. I was going through some of the fetish rooms; complimenting people on their honest & brave pictures. Chatted with a lot of interesting people...for far too long. Now I need to shower, take my prilosec, and get some sleep before work today.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:32 AM
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   Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Didn't get much sleep Tuesday morning. Had crazy dreams! Dropped Mark off at work on the way to Hollywood. It was hot in the store, but we were mostly dead. It was an ok day, except I had this really annoying bitch of a customer. She came into the store, returning 3 dvds; one of which had the skew ripped off it, so I had to look that one up on the computer. That didn't piss me off though, because kids do that to lots of movies, and it's really not worth getting upset about. When she came up to the counter to rent some new movies, I saw that she had an account balance (late fees), and I asked her if she'd like to pay any of it. She said that when she'd come to rent movies last week, for the first time in about a year, she had asked the girl ringing her up if she had any late fees, and the girl didn't see any. Now when we open someone's account, the late fees pop up right off, but sometimes if you hit the wrong key on accident, you can skip right over them without meaning to. I explained that to the woman, and said that this is probably what happened, and that it was an easy mistake, and that I was sorry if that experience had gotten her hopes up, but she did indeed own us like $54.00 or something like that, which in the grand scheme of things, is like NOTHING. People rent from us every week that owe the store thousands of dollars. We don't judge these people, and we don't make them pay thier fees in order to rent, and as long as they're civil, it's all good. But this woman didn't see it that way. She started gettting very agitated, and starting insulting the girl that had waited on her, during her previous visit. She said the salesperson didn't know what she was talking about, that she was incompetent, that she wanted the girl's name, and she wanted her written up. I had already explained that the mistake was most likely not intentional, and that it was something that anyone could have done, but she just kept raising her voice. I refused to give her the name of the person that waited on her; saying that the schedule for last week wasn't available and there was no way for me to look it up - both of which are true, but I also knew who it was that had handled this person before, and wasn't about to sell her out to someone who was obviously a total bitch. Then the woman changed her tune, and said that she didn't believe that she owed any of that money, because she hadn't rented in 'over a year'. I brought the fees back up, and she was right, the latest fee was indeed from nearly a year ago. She didn't like that either. She said that if she owed us any money at all, she would have remembered it. I was shaking at this point, trying not to lose my temper, or yell at her, and ask her to leave... But I asked her...if she knew that she didn't owe us anything (because she would remember it if she had) then WHY did she ask the girl last week, if she had any fees? Because...you know, that seems like a contradiction to me. Then she exploded. Saying that I had always been so nice to her in the past, and why was I being like this now? I told her that in the past she hadn't blown up at any of us over a simple mistake, or insulted my coworkers, or yelled at me, while contradicting herself, and blaming us for fees on her account, that don't just magically appear on peoples' accounts. She left just after that, but I was shaking so hard that I couldn't get her credit card slip in my drawer, and had to go walk off the anger. I called Janice and told her about it, then came back to work, where I explained what happened to Bryan in more detail, as he'd only heard a bit of it, and he had her account flagged. I was calm by then, and the rest of my shift was fine, and I refused to let the scene stess me out, which I'm very glad of.

I picked Mark up after work. I talked to my little sis, and my mother on the phone for awhile. My lil sis is wearing a white leather dress at her wedding. Her "Indian" wedding - which everytime I hear, makes me think about people from India - but they mean Native Americans. I irks me. Maybe because I've lived with a Native American for so long. I told mom I'd like to take her and my sisters to a Detroit Tigers Game this summer sometime.

Later, I talked to Corey on the phone, which was nice. Then I took a nap. And then chatted with him online, and then the phone again. He's a lot of fun; very sexy, and I'm enjoying our getting to know each other moments. ;-0)

I start training for my job at Bitserve Systems today. I'm really wired though, and can't seem to sleep. Probably because Mark had the heat on earlier, and now it's sweltering in my room. I'll turn the AC on when I'm done writing this.

I might hang out with Wendy, Friday night, but that hasn't been confirmed. Corey might come hang out with us too, as we're both free on Saturday. I have to Necto for at least a few minutes so I can wish Doug happy birthday. But I need sort all this out later. I need to chill out.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:40 AM
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Still can't sleep. I just spent about $120.00 on books. Well...kind of. About half of what I ordered are actually pre-orders of books that will be released throughout 2007, and I'll only be charged for them as they are shipped. I basically caught up on most of the Star Trek books that I want to get. A lot of the new ones sound fantastic, but I have a lot of reading before I get there. I finally ordered the rest of the New Frontier series, as it doesn't sound like it's going away anytime soon, and I might as well get the whole story.

I'm going to update the Trek section of the site until I collapse; hopefully getting a bit of sleep before Mark sets me to work.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:24 AM
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   Thursday, March 15, 2007

I slept from around 9:30am - 2:30pm on Wednesday. Then it was training with Mark for the Bitserve job. We worked for 3 hours or so, then went to pick up some mail from Mark's other job, and Hollywood to check on my schedule and rent a movie for Mark. When we got home we watched Shortbus, which arrived in the mail today, and then we worked some more. I took another break later when Wendy called. We're so hanging out Friday night. She told me that she's moving back to Ohio at the end of April, which totally sucks! I was just gettin to know her. Hopefully we can finish Torchwood off by then. :-0( Erg. I worked with Mark some more, but I was dead tired at this point, and really only half there. I eventually fell asleep in Mark's room, which NEVER happens. I woke up around 15 minutes ago, got up for something to drink, came to my own room an wrote this.

I've been extra horny all day. Part of that is probably it being Spring. Part of that is probably the freedom I'm starting to feel with the new job, even if learning the job is akin to learning a whole new language. Some of it might have something to do with the amazing orgasm I gave myself last night, and now I'm just hungry for more. But most of it has to do with a boy named Corey.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:19 AM
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Oh, I found my lost bottle of Midrin yesterday, in Mark's laundry basket! lol

Alright, so I'm watching the extras from Shortbus, and I'm downloading the soundtrack, as I'm remember that I love it. I wrote some poetry tonight, for the first time in months, one of which I wrote about Wendy leaving, and posted to her facebook page. I hope she likes it.

I'll probably go back to sleep soon.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:09 AM
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   Friday, March 16, 2007

I slept from around 10am-5pm on Thursday. My stomach wasn't happy, and remained angry for hours to come. After Mark got home from work, we both ate, and watched some tv before more hours of training. I billed some customers, and suspended some accounts, and helped some other people. If not for the stomach troubles, it would have mostly been fun. Mark later thanked me for all that I've done lately for helping to get rid of some of his stress.

I don't think Wendy saw her poem, as I never got a response; maybe she was extra busy, and couldn't get back to me. I'll see her tonight for sure though, so that's cool. I'd like to watch 4 or 5 Torchwood episodes tonight. I'm hanging out with Corey on Saturday, though we haven't hammered out any details. I'm just hoping for a good time there.

I chatted on gay.com again tonight. I've really been enjoying all the great conversations I've been having there lately.

Some of the Trek books I ordered will be here tomorrow. I don't have room for them on my shelf anymore; I'll have to find some way to fit them in my room, or store them or something.

I just got a voicemail from Mollie; I'll call her back later, as I'm so going to bed now. Hopefully work and stuff will go well today. I still need to figure out what I can give to Doug for his birthday at Necto. I don't really want to go to the bar tonight; especially now that Wendy will be over. It sucks to have obligations.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:19 AM
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I slept for a couple of hours after the last entry. I woke up with my left eye watering like mad; still don't know why. I tried to get back to sleep, but couldn't. Before I slept I read a chapter of Harry Potter 3, and then I dreamed that Mark & I were at Hogwarts, trying to explain the Columbine Massacre. It was all very dark, but silly.

When I woke up I had something to drink, then couldn't get back to sleep, so I read 3 or 4 more chapters. Then I hopped online, where I started this, before getting distracted by e-mail, wikipedia, and a Sook-Yin Lee interview that I happened across. I've been thinking about Shortbus since seeing it, and I really want to watch it again, with the cast commentary on. I really want Mollie to see the movie too, because I think the sex stuff won't distract her from the story. I'm not sure she'd even realize that people in the movie were naked. ;-0) I miss her.

Anyways...yeah. Been thinking about the movie. I didn't think it was that profound the when I saw it. There were amazing moments, but I didn't expect them to haunt me this way, because a lot of the film, or all of the film seems to be obviously fictional, but at the same time there are these moments that keep popping up in my mind from the film. I really need to watch it again.

While sitting at my computer, I listened to Mark's alarm go off a few times, and now he's in the shower. I'm going to try to get some more sleep before work. We're going to trade off the car on Mark's lunch.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:49 AM
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   Saturday, March 17, 2007

After the last entry, I couldn't sleep for anything. It sucked because I knew I had to work, and that I wasn't going to be able to sleep after work as I had plans with Wend and had to go with Doug a happy birthday. I ended up calling in, but I got Meg to cover my shift. This turned out to be a very wise decision on my part. Because when I did finally sleep (exhausted, and hungry) it seemed to break me out of whatever shit hole I was falling into. I think if I'd gone things would have been horrible.

Also after the last entry, but before sleep took me, I ordered some Billie Piper cds; some more Trek books, but only because I learned all of these items were out of print, and I didn't want to miss a chance at having them. There are tons of other things that I want, which I'm not buying right and left, because they'll be there a month from now, you know?

I also watched the latest Smallville episode, which was called "Promise". It wasn't a perfect episode, but it was one of those episodes that changes the whole show, and really pays off on things that have been building for years, without the kind of reset button that really annoys me. I don't love this show; I really don't, but I like it a lot. lol

Sleep was filled with odd images. Most of them stemming from that episode of Smallville, mixed in with stuff about my sister Janice, and our childhood, which oddly enough, popped up in conversation with Wendy later.

When Mark got home, he cleaned up a bit, while I shaved and showered. I had helped him check for Bitserve related business earlier, and there didn't seem to be anything dire. Wendy came over around 9pm, and we watched two episodes of Torchwood ("Small Worlds" & "Countrycide"). Wendy continues to amuse me, and we could be really good friends. Too bad she's leaving for Ohio when she graduates in April. She seems interested in staying in touch, and hanging out though, which is cool.

We went to Necto after that and I listened to her stories about her mom, their cat, drugs, sex, birth control - it was all fun. I paid for her to get in, as I felt bad that we'd only be there as short time; the girl that works the door that lets me in for free wasn't there; it was $10.00; blah. We found Doug & I wished him happy birthday. He invited me to another party for him at Backstreet tonight, where I could get in for free, but I don't know that I'd enjoy going to Backstreet; especially since I have no clue how to get there.

We left in a hurry, after maybe 10 minutes, as I was starving and wanted pizza from Little Caesars. Wendy started asking questions about my eating, and I gave her the whole sordid story, which seemed to shock her, and I got a sense that she really cared about me, and wanted to help me. It was unexpected, and personal and intimate. The kind of thing that can make or break a friendship, and it made ours stronger. We continued to talk until we got back to the condo where we watched two more episodes of Torchwood ("Greeks Bearing Gifts" & "They Keep Killing Suzie"). Though Wendy was falling asleep at that point. We chatted some more, and agreed we'd take some pictures of us on her next visit, where we plan on finishing off Torchwood; there are only 5 episodes she hasn't seen now. We hugged goodnight, and then she was gone.

After she left I jumped online, and chatted at gay.com yet again. I met some new people. I talked to others I'd met recently. Eventually Travis Kelley tracked me down, and chatted me up, while I also chatted with Corey on yahoo.messenger. It was a good time. Corey & I might hang out today, but it's just as likely that we won't hang out until next week, when his car is fixed. He owns a cat, and it's a shedder, and I'm allergic. And it would suck to drive out to Troy, drive back to Ann Arbor to hang out (that's 2 hours right there), then drive him back to Troy, and then back home again. It would be a lot simpler for him to drive out here. So, yeah, probably not hanging out today, but we talked about it, and everything is good, which is...well...good. ;-0)

Oh, and I told Corey about my blog, so he's probably going to read this. He seemed to enjoy it.

After all that I was exhausted, but really horny. I jacked off, and showered. And wrote this.

Now that I think about it more...I think I have a bit of a crush on Wendy. Not a crush exactly. But you know how straight guys sometimes have a crush on another guy, and it's not really sexual - it's just...a crush. It's like that. I just want to spend more time with her is all. And she's fun. We argue and laugh, and it's nice to hear someone else talk about missing Mollie. I feel like I whine about missing Mollie to everyone, and it's nice to hear it coming from someone else. I'm really not happy about her moving away so soon after me "losing" Mollie.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:19 AM
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