Sunday, September 20, 2009

Michael is sleeping soundly behind me while I type this. I have to wake Michael up in about 8 minutes to get him ready for work.

Michael and I went and got my HIV test results yesterday morning: Negative; Non-Reactive. This is a good first step. This doesn't mean I'm HIV Negative though. I won't know for sure until early December.

On the ride out to HARC, where I get tested, Michael confessed that he was scared too. He was afraid that his hurtful behavior could possibly damage me and destroy us. It was a confession that he might not have shared previously, and brought home how much this experience has changed us both.

After the negative result we returned to the condo, taking a different route. Michael worrying that we were doomed regardless of the results and I confessed something to him as well. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. If we come through all this in December and we're clean, and Michael has really changed, I don't ever want to lose him. This is statement that I may not have been able to express before, thinking it silly or weak, but having come so close to losing him, I know that I simply don't want to ever have that happen. But I don't want any more lies. And he has sworn that this will never happen. We'll see how it all works out.

We later went to Little Caesars and Taco Bell; the food was good. I gave my leftovers to Mark, who said that he enjoyed them. We watched another episode of Battletar Galactica ("Deadlock"), then got ready and went to his cousin Billy's BBQ.

The family get together, which was in South Lyon, was fun, though I didn't get to talk with as many people this time. There were still some connections made and I felt honored to be by Michael's side. I played with his niece Katie, and got some sympathy from his cousin Lauren. It was nice to see his aunts and sisters again (and his mother). It was what it was. And afterwards we headed back to the condo.

On the way back there was more conversation about us as a couple, and how very different we are. We didn't end up going to the condo, but instead went to the bank & RiteAid to get my Eppy Pen, only the pharmacy was closed. I got some M&Ms. We went to Whole Foods and I got more Tofu (the plain variety for smoothies and things), some Vegan Mayo (which seems to taste like the real deal), some Colby Cheese (so I could compare the real thing with something else I bought) and some more Green Goodness. I'd like to try some fake eggs if I could, with my vegan cheese and maybe some vegan bacon. It's something I'm thinking about.

Once home we chilled in my room. Michael had some more of the pudding he'd made the night before, and I had a vegan shake (using the chocolate tofu that I'd bought previously), which was yummy. . Michael had bought a vegan cook book so I could find recipies I might want to try and that he could cook for me - and he was thumbing through that and checking things out. He suggested that he might start eating better if he was helping me with foods, which I thought sounded cool. I thought that Mark was home in bed, but he called to see if we wanted anything to eat, but we were set, so that was that.

We watched another episode of BSG ("Someone to Watch Over Me") and then had more conversations about us and everything relating to us. Michael said he had questions for me. He asked me if I loved him and I told him I do. He asked if I meant what I said earlier about wanting to spend the rest of my life with him, and I affirmed that I did mean every word of it. And then he warned me that I wouldn't like the final question, but asked if in December we're good on all fronts would I consider being his husband, and I said I would. That must sound so crazy after what we've just been through, but if we can make it through that and get to December, then I will certainly consider being his husband, because honestly, that's what I want to be. I did however stipulate that I want a prenup that says that if he cheats I get all his stuff. lol. And it should be noted that while I want this, and I hope we make it to December without any troubles, I'm well aware that this is not a sure thing and I'm trying not to get excited about it. We'll just take it one day at a time and see where life takes us.

There has also been much talk of Michael getting rid of his cats and dogs, selling his house, and possibly finding a job and apartment in Ann Arbor - which would be really great. ;-0)

After that we watched the penultimate episode of BSG (the extended cut of "Islanded in a Stream of Stars") before we went to sleep. My stomach was upset much of the night, and I have some other troubles I don't feel like discussing here, but I slept enough, and thought enough, and cuddled enough to feel like the the night was a complete success. I also updated some bits on my website; mostly Doctor Who related.

Michael woke up while I was writing that last part and I tackled him, giving him a friendly morning wank; a safe activity, which he enjoyed quite a lot. He cleaned up and got ready, and I walked him out, with a big hug goodbye.

Mark asked me if Michael just left and I said he did and I told him about the pre-engagement-engagement thing. We talked about what Mark got up to last night... and my stomach was still upset. Erg. Not feeling well today at all. And I think I'll actually need a few days to recuperate.

Got a sweet text from Michael at 12:26 PM:

"I love you and miss you already. But my heart is filled with happies cause of you. It's all your fault"

;-0)

If I wasn't so sore and blechy I'd visit Michael at work today. I'd like to visit him this week sometime at his house, but I don't know his schedule yet. We'll see.

Here begins the ravings of a BSG fan, which can be skipped by anyone who doesn't care about such things:

I was thinking about Battletstar Galactica earlier. I was thinking about the upcoming BSG movie "The Plan", and how I think it will probably play better between "No Exit" & "Deadlock" rather than after people finish the series. I understand the allure from a marketing standpoint, to encourage people to watch 'The Plan' after the run of the series to entice them into rewatching the seres from the beginning, but I just don't think that serves the story of the series.

Here's how I see the series playing out:

001 Caprica: The Movie [Extended Cut]
002 1x01
003 1x02
004 1x03
005 1x04
006 1x05
007 1x06
008 1x07
009 1x08
010 1x09
011 1x10
012 1x11
013 1x12
014 1x13
015 1x14
016 1x15
017 1x16
018 1x17
019 1x18
020 Razor Minisodes [19 Minutes]
021 Battlestar Galactica: The Miniseries
022 1x01 33
023 1x02 Water
024 1x03 Bastille Day
025 1x04 Act of Contrition
026 1x05 You Can't Go Home Again
027 1x06 Litmus
028 1x07 Six Degrees of Separation
029 1x08 Flesh and Bone
030 1x09 Tigh Me Up, Tigh Me Down
031 1x10 The Hand of God
032 1x11 Colonial Day
033 1x12 Kobol's Last Gleaming, Part 1
034 1x13 Kobol's Last Gleaming, Part 2
035 2x01 Scattered
036 2x02 Valley of Darkness
037 2x03 Fragged
038 2x04 Resistance
039 2x05 The Farm
040 2x06 Home, Part 1
041 2x07 Home, Part 2
042 2x08 Final Cut
043 2x09 Flight of the Phoenix
044 2x10 Pegasus [Extended Cut - 59 Minutes]
045 2x11 Resurrection Ship, Part 1
046 2x12 Resurrection Ship, Part 2
047 2x13 Epiphanies
048 2x14 Black Market
049 2x15 Scar
050 2x16 Sacrifice
051 2x17 The Captain's Hand
052 2x18 Dowloaded
053 Battlestar Galactica: Razor [Extended]
054 2x19 Lay Down Your Burdens, Part 1
055 2x20 Lay Down Your Burdens, Part 2
056 BSG: The Resistance [Webisodes]
057 3x01 Occupation
058 3x02 Precipice
059 3x03 Exodus, Part 1
060 3x04 Exodus, Part 2
061 3x05 Collaborators
062 3x06 Torn
063 3x07 A Measure of Salvation
064 3x08 Hero
065 3x09 Unfinished Business [Extended Cut]
066 3x10 The Passage
067 3x11 The Eye of Jupiter
068 3x12 Rapture
069 3x13 Taking a Break From All Your Worries
070 3x14 The Woman King
071 3x15 A Day in the Life
072 3x16 Dirty Hands
073 3x17 Maelstrom
074 3x18 The Son Also Rises
075 3x19 Crossroads, Part 1
076 3x20 Crossroads, Part 2
077 4x01 He That Believeth In Me
078 4x02 Six of One
079 4x03 The Ties That Bind
080 4x04 Escape Velocity
081 4x05 The Road Less Traveled
082 4x06 Faith
083 4x07 Guess What's Coming to Dinner
084 4x08 Sine Qua Non
085 4x09 The Hub
086 4x10 Revelations
087 4x11 Sometimes a Great Notion
088 4x12 A Disquiet Follows My Sou[Extended]
089 BSG: The Face of the Enemy [Webisodes]
090 4x13 The Oath
091 4x14 Blood on the Scales
092 4x15 No Exit
093 BSG: The Plan [Extended]
094 4x16 Deadlock
095 4x17 Someone To Watch Over Me
096 4x18 Islanded in a Stream of Stars*
097 4x19 Daybreak [152 Minutes]

SPOILERS FOR THE FINAL 11 EPISODES OF BSG FOLLOW:

During the closing episodes of Battlestar Galactica (installments 87-97) we get a series of flashbacks & revelations; newly revealed truths about events we thought we understood but did not.

The first of these episodes is "Sometimes a Great Notion", which reveals that Earth was the home to the 13th Tribe and that they were all Cylons. The episode also features flashbacks of Galen, Saul & Ellen thousands of years ago, revealing Ellen Tigh as the final member of the Final Five.

2 installments later, in "The Face of Enemy" webisodes we learn that Gaeta & Hoshi are bi / gay; while flashbacks lay the ground work for Gaeta's upcoming swan song, including new information on the New Caprica Arc along with the answer of what Baltar whispered to Gaeta in 3x13 "Taking a Break From All Your Worries".

3 installments later we have "No Exit" which all but spells out the entire history of the Cylon race, revealing that Cavil is the villain and that the Final Five are merely victims of a larger scheme. The installment also features flashbacks revealing new information to several key Season 3 & 4 episodes including 3x04 "Exodus, Part 2", 3x12 "Rapture" & 4x09 "The Hub".

This is followed up by "The Plan" which goes back to before the BSG Miniseries and tells the first 2 seasons of the series from the Cylon perspective, revealing startling truths of scenes we only thought we understood the first time around, and shedding light on dark corners we never suspected existed.

2 episodes later in "Someone To Watch Over Me" we have flashbacks to Seasons 1 & 2 concerning Tyrol and Boomer (without new information), which is commented on during the final episodes of the series. The episode also gives us more glimpses of Kara as a child.

2 episodes later we have the grand 152 minute extended cut finale which has flashbacks to before the start of the series for characters including Lee Adama, William Adama, Zack Adama, Karl "Helo" Agathon, Samuel Anders, Gaius Baltar, Caprica Six, Laura Roslyn, Kara "Starbuck" Thrace, Ellen Tigh, Saul Tigh, Callandra "Cally" Henderson Tyrol, Galen Tyrol, and Sharon "Boomer" Valeri. The coda of the series also references 'Caprica Before The Fall" - a nod to the prequel series, and acknowledging that this is the true ending to the entire saga.

Viewed my way, 6 of the final 11 episodes feature flashbacks and revelations that change what we thought we knew about the characters and the storyline as a whole, while also allowing for the final image from 'Daybreak' to BE THE FINAL IMAGE. I could go on, but I've probaby scared everyone away already.

I just think it's cool that viewed in this way, the series comes full circle and ends it's run by looking back at what came before, while looking forward to what is to come. It feels very much like what I'm going through right now in my life, where looking back on the past is a necessary step to embracing the present and approaching the future. It resonates for me. Bring on "The Plan". ;-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:38 PM
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I read e-mail; worked on Michael's farm; ate; chilled; tried to not be annoyed with my condition. I'm doing ok. I just need to chill today.

Michael just called me; he just got to work. He went home from here, showered, watched 2 episodes of Heroes and then went to work. He let me know his schedule this week and what he's planning on doing, and what he'd like to do together. We'll probably hang out Thursday night and finish off BSG, save "The Plan" & "Caprica" which we'll most likely experience together as they're released, if all goes well.

I think my stomach is starting to feel a little better. It's possible I might get that flu shot today, but I also want to make sure I have time to work on my website today and relax - just to make sure I eat right and get over whatever is going on with me.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:51 PM
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   Monday, September 21, 2009

My stomach feels a lot better, but not sure if it will last. I got some work done on random sections of my website. I have a bad headache and took some midrin, but it's not kicked in yet. I'm tired. And I miss Michael.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:38 AM
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I went to bed about a quarter after 1am. I slept for about 5.5 hours; woke up with headache still alive and kicking. Took another midrin and checked my facebook. Michael wanted me to call him when I was awake, but I'm going right back to bed. I'll call him in the morning. I'll text him now to let him know what's what.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:00 AM
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Woke up around 10:30am. Headache still with me. I called Michael but there was no answer; left him a voicemail; he's probably sleeping. I keep forgetting to ask if I can borrow his laptop again. The thing we borrowed it for before kind of fizzled, but then Michael and I had all that drama so I couldn't ask then, and now I don't know if he needs it for his manager's meeting on Wednesday. I'll ask him later (if I remember).

I took some more pain killer. I hope I'm not completely obliterating my liver.

I'm driving Mark to work so I can get my flu shot and pick up some meds at the pharmacy.

Looks like I missed a call from Micahel at 12:03pm. Says he watched Heroes until around 4am then fell asleep; that sleeping in his bed was no fun without me. Perhaps I'll sleep in his bed sometime soon. I can maybe take some claritin(?) or something so the cats don't kill me. It's a thought.

I need to get my ass in gear.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:47 PM
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Mark & I went to the pharmacy to get my perscriptions started, then went to Kroger for my flu shot, then back to the pharmacy for my drugs (Midrin and my first Eppi Pen), then to Mark's work to drop him off (though he helped me with some stuff there), to the bank to deposit money, and then home. I still have a headache. I blame the weather and my jaw. All through that I exchanged texts with Michael. I remembered to ask him about his computer this time. I need to call or text him to let him know if I'll be stopping by his place for it, or having him over the night. I definitely want to see him, but I'm worried my headache might make cuddling unfun. I'll wait awhile and see if I can't lose it.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:21 PM
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   Tuesday, September 22, 2009

I relaxed after the last entry and just chilled for a bit. Later I stroked off, shaved and showered and was able to get rid of my headache. I worked on my website. I picked up Mark from work ontime and chilled some more. I'm heading over to Michael's in a few minutes (and I've been in contact with him off and on all day).

I'm tired.

   posted by Bald Jason at 01:26 AM
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I got to Michael's a little after 2am. It was good to see him, though I was extremely tired, and I didn't feel like myself at all. I stuck around until around 3:22am. I got home around 4am I think, with my headache returning with a vengence. I didn't take any pain killer for it because I'd had so much yesterday (though still under the max suggested dose) that I didn't want to fuck up my system anymore. I passed out around 6am I think, though I'm not certain. I slept about 4 hours. My stomach is still bothering me. :-0( Oh well.

This week mostly sucks so far.

I'm gonna have something to eat.

I so need to clean my room.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:17 PM
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I had a nice snack. I rib rolled Mark; that's this exercise that he needs my help with, that helps keep his pain levels down. It's simple to do and helps him a lot, so I enjoy doing it. Mark left for work and will be helping me with some stuff later I think. I should have driven Mark and gone to get some groceries but I just dont' feel up to it. I'd like to get some cleaning done, and work on my website.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:59 PM
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I worked on Michael's farm. I did some chatting online with my ex-bf Corey. We exchanged drama stories. lol It was relaxing and fun. He's one of the few guys that I dated who had a good beginning, middle and end. It would be nice if he could visit us sometime soon; Mark likes to see him. And Mollie loved him too; though maybe because I think she kicked his ass at poker? I don't know. But it was nice. And if Michael is reading this I want you to know that I wasn't thinking about jumping his bones at all; I'm pretty sure the days of me and Corey in that way are completely over. He's just a friend. And hopefully someday you'll get to meet him! ;-0)

I also chatted with old time gay.com chap aarider. Interesting. Nice. He's very friendly, and apparetnly super hot to trot with my guy. Cute.

All that chatting got me to thinking that while Michael's gesture of deleting his online profiles is sweet, I'mn ot sure I want to be the guy that needs his boyfriend to not chat online to feel secure. Basically if Michael wants to hook up I'm sure he can find a way, so why get rid of that stuff? Or maybe it's a good thing. I don't know. I have mixed emotions about it.

Michael called me while I was typing this. He's having OUTRAGIOUS money troubles, so is super stressed out (and understandably so). He had to let me go for another call that might be helping him out (not sure though); I'll talk to him when he's done. I'm so worried about him now. :-0(

   posted by Bald Jason at 02:23 PM
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Spoke to Michael. Sounds like his money problems (annoying as they are) are probably under control. I'm working on his farm some more. Then taking a break.

Michael let me borrow his old phone so I could transcribe the texts that are on there (from me / to me); I'll try to get to that after I sleep; probably tonight. I so need a shower.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:46 PM
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I took a shower. I started cleaning my room; putting away clothes, making my bed, washing my new comforter. Did more work on Michael's farm (got some grapes to harvest soon), and worked on my webpage (though I didn't accomplish much). My headache, which keeps weaving and dodging, is currently with me, but muted, and for that at least I am grateful. Today is turning out better than I expected it to. Getting stuff done helps.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:59 PM
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Having trouble sleeping. Very tired. Wish Michael was here to hold me.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:41 PM
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I'm feeling depressed. It came on kind of suddenly. I'm not certain where the feeling is coming from; what the root of this sensation is, which is annoying. I'm annoyed and depressed...and I'm finding it impossible to sleep.

Oh. And the internet is moving extremely slowly.

   posted by Bald Jason at 10:33 PM
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   Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I couldn't get to sleep last night. Well actually I fell asleep around 10:50pm and was woken a few minutes later by my phone vibrating; Michael wanted to know why I couldn't sleep. lol I think I finally drifted off again around 2am. I woke up around 8:30, though it took me awhile to accomplish anything (like moving or getting out of bed). I should probably try going back to bed actually. Get more sleep. We'll see.

22 days until Sarah Jane brings us back into the Whoniverse. 34 days until 'The Plan' gives us our last 2009 glimps of BSG.

   posted by Bald Jason at 09:00 AM
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I didn't go back to sleep after the last entry. I worked on Michael's farm and read the news. I woke Mark up for work; I guess he slept a lot, which is good. The thing I borrowed Michael's computer for is working, I think, but I won't know for sure for several days; THANKS MICHAEL! ;-0) If it doesn't yield results this time I might give up on this option. Oh well.

I drove Mark to work and went to Whole Foods. I got cabbage, an apple, some romain leaves, more chocolate tofu, more vegan cheese, a bottle of water and more bread. I nearly bought a chocolate bar but decided I didn't need it, though I'd like to have my mom try this non-dairy sweet chocolate sometime and see what she thinks.

The kitchen looks kind of wrecked. Perhaps I'll do the dishes?

   posted by Bald Jason at 02:43 PM
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Talked to Michael earlier. Might be going to see him in a bit, to visit him and return his computer and phone. He doesn't use his computer as much as me; I'd be going crazy without mine.

Dishes are washing.

I think I'm going to get something to eat. Not eaten in at least 7 hours.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:08 PM
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Ate. Cleaned up kitchen a bit. Danced in my room to old industrial songs. Waiting for Michael to give me the word that it's ok to come see him. He said he might be home by 7, but another message said 8. I have to pick Mark up from work at 11; we're going to Meijer for Boost; also need toothpaste and toilet paper. Hope I don't forget.

I'm sleepy from my pill, but feeling ok.

And Peter Murphy singing "Cuts You Up" is making me all nostalgic. 1992-1994. :-0)

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:11 PM
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   Thursday, September 24, 2009

Left for Michael's around 7:30pm I think. Made it there in one piece. Michael had gotten a hair cut; he looked really good. He and David were playing Bash Blocks on Wii; I watched for a long time before Michael took a call and then I played for him before a neighbor girl brought us another controller so Michael, David & I could all play. It was fun.

Before I left we talked about the past some more, and I was fine. Except one thing he said tied into another thing in my brain and then suddenly I was grieving for the old Michael again. I have moments like that which are terrible. But my happiest moments come around Michael too. The sad moments are when I've forgotten what he did to me and then I'm reminded and it all comes flooding back. The happy moments are when I see him with none of that attachment and delusion. Another sign that it's important to grieve for what's been lost and to embrace what's been found.

On the drive to Mark's work I got yet another headache. I didn't want to take my Midrin though because I was driving so I toughed it out until I got there and then took them right away. Everything for next hour or so was annoying and painful.

Michael texted me while I was driving. Sweet sorrowful words. We're in pain, he and I, wanting to make it work, wanting to see the happy ending...but it will take time. Which sucks beyond the telling of it.

Mark & I went to Meijer. Got stuff. Ran into Aimee, a former Hollywood customer which was nice, except the pain in my head was really getting to me. About half way home Michael called me, but thankfully by that time my meds had dulled the pain. We spoke and then texted and then spoke again. Michael doesn't like seeing me in pain and wants to stop the hurting by leaving, but the thing I try to get across to him is that I'll hurt just as much (if not worse) without him...he just won't be around to see it.

I passed out after the last call, around 1am. I woke up around 7:30am. Read the news. Wrote this. Will try to sleep some more.

Michael should be coming over tonight after he gets out of work at 6pm.

   posted by Bald Jason at 09:08 AM
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The new Voyager book ("Unworthy") has shipped, though I've not read the last one yet. I'm getting behind on my Star Trek reading. Of course that means I've have more to read later.

It looks nice outside; I wonder if it is?

I kind of want to drive Mark to work so I can go get more bottled water, but that would mean I'd have to pick him up at 11pm, when otherwise I could just be cuddled up with Michael. But we really need water, and going would get me out of the house. We'll see what I decide.

I just got done working on Michael's farm; just planted Pumpkins and Cotton, which should be done on Monday or late Sunday.

I'm chilling with Michael tonight and much of tomorrow. Amber wants to see me sometime this weekend but I don't know when. Michael has Sunday off, but not sure if we're seeing each other or not.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:17 PM
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I drove Mark to work, despite my stomach being upset. I then went to get more water at Hiller's, though I took a round-about way getting there to take in the view that I'd been craving. Came home. Read more news. Cleaned up the fridge a bit. Gonna shave and trim shower. I should clean up my room a bit too, and maybe do some laundry.

I decided I'm eating too much junk food again; too much candy. I'll try to cut the chocolate candy crap from my diet. I don't know how long that will last, but I don't want to fall into old habbits.

I'm drinking cranberry juice.

I feel slightly depressed again. Kind of...zombie like, even though I'm doing stuff. Feel oversensitive and numb all at once. Like there's no fun left out in the world for me. There have been times when I've felt this way in the past and I've used sex to pull myself out of it, with varrying results...but I can't do that this time, and it's annoying the fuck out of me!!! lol

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:55 PM
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   posted by Bald Jason at 04:39 PM
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   Friday, September 25, 2009

Michael arrived around 7pm and we went to get food (LC & BK). We headed home and watched the first part of the new Glee before Michael started watching 'Cheetah Girls' and I got a phone call from a friend out in one of the Carolinas. It was odd hearing Andy / Benjiman (the friend) talk about his hopes and fears and crazy fun romantic entanglement, when mine was in the other room, watching a movie, with me, but separate. After the call I went back in my room to join him for the movie (that was my plan anyways).

When I got back in the room, Michael was asleep, with his movie blaring. I woke him up and there were cuddles and tickles. Everything was going well, until I told him something I had done. I didn't think this thing was so terrible, but it really upset Michael. He's upset that we have to talk about 'the past' every time we see each other. This upset me and I got very angry; this 'Past' is something that I've only had 2 weeks to deal with (part of which I denied that anything happened at all - as did he) - and I'm stuck in this pit of depression and insanity, and he makes it sound like he just wants me to get over it really fast, and if I knew how I would, but emotions don't work that way; time is needed. I think I'm doing extremely well under the circumstances, and if my way of dealing isn't his way of dealing...that's really not a terrible thing - as long as I do deal with it. I didn't ask for this to happen, and I didn't make this happen, but now that I know that it did, it changes EVERYTHING, and that's a lot to deal with. Some days it's so horrible I don't want to think or talk or anything, and others I'm ok. I just...it's hard and I need time, but everytime the subject comes up he says "We're not going to get through this, are we?" - and I think that's really premature. It does feel like we've been going over this problem for a long time, but just over 2 weeks ago I thought my relationship was stable, and then found out that it never really was...and now I'm dealing with finding out the truth of the past 5 months, and reconciling all that with what I thought I knew, and it's NOT EASY. It's damned hard. I still sometimes wonder if I'll survive it. Seriously. And it's only been 18 days. To expect me to have dealt with that in such a short time, when I can only talk to him about it in short bursts, seems unfair.

Anyways...things got very ugly. And then things got very hot. I don't know how it happened, but his getting upset and me getting upset kind of turned me on. I went at him full force. I was only gonna do safe stuff...or safer stuff, but his cooler mind prevailed and we didn't really do anything but makeout. Score 1 for Michael.

Soon it was time to pick up Mark. I talked Michael into going, but after we were on our way it turned out he wasn't feeling well. He stayed in the car to smoke, and I went inside, expecting we'd be out in a few minutes, which stretched out when Mark & I were discussing random topics with his coworkers. When we got out to the car Michael was thinking about his grandmother and the funeral and not feeling well. The ride home was tense, but I didn't have to talk as Michael & Mark were discussing insurance.

At home, Michael and I were getting comfy, but he smelled like smoke so we took a shower. Went back to bed, but Michael wanted to finish his movie; even with headphones on I could hear it, so I couldn't watch Glee. And I couldn't cuddle with Michael. And I couldn't feel like he was even with me. It was annoying. I put earplugs in and went to bed.

I woke up around 5am. My throat was dry and I needed to take some prilosec. I read some cool Predators news and just chilled. I'm gonna have another sip of water, turn down the air and try to get back to sleep.

Smallville Season 9 & Dollhouse Season 2 begin tonight, which means I'll probably be watching them Saturday night?

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:01 AM
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   Saturday, September 26, 2009

So after the last entry, I rejoined Michael in bed. We had fun cuddle time and play and sleep and all that. We left around 1:30pm to get his oil changed, then stopped at McDonalds to eat, Arby's to see his friend Kimmy, picked up the car and went to his mom Vickie's work. Later we went back to the condo and I gave Michael a full massage. We showered then watched the finale of BSG. Michael left and I chilled; talked on the phone (Mollie, Carrie, Mark) and online (Danny) until I was tired then started a Trek book until I slept around 2am I think.

Oh. During Michael's visit, Benjamin, one of the boys that Michael had cheated on me with, texted him. Michael texted him back that it was inappropriate and that he was trying to work things out with me and that he loves me. The guy was gracious and I feel I have closure with that guy. ;-0)

I woke up around 5am with my stomach not doing well and went back to bed exhausted and sore about an hour later. I woke up around noon I think to find I'd missed a message from Amber who was heading to Ann Arbor with her boyfriend Russel and Laurie. I called her back and then had a half hour to get ready which wasn't much. I was feeling better than in the morning, but was thinking we'd just stay in.

When they arrived it was so good to see Amber & Laurie again - so much joy! Russ, who I'd never met before was awesome, and fun was had. Eventually they (including Mark) all wanted food and they wanted Pizza House. There was a football game today at UofM and the game had gotten out so downtown was CRAZY and there was obviously a wait at Pizza House so we headed to Red Robin, which took a long time with traffic and once we got there we somehow just missed the rush. I ate though I didn't think I should trust that food in my stomach; I was just too hungry; I didn't take 2nds though.

We left when Michael was about 5 minutes from the condo, meeting him there. We chilled for a bit; took some pictures, but the visiting team had to leave for a haunted house in Homer. Michael took a shower in that time. He's having a bad day; work was frustrating; his fridge at home died, and now he's paying his bills. We're trying to think of what to do. I'm sleepy.

   posted by Bald Jason at 06:54 PM
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