Bald Jason's Musings
Monday, March 2, 2009
Easynews seems to be getting slightly better; something is happening there. But not enough. I still don't have Friday's BSG and it's pissing me off. I really want to rewatch the ending.
I had a really great conversation with Mollie yesterday.
So...last night, just like the previous Sunday, I sat myself down and started to watch Lost. I'd seen the first 3.5 episodes of Season 2. I finished the 4th episode, then watched 8 more, which I enjoyed more than I expected too. I'm enjoying this method of watching Lost in long sittings. I'm thinking it must be hell to wait from week to week, but I guess I'll soon know that for sure, as even if I don't catch up by the end of the season - there will still be one more season to go before the series ends.
I have a headache. I only had 1 midrin left, which I took, but it obviously wasn't enough. I was going to have my perscription filled on Saturday but that didn't work out. Damn.
I'm about to eat.
posted by Bald Jason at 08:15 PM
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Tuesday, March 3, 2009
I took more pictures last night, then I shaved and showered. I got ready for Necto. I took more pictures while I waited for Mark to get home, and then took 3 more with him when he got home. I left shortly after that.
The car was still warm so that was nice, on a very cold night. I had rock star parking, about 8 feet from the door. I tipped the coat check girl, and Becky when she gave me 2 free drinks. I danced quite a bit. Flirted with some cute boys. And chatted up some friends. Aaron (I usually forget his name) & I bonded with Henry & Sam (an 18yo girl). It was fun.
After the bar I went to Kroger for some groceries. I still need to go to the bank at some point, and to Meijer to get my Midren perscription filled. Part of me wants to go now...and the other half just wants to go to bed. It could go either way at this point.
After getting home I snacked while I chatted on line. Then when that wasn't going so well I sorted e-mail. I tend to hang on to every little e-mail, even when I clearly don't need them. So I got rid of TONS of stuff I don't need. Later, I uploaded the new pix, including pix taken in January & February and sorted all of them. I uploaded some to gay.com, Facebook and Myspace, which actually took a long time. While I was uploading pix to Facebook, my ex-bf Paul chatted me up. It was fun.
I've had a fun morning.
Easynews is still fucked up. Damn it.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:09 AM
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I took the shower. Not going to Meijer though. Mark is going to drop off my perscription today...and I assume he'll pick it up tomorrow.
I forgot to mention that I saw the new trailer for T4 yesterday and it looks awesome. I loved the first movie. I saw the 2nd one 8 times in theaters, and while I enjoyed it a great deal, I still loved #1 more. The Special Edition of 2 helped a bit. I saw T3 in theaters and bought it on dvd. It's not as good as the first 2, but it's not horrible either - and I really respected the ending of the film. T4 looks better than 3, and has the potential to beat 2 (at least from my perspective) - it definitely looks better than The Sarah Connon Chronicles.
Oh. I also read that Dr. Manhattan will have several more fully frontal shots in the director's cut. I'm oddly impressed. And that's the version I'm waiting to see to. Actually, I'm waiting to see the extra-extra long version that comes out this fall, or that's the plan. I may see it in the theater...I'm not sure.
Movies I want to see enough to see them in the theater:
Terminator 4
Harry Potter 6
Wolverine (aka X-Men 0)I have a thing for prequels and sequels.
I may see Avatar in the theater though.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:53 PM
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Thursday, March 5, 2009
On Tuesday afternoon I rewatched Terminator 2: Judgment Day. I don't own the original (my favorite in the series) or I'd have watched that one first. It was odd rewatching T2. I saw it in theaters 8 times between July 4 & August 12, 2001. I owned the VHS of it the day it was released. I owneed the special VHS edition of it the day that was released. I had read the book of the film, and the screenplay. I knew this movie inside and out, but had never watched it on DVD, and hadn't really seen it in nearly a decade. I could quote most scenes, as I demonstrated to Mark - saying complicated lines of dialogue moments before the actors did. I thought maybe the movie was one I never needed to revisit, but it was interesting. For one thing, the humor annoyed me a lot more (as it also does in 3); one thing I love about the original is it's darkness - something 4 looks to have in spades. 2ndly, John Connor (Eddie Furlong) was about my age, or slightly younger when the movie was new - but going back he looks so fucking young - and his performance seemed more impressive as a result. I enjoyed rewatching it. I still don't like it as much as the first. But it was good. In retrospect it kind of lost some points for morphing the hard R of the original into what is basically a an R rated family film.
I also updated the pictures in my gay.com profile, and chatted on there a bit. I had a bit of trouble as an animated gif kept getting moved from the adult section to the non-adult section of my profile, all based on the first frame of the animation. I kept moving it back, but they cyber insisted. I had to call them and explain what they were doing - and after a really ANNOYING conversation they fixed it.
I slept at odd hours.
On Wednesday I was chatting in the Ann Arbor room on gay.com. Michael Eisinger was in there, and after an hour or so he sent me a private message to ask me about some other guy in the chat room. This lead to me asking him about the troubles we've had recently. He was upset about things I'd written in my personal blog about him. I told him how much he'd hurt me then and that my words weren't intended to hurt him, but were an expression of my own suffering, and asked him to forgive me. He did. We agreed that trust would take time, but we started talking again. He told me he and Chris are now in an open relationship, and Chris then chimed in too.
Chris apparently had a dream this week that we three participated in a threesome. They seem to want to make it a reality, and it's hot to think about but I have reservations. It's possible it could be amazing...or a disaster. And I don't want to hurt (or get hurt by) anyone. Plus I just reconnected with Jim (who I've not heard from since Tuesday morning). But perhaps Chris is prescient, as when he had the dream we 3 weren't even on speaking terms...and suddenly, now we are. lol. I'm not knocking it. Hopefully our friendships contine to grow and we have a long while to decide what will become of us.
Michael also suddenly realized he'd never seen me drunk, though why anyone would want to see me drunk I'm not certain. Perhaps I make an even bigger ass of myself while intoxicated; if so nobody has ever told me. lol I'm not opposed to the idea of drinking with Michael though. Sounds like fun.
Overall, I'm just happy to be friends with Michael again. I know enough time has passed now. I'm very happy for him and Chris. The idea of them doesn't upset me, or anything like that. I'm not in love with him. It's just a waste to not be friends with him after all the time we spent together, and I'm just relieved that this uncomfortable silence has been broken.
I later slept more. I dreamt that I was visiting Michael & Chris, but that they lived in this swanky black and white apartment complex in central Ann Arbor. It was awesome. I woke up feeling good about 4 hours later.
I chatted with Michael and Chris some more. Michael was arranging furnature and Chris was chilling. Mark got home and I told him all the news. He's pretty sure the 3some will happen. lol. We'll see. I still felt tired. I stayed online until about 3am.
I dreamt that I was back at the Michael/Chris apartment from my previous dream. This time they had roomies. The roomies were these hot religious boys that used to be our neighbors. They were wearing Sparkies uniforms (a baptist church youth groupe program that I was involved in). I mentioned I used to work in AWANA and they sort of warmed up to me, until I revealed that I was gay and didn't believe in god. Suddenly I was in a HUGE catholic school. It was actually more like a catholic college or city. One of the boys from the apartment went to the pulpet and ripped me a (sarcastic) new one and was applauded. I said I'd have to get my game on and assimilate so I could have my revenge. I infiltrated the different leveles of the church. I found hypocrosy. I found closeted biggot gays getting it on. I found murder. I found torture. Lies. Pain. I was moved. But I was found out. I was in hiding and trying to write down my thoughts but it came out as a jumbled mess. My nephew Justin tried to help me, which made me smile. I was on the run in the Catholic city. There were priest detectives after me, and others were looking for me from without the city - there was a sort of media blitz. I lost my way in the school, but Mollie (who had also infiltrated Priest City and was living quite happily) took the paper from me that I'd tried to order my thoughts on, and made sense of my manic ramblings before returning them to me; I thanked her. I was being deemed a menace, but I was struggling to find a priest. I was weeping. I'd had a moment of spiritual clairity. A list of songs was written in eyeliner on my palm symbolizing the truth that had come to me (only 2 of them stuck with me when I woke up, but I'm convinced there were 5). I screamed from the pulpet my confession to the church, to the priests. I said that we were all going to hell. That god was an ass. That he'd screw them all over eventually and I'd just rather go to hell when I die, rather than after being in heaven. That god was bound to betray us all. And all because he could. Because that's what he wanted to do. And it didn't matter how much we loved him or each other. A priest approached me and held me, telling me he knew what I said was the truth. The masses in the giant temple were shocked, horrified, angry and broken. I experienced stigmata. I woke up when Mark blew his nose. I had a mashup of songs stuck in my head. It was "Praying for Time" by George Michael & "The End is the Beginning is the End" by Smashing Pumpkins. I layed in bed trying to remember the details of the dream; telling Mark about it; then closing my eyes and remembering more. I listened to the Smashing Pumpkin's song (which was on the Batman & Robin soundtrack - was once going to be used on a CD for Shawn Foreman, and was recently used in a trailer for WATCHMEN) while I wrote this. I feel good that I got this all out.
posted by Bald Jason at 06:11 AM
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Full Trailer for Wolverine (be sure to full screen it)
Full Terminator Salvation Trailer
posted by Bald Jason at 06:42 AM
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"For a moment of night we have a glimpse of ourselves and of our world islanded in its stream of stars— pilgrims of mortality, voyaging between horizons across eternal seas of space and time."
Henry Beston
The next episode of BSG is titled "Islanded in a Stream of Stars". :-0)
posted by Bald Jason at 10:28 AM
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Mark left for work mostly on time; not as early as he has been, but he probably won't be late.
I played some Unholy War this morning. Had a bit a headache.
Speaking of my head, I've got quite a gash on it. Not sure when it happened. I'm so clumsy. I sliced my big toe open on my desk the other day. I'm gonna fall down the stairs and break my hip. You just wait. lol
I watched an episode of Nip/Tuck. I've been watching this season really slow. I'm 5 episodes behind. It was good though.
posted by Bald Jason at 02:40 PM
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Friday, March 6, 2009
The new Star Trek XI trailer looks frakking awesome!!!
The new Harry Potter 6 Trailer seems to confirm it's greatness... :-0)
Less than 10 hours until the penultimate BSG begins. Though there are 2 more installments after tonight they tell a combined story ("Daybreak") over 3 hours of television. This makes me wonder how tonight's episode will end? I'm hoping it leaves us breathless for the finale to this series which has come to mean a great deal to me.
In other such news, Knight Rider has thankfully been cancelled. I'd like to say that this is what you get when you take a bisexual character from the pilot, which sold the series in the first place, and then desexualize her, and then write her out of the series... but I'm not certain that had anything to do with it. I do know that it pissed of a lot of LGBT fans who were interested in the project. I had considered watching it when I heard about this character, and then decided not to bother when I heard what was done to her.
Heroes has sadly not been cancelled. It's actually been renewed for a 4th season of 18-20 episodes. I don't get that decision at all. Maybe they have some brilliant idea that will end the series in style? That would be too much to hope for at this point, though perhaps if they went this route I'd force myself to watch the rest of the series. Which would be a difficult as I can't even bring myself to watch it as it airs now, but acccording to Mark (who does continue to watch) it hasn't improved. The more I think on it, the more I feel it should have had a better ending in the first season, and just ended there. Why can't we have popular shows end when they're ahead like they do in the UK?
The band Daft Punk will be creating the music for Tron 2 (or is it Tr2n?). Hmmmm.
Roger Ebert gave (the decidedly mixed review movie) Watchmen a 4 star review. I want to see this movie. I do. But I want to see the extra extended cut that's planned for release on DVD this fall. I find it distracting to see multiple versions of a film, and would rather just have the full extended cut. My memory makes it harder to except extended cuts if I enjoy the shorter versions. For instance, I'm still haunted by the original music cues from the theatrical version of "The Fellowship of the Ring" when I watch the improved, extended cut of the film. Scenes that made me weep the first time around and ruined to an extent because my mind can't accept the new music for the same scenes. But I know this about myself, so I can preclude that from happening by waiting for the extended cuts when I know about them in advance.
I watched another episode of Nip/Tuck after the last entry. I still have 4 more episodes to catch up on, though someone ruined a bit of the finale for me already.
Going back to BSG for the rest of this post (feel free to skip it if this bores you). For most shows I enjoy, I can fairly easily give you a top 10 list of episodes that I love. I found out the other day that I find it nearly impossible to limit my choices to just 10 or even 15 episodes of BSG, which is saying something as BSG has fewer episodes than the other shows that I would compare it too. DS9 for instance has 176 episodes, but only 9 episodes stand out as truly exceptional in my mind, after which there are many others that I enjoy a great deal, but aren't quite in the same league. Where as BSG (to my way of thinking) has an episode count of 78 episodes total (including the upcoming movie "The Plan").
There are, however, 2 episodes that I loathe, and 3 others that I strongly dislike. There's one more that I would have added to this list, but some of what has been revealed in the final episodes has softened my view of that episode (even though one such episode is 1 of the 2 that I loathe). Ironicially, the final season has also improved my outlook on another of the episodes I dislike, though not by much. The five episodes in question are listed from 'best' to 'worst', and are each followed by the Season and episode #, again, to my way of thinking:
05 Exodus, Part 1 (3x04)
04 The Woman King (3x15)
03 A Day in the Life (3x16)
02 Hero (3x09)
01 Deadlock (4x17)Many people dislike Season Two's "Black Market" episode, but it has never botherered me. "Exodus, Part 1" isn't a terrible episode, but has the misfortune of being a mediocre episode wedged into a 4 (or more) episode arc in which all the other installments are fantastic. Many others consider the introduction of Ellen Tigh in Season One's "Tigh Me Up, Tigh Me Down" to be the worst episode of Season 1 and I would agree, but later plot revelations tied to this episode make it quite an important episode indeed, and being the worst episode of the excellent first season does not a terrible episode make. "The Woman King" was meant to be part of a much larger arc that was dropped from the series, leaving it to stand on it's own, when it was never meant to. "A Day in the Life" grates on the nerves, though the fate of a minor character introduced in the episode slightly raises my appreciation of the episode. "Hero" was for the longest time the show's one unmitigated disaster. Almost nothing works in that episode, and I've tried to block it from my mind - and the writers seem to have as well, as the events therin are seldom if ever referenced. "Deadlock", while a slightly better episode than "Hero" is the other disaster of an episode, but it's harder to ignore as it's part of the final arc of the series - and does contain some wonderful scenes, which are disappointingly undercut by sloppy writing (from usually reliable Jane Espenson) and a terrible edit. And again, the episode feels worse for being wedged between 2 excellent episodes, and (to my way of thinking) is the least enjoyable episode after a string of 22 installments without a loser among them. The episode also left me wondering if the finale of BSG was doomed to failure which haunted me for a week until the next installment had aired and everything felt like it was back on track. Hopefully none of the remaining episodes will be added to this list.
Having not seen the final installments, which I hope will be added to this list of winners, I can't list only 5 or 10, and can barely cut it off at 15. So here are my top 15 episodes of BSG:
15 Maelstrom (3x18)
14 Blood on the Scales (4x15)
13 Kobol's Last Gleaming, Part 2 (1x13)
12 Crossroads, Part 2 (3x21)
11 Guess What's Coming to Dinner (4x07)
10 Battlestar Galactica (Miniseries)
09 Sometimes a Great Notion (4x11)
08 Act of Contrition (1x04)
07 No Exit (4x16)
06 BSG: Razor (2x19)
05 Resurrection Ship, Part 2 (2x12)
04 Resurrection Ship, Part 1 (2x11)
03 Pegasus [Extended Cut] (2x10)
02 Unfinished Business [Extended Cut] (3x10)
01 Downloaded (2x18)So many more I'd like to add. Most people seem to rate the episode "33" very high on their lists, and while I love the episode and feel that it's 1 excellent episode in a series of excellent episodes, I connected more to other episodes in the season.
I have to get Mark out of bed soon.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:16 PM
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After I got Mark off to work I responded to e-mail and had lunch while I played Unholy War (which I kicked ass at). I was hoping to go for a walk after that, but I started feeling kind of woozy. I've not been taking my pills that often lately, which is me following my doctor's suggestion. The only down side of this of late is that the pills have started making me sleepy again, which I'd kind of gotten over. Still, I didn't just fall over and sleep. I did the dishes and cleaned the counter tops. I also sorted some recycle stuff, and threw out some expired food.
It's very warm in my room.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:07 PM
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I took a nap. Woke up with a headache, and my stomach upset. It was actually upset this morning but I thought it was from drinking too much soda this week; I haven't had anymore today. Oh well.
I've not heard from Jim in days, though I left him a 'hey' on myspace, and a question on Facebook about his experience at the bar on Wednesday. I'm starting to worry about him. I'll try sending him another message.
BSG is on like 29 minutes. That at least is good news.
When I spoke to Michael the other day, he was worried (or at least thought) that Mark hated him. But Mark seems happy that we're getting along again. He even said something about have Michael & Chris over for cards or something to that effect. I'll have to let Michael know the next time we chat, whenever that will be.
posted by Bald Jason at 09:31 PM
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SPOILERS for tonight's BSG.
Tonight's BSG episode was more set up. My favorite parts of the episode involved Hera & Boomer. We got to see Caprica Six in scenes with Baltar; it's been far too long. Starbuck on the toilet. Ok. More on the Colony. But the episode, just like the last 2, felt like buildup to the finale - and while I was hoping the final shot of this episode would leave me breathless, it mostly just didn't register as much of anything. Adama & Tigh drinking to BSG has lost some of it's impact with Adama drinking and crying every episode. I really don't care about Adama anymore. I want to know the truth about Kara. I want Boomer to be redeemed. I want to know the truth about Hera and the Opera House, and the Head Characters.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:08 PM
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Saturday, March 7, 2009
I stayed in last night. I didn't even consider going out. I watched the most recent 4 episodes of Wolverine & the X-Men, which were mostly awesome. There are only 7 more episodes, 3 of which are devoted to the finale. I love the complexity and the darkness. I love the huge cast of characters. It's definitely a great show for fans of the Marvel Universe. Here are some examples of the characters that we've seen on the series:
Angel / Archangel
Arclight
Avalanche
Beast
Berzerker
Bishop
Blink
Blob
Blockbuster
Boom Boom
Colossus
Dr. Abraham Cornelius
Cyclops
Dazzler
Domino
Dust
Firestar
Emma Frost (I love her!)
Fever Pitch
Forge
Gambit
Harpoon
Hellion
The Hulk / Bruce Banner
Iceman
Jean Grey
Juggernaut
Karnal
Senator Robert Kelly
Kleinstock Brothers
Magma
Magneto
Marrow
Master Mold
Maverick
Melencamp
Mercury
Mister Sinister
Mojo
Colonel Moss
Multiple Man
Mystique
Network (Sarah Vale)
Nick Fury
Nightcrawler
Nitro
Pixie
Polaris
Professor X
Psyloche
Pyro
Quicksilver
Quill
Dr. Kavita Rao
The Reavers
Rockslide
Rogue
Sabretooth
Sauron
Scanner
Scarlet Witch
The Sentinels
Suvik Senyaka
Shaodow King
Shadowcat / Kitty Pryde
Shatter
Silver Samurai
Tildie Soames
Spiral
Squidboy
Storm
Thunderbird
Toad
Bolivar Trask
Vanisher
Vertigo
Wendigo
Wolverine
Warren Worthington II
Wolfsbane
X-23
Mariko YashidaAside from the above charcters, it's rumored that we'll see these other characters in the final 7 episodes:
Apocalypse
Phoenix
Harry Leland
Donald Pierce
Sebastian Shaw
Selene
The Stepford CuckoosWe've also seen other characters in the prequel short Hulk vs. Wolverine:
Deadpool
Omega Red &
Lady DeathstrikeHopefully the 2nd Season continues with the same quality of story and character.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:13 AM
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I finally heard from Jim. He's going through a lot. And much of it seems very dark, despite his smiles and laughter. It's beigining to sound like our positions have been reversed from the first time that we met. I'd like to be upset about, but I find the symmetry of it to be rather hypnotic and poetic. It feels very balanced. I just have to wish him well with the same grace that he showed me back in the day. And thankfully I want have a bitch like Lucas whispering horrible nothings in my ear while I'm doing it. Something to be grateful for.
A few years ago I would have been morose about this development. I would have been crushed and down about it for weeks. But I try to keep the positive stuff and get rid of the negative as much as I can. And I'm really very greatful that we had the talks that we did. That I was able to go in more detail with him why I pushed him away before. I told him the truth at the time, but I was able to demonstrate the truth of my words now. It felt very liberating. It felt like we got a much better ending.
If this is the end, then I can say it was much more satisfying than what I had expected. And if it's not the end; if we somehow come together again, as friends or lovers or in whatever form that would be, then so be it. I can't imagine such a reunion not lending itself to more satisfaction. ;-0)
Interesting. Complete. Smiles and Sadness. And rain. That's what today brings.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:59 PM
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Talk about random music moments. I'm a lover of movie scores and soundtracks. I'm not sure how many of my friends actually know this about me. Today, while playing a game of online Hearts, I happily listened to the 1976 King Kong score by John Barry - bringing back all kinds of memories of the movie that I viewed excitedly as yearly event as a child. Later, in the shower I sang songs from RENT. I know lots of people who love the RENT soundtrack, but King Kong? Not so much. lol.
I like that I'm odd.
I'm almost always very aware of a movie's score / soundtrack. The score music of some movies stays with me long after the movie has ended, and I often times enjoy that music more than the movies themselves. Sometimes the reverse is true, but that's seldom the case.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:20 PM
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Sunday, March 8, 2009
I went to bed around 6pm. It was nice, drifting off to sleep with the sound of the rain, and a distant train. Woke up around 12:30am. Went back to sleep. Woke up around 3am. I read a bit. I'm trying to find a book to read, but nothing seems to interest me lately. I had good dreams. I feel like I'm drifting.
I had a hot dream about Michael. But it was very strange. Lots of bondage and latex. I'm sure he would have loved it.
I tried chatting on gay.com, but found the conversation about the deeper meanings of "The Sweetest Thing" too brain numbing and disappointing to continue.
Apparently we lost an hour tonight. I thought it felt weird, but then I looked at my phone and the time had shifted yet. I asked Mark about this, and then left a message for Mollie, but when I hung up my phone had righted itself. I used to notice these things more when I was working.
Speaking of work, I was thinking about Hollywood Video tonight. I was remembering all kinds of random work details that I've not thought about in months. I was missing it, but there was also I finality to it... The way I remember other jobs that I've had. It was an interesting moment for me.
A week from Friday and BSG will be over. I hear a lot of fans complaining about this, but at this point, I'm ready for it to end. As long as it ends well, I'll be happy. And I'm looking forward to 'The Plan' and the vastly different 'Caprica'. I'm just tired of waiting for the end.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:31 AM
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I ate. I watched 2 more episodes of LOST. I killed a spider. none of it in that order.
posted by Bald Jason at 07:44 AM
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I've sorted a bunch of pix from my e-mail and got rid of TONS more. I've moved on from King Kong. Now I'm listening to the scores of Hellraiser I & II. I can't think of the composer at the moment, but I love his work. He also did the score to Flowers in the Attic, which was the best part of the movie. I'm chatting with Chris on Yahoo, and other peeps on gay.com.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:47 PM
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I was making a list of things from the entertainment industry that I'm looking forward to this year, and several of the items were Star Trek novels. I was taking a break from Star Trek novels, but several of the books coming out this year require me to read volumes that I own and have either read once years ago, or never read at all. And it's not like I'm reading anything right now anyways.
The first new post-series Star Trek: Voyager book in 4 years comes out next month. It's the 5th in a series of books that take place after the series. I read the first 2 when they were new, and I enjoyed them. I started reading the 3rd one but couldn't get into it. I figured I'd just rush through them when a new volume came out, not realizing that it would be several years before that would happen. I'm thinking of rewatching the finale to Voyager and then reading the 4 volumes that I have so I'll be ready for the new one when it arrives. This 5th volume is written by an author that I've enjoyed in the past, and has to deal with many plots that I'm interested in. The author will release a 6th volume late in the year.
I want fritos. lol. I might go to the grocery store later.
In my reading about the things I'm looking forward to this year I discovered an article that I'd missed in which it was revealed that the 2nd Doctor Who special this year will actually be the Christmas Special. This confuses me as they're producing 4 2009 specials (the first airs on Easter), or at least they were. I'd heard rumblings that the final 2 specials were linked, and that they might be held back until late in December, but now it seems they might not air in 2009 at all. If they don't air this year that's 2 less Doctor Who installments in an already nearly Doctorless year. It doesn't help that Torchwood's been trunicated by 8 episodes. It sucks. But if this proves true then this means we'll have 2 extra Who installments next year, with the 10th Doctor no less.
Here's the list I made:
March 13:
Battlestar Galactica: Daybreak, Part 1March 20:
Battlestar Galactica: Daybreak, Part 2
(2 hour Series Finale)Spring / Summer:
Torchwood: Children of Earth
(5 part miniseries)April:
Voyager: Full Circle
(Star Trek novel)New Frontier: Treason
(Star Trek novel)April 12:
Doctor Who: Planet of the DeadApril 21:
Battlestar Galcatica: Season 4.5
(dvd set with extended cuts)Caprica
(unrated extended cut pilot)May:
Vanguard: Open Secrets
(Star Trek novel)May 1:
X-Men Origins: WolverineMay 8:
Star TrekMay 21:
Terminator SalvationMay 26:
Were the World Mine (DVD)June:
Battlestar Galactica: The PlanJuly:
Watchmen:
Tales of the Black Freighter Edition
(3.5 hours)The Next Generation: Losing the Peace
(Star Trek Novel)July 17:
Harry Potter & the Half-Blood PrinceAugust:
The Soul Key
(DS9 Relaunch Novel)Fall:
The Sarah Jane Adventures: Season 3September:
The Never Ending Sacrifice
(DS9 Relaunch Novel)October:
Enterprise: The Romulan War
(Star Trek Novel)Voyager: Unworthy
(Star Trek Novel)November:
Titan: Synthesis
(Star Trek Novel)December:
Vanguard: Precipice
(Star Trek Novel)December 18:
Avatar
(James Cameron Film)December 25:
Doctor Who Christmas Special 2009Other 2009:
Underworld: Rise of the Lycans (DVD)
posted by Bald Jason at 04:43 PM
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Monday, March 9, 2009
I was getting ready to go to the grocery store when I was overcome by the most wretched headache that I've had in at least a year. I started getting migrains when I was in the 4th grade. I remember the first one very clearly; where I was; what I was doing. It wasn't long before I started getting scary symptoms that proved to be common migrain signs: tunnel vision; numb limbs. I used to suffer those symptoms on a regular basis... But for the last 12 years or so, those symptoms have rarely appeared. Well they kicked in yesterday.
It's hard to explain tunnel vision to those who've never experienced it. But it's a kind of blindness. You can see, but you can't. It's very annoying, and very confusing when you don't know what's happening. And even when you do know what's happening, it's hard not to panic as a result. The whole thing is kind of creepy.
Add to that, one of your arms going completely numb. The two symptoms have always arrived in tandom. Though there have been times when I've seen spots just before my vision is compromised...and other times where I see these little silvery lights; like fireworks. The latter has sometimes come and gone without the numbness or even a severe headache, but when I see spots it's time to take my meds and hide in a dark room.
But yesterday I got the headache before my vision went out; before the numb effect. Which...I'm not sure has ever happened before. If it has, it was so many years ago that I've forgotten it.
Having experienced this so vividly yesterday I'm amazed that I dealt with it as well as I did in my youth. This is probably because of my mother. She suffered similar symptoms, and we were perscribed similar drugs to deal with them, so she understood what was going on; I didn't need to convince anyone. Which was probably very helpful.
Anyways - I took my drugs. I hid in the dark. And eventually I slept. Mark woke me up once to check on me, which I understand, but it angered me. I was still suffering and the only way to get rid of that kind of pain is to stay quiet, in the dark, preferably asleep, until it goes away. It's not his fault. I mean, he's only seen me have 1 other migrain like this one before, and that time it freaked him out that I could hardly walk and that I couldn't feel anything in my right arm. He's used to me having severe pain, but these other symptoms take things to a whole new level, for which I've not given him instructions. I'll have to be sure to explain it to him later.
I was thankfully able to get Mark out of the room with a minium of discussion, and no bruised feelings. I slept until around 2am. My head still hurt but nowhere near as bad. I called Mollie, who has left me a message several hours before. We talked briefly about problems that her mother is having and updates in our lives. I told her about my horrible headache experience and she'd recently experienced the tunnel vision herself so she knew exactly what I was talking about. Mollie and I often connect on subjects and levels that I don't get to as easily with other people. She's such a comfort.
I watched the finale of Voyager to prepare for the post-series books. I've watched the finale several times of the years, and I've enjoyed parts of it far more than when it first aired. It's very much a Voyager episode, and so it's a very appropriate ending to that series...but just like the show that it's celebrating...it mostly feels like a wasted opportunity.
I read the first 40 pages of the 1st post series book, "Homecoming". I read it years ago when it was new, and I remember enjoying it. But this time I'm finding it rather trite. It's a fairly good continuation of that final episode, but I don't like the writing style...it's not horrible, but every once in awhile I just don't believe these are the actual characters talking. It's a flaw that has thankfully been mostly absent in the post DS9 books. There has been only 1 post DS9 book that I've felt this way about, but I seem to be the only fan that I know who felt that way, so perhaps it was a fluke? I hope so.
Anyways. I wanted to go to the bank and the grocery store this morning. But my stomach is upset again! My IBS, which has been held at bay (thankfully) for months seems to be giving me troubles again. I suspect many reasons. One cause might be that the pills for my eating helped the process along, and now that I've reduced the number that I take, things are going back to how they were. They seems likely. Also, I've had several horrible headaches this last week, with yesterday's being the worse, so I've taken quite a bit of Midrin this week, only it's not Midrin, it's a generic called Migrazone, which is basically the same thing (I looked it up online), but one I've never taken before. Perhaps there's something in the mix that's upsetting my stomach? I had also been drinking quite a bit of soda this last week, but I stopped that several days ago... Anyways...I'm not happy about this. I might have to take one of my cymbalta pills. Really not looking forward to Zombie Jason
posted by Bald Jason at 08:08 AM
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Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Monday morning I watched some more LOST. Then around 10am I decided I'd get up, get out, and get some groceries. I went to Meijer, but as I was getting off the expressway, the ramp was littered with potholes. It was like a war zone. I managed to dodge most of them...and hit one in what I thought was the lesser of two evils. But it turned out to be bad enough. I made it to Meijer and the tire wasn't completely flat yet, so I was hoping it was ok. I got what I needed from Meijer in about 10 minutes, came back and the tire was definitely flat. I called Mark. I called Suburu Roadside... I talked to this woman, Amy, told her where I was, what section of the parking lot, what end of the store. They said that help would arrive in 40 minutes. I talked to Mark & my Grandmother in that time. 40 minutes later the tow truck driver called to ask if I was in the parking lot or across the road. I told him I was in the parking lot, near the pharmacy. This seemed to confuse him. It turned out they'd sent him to my home instead of where I actually was. He was local and knew where I was and said he'd be there in 30 minutes. Sometimes...when things are bad I get stressed. Then things get worse and I get angry...or start to laugh at the comical badness of it all. Well, first I was angry...and then I was in a good mood. And the sun came out. And the guy arrived just as he said he would and got everything fixed in about 5 minutes. And I was on my way.
I went to Kroger for more groceries, though I felt rushed now that I'd been so put off for time. Also, I was extremely hungry. I kind of rushed through the store. I was worried that I'd make Mark late for work. I went to Little Caesars thinking of pizza, but then decided I didn't want to wait for anything else that day, got crazy bread, and went next door and got some wine. I ate the crazy bread as I drove home.
I got home, got the groceries in, and gave the rest of the crazy bread to Mark. I ate and chilled. Happy to be home. I wandered through wikipedia. Then watched some stuff on youtube. Mark wanted me to go with him to work so I could take the car in to be fixed. But I'd not taken my eating pills, as I knew I was going to be home and so I wasn't prepared to go anywhere without it going badly. Also, I was very tired.
Mark went on his way, and I ended up watching about 7 episodes of The Facts of Life on YouTube. It's amazing how many of those I remembered from when I was little - and I could remember just how I reacted at the time. It was amusing.
I finally fell asleep around 6pm. I figured I'd wake up around 10 or 11 as I've been sleeping 4 or 5 hours at a time lately. I thought I might go to Necto. Only when I woke up it was nearly 3:30am. I couldn't believe it! At first I was disappointed that I didn't get to go to the club, but realized that I was so well rested that I didn't care.
I got up, and found some mail Mark had left at my door. Mark said hello to me, as he was getting ready for bed. I ate and read the mail. Then I wrote this, as I listend to more soundtrack music.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:54 AM
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I feel like rambling. This could go on awhile. I never know where to place commas or where to end paragraphs. Sometimes I think I know, but I'm probably wrong. And other times I know exactly what I'm doing, but I don't give myself enough credit.
A person who I chat with online just told me I give new meaning to multitasking. But really it's just the same old tired meaning. I feel like I'm not getting enough done, even with all that I'm doing here. Because really, it isn't very much at all. The online chat person is a Star Trek fan, who lives in a room across the hall from where I almost lived happily ever after with Mark Daniel Adams. This man said he just wanted to be friends with me in the beginning. He's since confessed that he wants far more than that. In my silence he has apologised. With every word he says to me now, he apologises for his desire.
Another man argues about intent, malice, and how his misspelling of words makes everything ok. I burn with unexpressed rage as I type my responses. Stupidity and the reinforcments of stereotypes. How do I fall into these conversations? "You're never too old to change your thinking", he says. He doesn't see the irony. A double-edged sword that is slamming into my skull. The dull conversation refuses to end. I've got to get out of this space.
I'm listening to Sade and Daft Punk combined in ways not intended by the artists. I'd never heard the Daft song before this Frankenstein musical pastiche. The first time I heard the Sade song, I was 26, sitting on the floor in a gay bar while a drag queen performed. I knew the queen in passing. The song was dedicated to a dead friend of hers, who will forever be remembered as Jezebel. I was rapt. Many friends were in attendance and I was happily coupled. Travis wore his light blue, too tight Strawberry Shortcake shirt. Laurie and the Hillsdale crowd were charmingly impressed. Anytime I hear the Sade song I see this memory and I re-dedicate the song to a queen's dead friend I never knew.
It's raining again. I love the sound of the rain in my room. I'm tempted to go for a walk, but the imagined chill is far more satisfying than reality. Still...temptation waits.
I used to play with broken toys when I was a child. The faded paint and sharp edges appealed to me far more than the shiny new shit, which always seemed to disappoint. The missing fragments were mysteries that kept my attention far longer than storied pieces of plastic that gave away their answers far too easily. It's how I prefer my men. Pitted. Scarred. Damaged. Does this mean that men are only toys?
I was a broken amusement myself once. Broken boys playing games. Action figures trying to piece together the perfect solution. Men struggling to fit together, when the pieces left to them don't amount to much. Perhaps I am still a broken toy. People play with me for awhile and then they grow up.
Have you ever been haunted by a story that someone told you? A real memory of theirs that stays with you long after they told you, and even longer after they actually experienced it? Some piece of their life that somehow exists parallel to your own... just out of reach, but always there.
My sister used to tell me her dreams, and I remember them like they're my own. We always had odd things in common anyway. Her dreams haunt me.
And there were these kids I met in a hospital... They haunted me for years after. I forget them most of the time now, but sometimes the memories of them come flooding back.
And then there's this boy I dated about seven years ago, and everything about him haunts me like that. It's far more intense than the others though. It's not like anything else really. All his stories and adventures...they criss cross across my life, but are achingly separate from my own experiences. Everytime I've touched him I've cherished it. Every time I've seen his world I've been transported beyond my life. And this wave of feeling is so overwhelming that I invariably come crashing down in a heap on the floor of my odd little existance.
Now I read his myspace blog. His stories are poetry. His words inspire and sadden me. His every little gesture is maddening. And did I mention he's beautiful? He's wicked handsome. He's not one of those perfect fags that hurt my eyes just to look at them. He's perfectly imperfect.
I took a break from this entry to write a poem about him. Then I took another break to send it in an e-mail. I'll close this off with what I wrote:
Hey Sean,
Long time no chat. I almost called you today. I still might. I'm odd like that. Though it occurs to me, that I don't know where my fucking phone is. Oh well.
I was reading your blog today. I like it. A lot. I wish you'd written more.
I was trying to write about you today. You have this effect on me that nobody else does, and I'm not sure how to express it without sounding lame. I'm not sure that I understand it myself. But all the things you've told me about; stories and dreams and reviews of songs you like and books that you've read - they stay with me. It's almost overwhelming. Like every little boring bit of your life is some amazing dream I'm having and never want to wake from. I was at EMU the other day and I couldn't help remembering the stories you spoke about living around there.... I found myself looking around and wondering. It's this ache. I get it everytime something like that happens. I get it when I see anything assoiciated with you. And I don't get that with any other ex of mine, or friend of mine. And I don't know why that is, or what it is, but it's a powerful sensation. It's this huge wave of emotion that I can't identify. I don't know what it means. But I'm grateful for it. There's an intense sadness mixed up in it all. I'm not sure why. But I'm grateful that I'm feeling it. It's wondrous.
You are wondrous.
And I'm jealous of anyone that gets to see you all the time. And I'm grateful that I've gotten to know you. And I'm happy that I got to see you back in October. It doesn't seem that long ago really, unless I really think about it, and then it seems like too long indeed.
Bald Jason
Anyways - I wrote this for you:
SEAN
You're not like any other man I've ever tasted.
When we come together it's like my heart skips
and my stomach explodes
and the world stops just to tell us that it wasn't meant to happen.Only it did.
And the world can suck it."Fuck you motherfucker."
Having you was a small victory
but the world won the war.And now I catch memories of you between my sheets;
between leaves in the trees;
between teardrops and rain.Everything about you is a foreign country
filled with simple splendor and aching surrender.Please keep breathing.
Please keep writing.
Please keep sharing.I might not be there to see your everything...
But I fucking love your ghost.Written By Jason Wright
March 10, 2009
posted by Bald Jason at 07:02 PM
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Wednesday, March 11, 2009
I went to bed around 9pm. I woke up briefly at 1:30am. I actually woke up several brief times during the night, but the 1:30 time was the only one where I got out of bed. I went right back to sleep and woke up at 5:30am. I feel rested. I don't know why I'm back to sleeping around 8 hours, but I'm happy with it. I just have to change the pattern slightly so I can be awake for BSG on Friday.
I had a whole host of interresting dreams. The first one I had, which I remembered each time I woke, and tried to remember each time, involved me befriending the nosferatu like vampire from the first adaptation of Salem's Lot, Mr. Barlow. He arrived in my bedroom one night and while he was frightening we slowly became friends. lol. Mark didn't trust him, and put my handcuffs on him, but he snapped them apart without even trying. He was actually a sad creature. And when he left I found he had never really been here, but that I'd been reading his tale in a book of short stories, which I then went to look for at the early 90's version of the Ann Arbor Borders...with my gramdmother. A later dream involved me defending my family from giant animals at our family home.
I had this wordpad document, unsaved, on my desktop. I'd been working on a long winded response on a Trek forum for the last few days that I wanted to be perfect. I should have saved it. I also made a note of my friends upcoming birthdays from online on the same wordpad. But when I woke up my computer had restarted. And so the entire thing is gone now. I've got this security thing that sends updates and if I'm not awake to stop it, it restarts my computer. I should know by now that I should save stuff, but I'm still angry at the system. I'm going to see if I can have it removed. It used to appear on my screen as an icon when there was an update and I could do whatever I needed to do before clicking on it...I'll see if I can get it back to that setting.
posted by Bald Jason at 05:43 AM
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New movies on DVD I want to see include "Milk", "The Boy in the Striped Pajamas", "Let the Right One In". The thing is, I don't want to rush out and get them per say. If I had the money I'd buy them, so they were just waiting for me to pick them up...but I don't. Oh well.
I had my soundtrack music on random play, and as I wrote "The Boy in the Striped Pajamas" the theme from Schindler's List came on. Perfect.
posted by Bald Jason at 08:05 AM
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Having heard the theme to Schindler's List earlier, I decided to read up on the Holocaust. Something I've never done before. I've never even seen Schindler's List before. I've seen parts of it. I found it so disturbing (and so powerful) that I couldn't watch, even though I know how it ends. I've seen several other Holocaust themed movies, such as "Aimee & Jaguar", "Bent", "The Einstein of Sex", "Facing Windows", "Paragraph 175" & "Walk on Water". I even own all but 1 of those titles, and I recommended 2 of them many times to customers at Hollywood Video. And I have other movies that deal with other aspects of World War II such a "For a Lost Soldier", "Head in the Clouds", & "Mrs. Henderson Presents". But I've never really studied the Holocaust. This morning I did. And I wept. For a good hour. And now my eyes are sore.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:37 PM
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I helped Mark carry a computer out to the car. I'd seen how sunny it was outside, and thought I might go for a walk. That's so not happening now. The wind chill is terrible, and it's very windy.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:38 PM
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For mildly amusing time do a google search for Dr. Manhattan Penis. Just listen to all the whining "straight" men who are uncomfortable seeing a penis in a movie theater. It's not even realistic. It's blue. It glows. And even if it were the real deal, what kind of guy freaks out over seeing a dick? I don't get it.
posted by Bald Jason at 05:11 PM
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I dislike my baggy eyes. I've always got these bags under my eyes. Or...I've often had them, throughout my life. I dislike them. And I wanted to express that.
posted by Bald Jason at 06:20 PM
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Thursday, March 12, 2009
I went to bed around 7pm again last night. I woke up around 1am, and went right back to bed. I woke up around 5:30am, but stayed in bed for another hour, thinking about the dreams I'd had.
posted by Bald Jason at 06:40 AM
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I lay in my room with memories flickering like candle flames. Moments I've not thought of in years are clear...precise. People I no longer understand who used to matter. The flames hurt my eyes.
Kellie plays "Some Kind of Stranger" while she laces up her boots. Her father stops in to say hello, wishing us well, a decade before I find him giving head to some tired old cowboy outside the gay bookstore. Kellie shows me her photography and drinks cheap red wine. I never could stomach the red, but the white has grown on me.
Back in 2000, a week after Shawn and Maggie and Laurie made me so very happy, I wandered downtown and laid down in the vivid green grass, in the diag, just as we'd done the week before... Only Shawn was insane now...and I was a pale imitation of Kellie who used to wander the Ann Arbor night, drunk and hungry for lusty kisses. That's what I thought that night as I wandered. I've become Kellie now. I should get some cigarettes.
I remember my first night in this room. There was no furnature. For a long time the computer sat on the floor. That's how it was then. Exchanging e-mails with two uncomprehending women; a liar and a goddess. But the first night was magic with the promise of new adventures just over a year before sickness robbed me of hope.
I've not been taking my magic pills lately. Yet the magic lingers. Perhaps I'm cured? Why doesn't this make me happy? Maybe because the pain pills aren't working. At least I can keep them down now. So many pills. All of them perscribed. I've always been such a good boy.
In my mind I'm painting surrender in cigarette smoke. Cloves. People I know and loved in passing wander by and tell me not to jump. I'm nowhere near the edge, but they can't seem to see the truth. The candle flames blind them I guess.
Memories become stories and memories of stories. Stories that ended become dreams. Dreams become wishes. And wishes are just desires made palatable, respectable & marketable. Apparently, wishes are desires made able. How odd.
I see washed out boyfriends at their worst and give them a smile. I invite them in. Give them a smoke and a white zinfandel kiss. A laugh and a snuggle.
Maybe today won't be so bad after all...
Is it so crazy to be haunted by the living?
posted by Bald Jason at 10:22 AM
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Friday, March 13, 2009
I stayed awake most of yesterday posting multiple posts in a Trek forum. I kid you not. Oh. And bonding with other GLBT Trek fans. Oh. And arguing with asshole Trek fans who call sexually active women "whores". I'm a geek. I know this.
I also chatted with Michael & Chris some more. And stayed up way later than I have been. And woke up far earlier as well. I've been up for about 4 hours. I went to bed around 1:30am. Looks like my 8-10 hour sleeping fests are fucked up again. Oh, well. It was nice while it lasted.
I wanted to stay up though as I was both jazzed about my Trekkie Bliss, but also I wanted to make sure I'd be awake tonight for part 1 of the BSG finale! Argh. I'm cautiously excited for these last 3 hours. It looks like they saved a good percentage of BSG awesomeness for the finale. :)
posted by Bald Jason at 09:00 AM
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Dude. I can't get to sleep. This is annoying.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:19 PM
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I'm still awake. WTF?
Looks like I won't be sleeping until 11pm at the earliest. Blah.
posted by Bald Jason at 08:14 PM
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BSG was weird. I won't really know what to make of it until the rest of the finale airs next week. I think I liked it, but it's hard to be sure. lol. Parts of it seemed ambitious, yet feel disjointed without the payoff from the rest of the finale. I'm jealous of Mollie, who'll be seeing the last 12 episodes in one big push. And I'm even more jealous of later fans who'll see these episodes for the first time, on dvd with the extended cuts, without commercials, with THE PLAN, and everything that comes in the future.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:11 PM
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Monday, March 16, 2009
Friday night, I didn't get to bed as soon as I'd have liked, as Mark got home before I could get to sleep, and he felt like talking and cuddling, which was ok. It was nice actually.
Saturday. Mark & I cuddled some more. Later we went to his work to get some of his tax information. We went to Hillards to get water and other stuff. We saw Michael. I talked to DJ on the phone; Hollywood is taking him to court saying they don't owe him unemployment!?! Fuckers. Was still good to hear DJ's voice. Mark & I ate at Little Caesars. A great day with Mark. We still have them sometimes. lol.
Later Saturday night and into Sunday morning my stomach was killing me. It was odd, because I was suffering symptoms that I used to have to deal with every day, and it just struck me how amazing it is that I survived for 7 years dealing with that bullshit. It was horrible, but revelatory.
Sunday. Mark & I went for a walk. It started out alright, but we hit this trail that I like, and it was beyond muddy. It was crazy. We decided to hike up the hill to the road and head home that way, only I got caught in this mudslide (mud all over me) and sliced my arm open. I wouldn't have thought anything of it when I was a kid, but now I'm old, out of shape, and a bit of a pussy. On our way back home, we visited this park I've always wanted to stop at, and found a cool enclosed sidewalk path that took us back to our street. Showering the muck from my wound and dousing it with alcohol was very UN FUN. lol. But we just wrote it off to our little adventure.
Sunday night Mark was able to get the final 7 episodes of Wolverine for me, but I still haven't watched them.
This morning I watched 2 episodes of Brothers and Sisters; there are 4 more that I haven't seen. Later I finished off the most recent season of Nip/Tuck. Mark changed my bandage before he went to work. I napped later.
Also over the weekend I chatted with Michael and Chris at random intervals. I dealt with a 14yo boy who's prone to using a fake e-mail addy that just happens to be mine. I didn't hunt him down or anything, I just figured out who the fuck he was, and let it go for now. I also spent a lot of time on this Star Trek forum. I made a new online friend named Jonathan, who's gay, and lives in NC. Plus I posted about all sorts of Trek stuff, and I think I made some other friends too, as several people seemed to respond to the things I had to say.
I'm wondering if I should shave off my beard, which hasn't even been trimmed in two weeks. I feel like Grizzley Adams.
posted by Bald Jason at 08:46 PM
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Tuesday, March 17, 2009
I shaved and showered; got pretty and went to Necto. My ex-bf (from 5 years ago) Matt was there, with his friend Emily, and some other friends. I met one of them, but I didn't quite catch her name in the loudness of the bar. I danced. I talked to Jim and Simon (the latter boy I just met, and made out with - 21). Simon is part gay. lol. It all amused me. Everything amused me, but I was asleep last night at this time, so I was tired most of the night.
posted by Bald Jason at 02:29 AM
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I snapped a few pictures and uploaded a new gay.com pic. I've been trying to keep up to date with my pix there. Karen was chatting there, incognito. It was nice to chat with her...but I'm exhausted. I still need to shower the sweat and smoke of the bar off me. Blah.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:29 AM
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I just found out that some of the episodes I need of Brothers and Sisters, and Desperate Housewives are probably NOT available anymore. Damn it. :-0( This is a sad note to end my 'day' on.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:49 AM
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I slept until around 10am. I watched 4 Wolverine & the X-Men episodes before I slept. I watched the final 3 parter when I woke up. A fantastic ending to an amazing season. This series would make a really great dvd box set. The series is heavily serialized, and the end of the season is a huge payoff to stories throughout the season. Sometimes you think you know something, and then you don't. It's the best X-Men series ever, IMO.
Some things that I loved about the series is that it wasn't overwhelmed by the Phoenix / Jean Grey plot, and yet both were used, and actually added in new elements from the comics that I've never seen dramatized before. Like, I know my friend Mollie hates Jean Grey, but she might like this series as Jean is in maybe 10 of the 26 episodes, if that. And the Phoenix story is only played out in about 6 of them, though it's far more subtle than previous adaptations. Emma Frost is my favorite character. The series has a huge cast, but doesn't let anyone overwhelm the main plot; the characters are all used well, and there is some really strong character development. I hope the 2nd Season (currently in preproduction) can match the quality of the first. This felt a lot more like the comics than previous attempts, and the series didn't shy away from the complex characters, and the darkness found in many of the stories.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:07 PM
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I had one of my headaches, but it's mostly gone now. I'm having trouble signing in to gay.com, which sucks. I posted on the Trek forum.
Oh. So...spoilers for all episodes through "No Exit". This spoiler is actually for the last episode, but it's something that Ron Moore WANTS us to know before seeing it. So...people have seen through "No Exit" feel free to read this; others can ignore it.
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This Ron Moore quote is from the podcast for "Islanded in a Stream of Stars":"...I should probably say as a sidenote -- I know that there is a tremendous amount of speculation out there on the Internet -- that Kara is the daughter of Daniel or that Daniel, Daniel being the Cylon model that was killed or destroyed or aborted, however you want to choose to define it, by Cavil, that there's a connection between Daniel and Kara and that's part of the revelations that we're gonna reveal in the finale. I don't typically want to, like, put theories to rest, because it kinda spoils the enjoyment and fun of people in the show, however I do think it's worth saying that that is not part of the plan.
In this particular case, I don't want people to really be distracted through the finale by this other idea which has gained a tremendous amount of currency on the Internet and among fan circles and that's probably my own fault, because I don't think I realized the impact that the backstory of Daniel would have in "No Exit." I sort of thought that it was an interesting story about, that defined something about Brother Cavil, or John Cavil, and his backstory and how he reacted to the threat of someone else being as beloved as he was. It was a sorta Cain and Abel type allegory. All those reasons, -- I just thought it was an interesting piece of backstory, but in recent weeks I've realized that the Cult of Daniel has grown and there's a tremendous amount, there's a LOT of people out there who are now investing a tremendous amount of time and energy and thought into the notion that Daniel is really a powerful figure in the show and mythos and is directly related to Kara, and I don't want anyone listening to this podcast -- I don't want you to go into the finale with your Daniel-hopes up too high, because that's really not part of the plan. And again, I apologize if people think that that was such a gigantic mislead or clue or something. That was not the intent and I don't think I anticipated how strongly that would be grabbed by people."
And there you have it. Daniel is not key to the finale, and he has no relation to Kara.
posted by Bald Jason at 07:42 PM
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Wednesday, March 18, 2009
I spent yesterday in a daze. I did eventually clean my room a bit, and read. I watched the news, including a bit about Britney's 'If You Seek Amy' video, which amused me. I've never been a huge fan, but I'm not a hater. Mark on the other hand can't stand her chipmunk voice.
Speaking of Mark, he kindly tracked down some tv episodes I needed, so I got to see the last 4 Brothers & Sisters episodes this morning before I went to bed.
I only slept about 5 hours. I got Mark up for work. I watched the final 2 episodes of The L Word, and then watched a special about the show. I didn't love or hate the finale, and it struck me that there are almost NO finales that I love. There's DS9. I enjoyed 'Epilogue' for the DCAU. I think of Star Trek VI as the finale to Classic Trek, and I like that well enough. And I like 'Serenity' as the finale of Firefly. I thought the final episodes of Buffy & Angel were both pretty flawed. Alley McBeal was ok. ALIAS sucked. I love the last episode of Dawson's Creek (I know; shoot me). And the 'Sex & the City' Movie seemed like a good wrap for the series (though they're making another one). I hated the endinging of Seinfeld, and if I'd been a fan of Sopranos I'd probably hate that one too.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:15 PM
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I got dressed and took a walk around the block. While walking I called Janice (who had to leave right then), my Grandmother (for a long, fun conversation), and left messages for Jennifer, Mollie & Tony. It was a nice walk, and the weather was nice, but it got pretty dark towards the end and looks like it might rain; I'm glad I got out when I did.
I guess I should also note that 17 years ago today (back when I was 17) I cut my wrist with a razor and ended up in a hospital for 13 days, which had a profound impact on my life. It's weird to think that I've doubled my age since then. That's incredible to me.
posted by Bald Jason at 05:40 PM
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I chatted with Paul Ferguson and Bobby on gay.com. Also chatted with Michael briefly. Later I watched 'Psycho Beach Party' on LOGO; I'd seen it years before. I took a brief nap. My stomach wasn't feeling that great; I blame the toast I had earlier. Later I clicked on CNN and read that Natasha Richardson died today. I had to look up her movies because I knew I'd seen her in something recently. What I saw her in was "Evening"; I own it. Her sister Joley plays Julia on Nip/Tuck. Natasha was married to Liam Neeson. :0(
posted by Bald Jason at 09:51 PM
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Thursday, March 19, 2009
I went to bed around 3am. I woke up at 8am. I wanted to sleep more, but I'd promised Mark I'd bring his new paper shredder in from the car as he hurt his back the other day. Mark & I were both tired and grumpy. I got the paper shredder in and sat on the couch for about 40 minutes trying to decide if I wanted to sleep or get some groceries. I got groceries. Then I stayed up so I could wake Mark up for work at 12:30. In that time I talked on the phone with my nephews, who had the day off of school. After Mark left I took a 20 minute nap. I chatted online with my ex-bf Paul, and Bobby. I updated some Doctor Who stuff. I updated my BSG page devoted to "The Plan" (spoilers for Season 4.5), and shared that with Bobby.
Oh. About tomorrow's finale to BSG. Not that anyone reads this, but the episode starts at 9pm, and isn't 2 hours after all; it's 2 hours and 11 minutes. Hopefully it's a satisfying ending.
Paul & were talking about seeing movies, and I told him that Mollie was my movie bud and that I don't see many movies since she moved. I saw 2 movies last year, and I haven't seen any this year. He put forth that he'd like to be my replacement movie buddy, but I don't really have any movies I want to see until May, except maybe Watchmen, and he's seeing that in the Imax on Saturday. Regardless of all that, we're planning on hanging out Tuesday night.
I tried watching some Robotech earlier, but I get disinterested in the early episodes because I've seen them so many times. I'd would probably be better if I stared a few discs in, but I don't like the idea of skipping ahead.
I'm listening to Radiohead. Snacking. I want to take another nap. Or read. Or watch LOST, or something. I'm not sure.
posted by Bald Jason at 09:05 PM
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Friday, March 20, 2009
I read more Robotech last night; I'm still having trouble sticking to any single book this year. At least I'm reading a lot; I'm just not finishing anything. lol
I slept well. About 5 hours. I woke up because our car alarm was going off. The sensor in the door is fucked up and it's messing with other stuff - or that's the theory.
I stayed up reading the news, and commenting on facebook. I then updated more webpage stuff (more BSG & Who). I got Mark up for work, and I started making my fun lists. I'm reworking my opinions on how Seasons 31 & 32 of the whoniverse will play out, which is actually impossible to tell as I don't have nearly enough info to figure it out, but it's still fun. I'm such a geek.
In less than 8 hours I'll be watching the series finale of BSG. I was worried about loose ends, but a tv guide person who's already seen the finale had this to say:
"So many questions will be answered — including some you probably thought wouldn't be addressed due to time constraints."
I hope that's true, and that the series ends well. That's all I want.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:27 PM
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I sorted some pictures. I worked on my webpage. I had a shake. Apparently I just can't have icecream anymore. It makes me sick, the way I used to be sick all the time. Friends should remind me of this when I get a craving for icecream. Blah.
The finale of BSG stars in 1 hour and 17 minutes.
I'm ready, but I'm not. Every week I wait for the new episode, and then everytime a new one arrives I can't believe it's happening. I can only imagine this sensation will be increased with tonight's episode which isn't just super long episode, but also the finale of the series. I'm able to enjoy these things far more on DVD, but I just can't wait for that this time.
posted by Bald Jason at 07:43 PM
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10 minutes and counting.
posted by Bald Jason at 08:50 PM
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So I've seen the finale to BSG; the tv version anyways. Part I should have aired with Part II. I think it said a lot of important things. Not everything was explained as I wanted them to be, yet I think I like that. I think I will come to love the ending of this series, very much. One thing that wasn't explained...it was explained, but...not. And I think I like that a lot. And I wouldn't have expected that. Still, I look forward to rewatching the DVD extended edit (I've heard about several deleted scenes), with DVD quality imagery. And it will be interesting to see the beginning of the series now that we've seen the end (and had those flashbacks explain certain things). I'm only waiting for the extended dvd cut of "The Plan" before I rewatch the series again. They showed a new trailer for Caprica which looked pretty good, and also the first trailer for the The Plan. I'm excited to see both.
posted by Bald Jason at 11:42 PM
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Saturday, March 21, 2009
Mark got home. I was worried because he was so late. I was thinking I might go to Necto. A friend of mine had invited me, and I said I might go. I shaved my head. Then Mark finally got home, and said that the sensor in our passenger door is so bent up, and that it's my fault for doing that - and that 'they' probably won't fix it. I don't deny that I've closed the door on my seatbelt, and my jacket before, but Mark has done this too; I've seen him do it. I can only remember it happening once, but still. He says that never happened. I remember being surprised when it happened, and sharing a look with him, of good natured humor. I was proud of myself for not making a big deal about it, only in retrospect maybe if I had it would be more memorable for him. Only there's no way to know as his memory is so fricking bad, and listens to things so selectively that it's impossible to know what he will or will not remember. It's something I've struggled with ever since I met him. The good far outweighs the bad, but it doesn't stop the bad from hurting. Anyways; my stomach hurts now, and it's not a good idea for me to go the bar now. Thanks Mark.
Mark came to my door while I was typing that and talked some more. He told me about his crappy day... This while I was shaking at his callous accusation. He ordered a gift for his dad on Amazon, but then found a better version of the gift, but his order was already placed. That sucks. A callous person would say that he should have looked at all his options before ordering, but I simply told him that sucks, and agreed with his statement that instead of buying 2 versions of the same gift (a socket wrench set), that he would be best served by getting a different tool altogether. This while my stomach was roaring.
I was having a really great night until Mark got home. I love him, but he hurts me sometimes. I don't think he means to, most of the time, but it still hurts. I know that I hurt him to. I think all close relationships are sometimes hurtful, to some degree. I just shouldn't let this bother me.
I told Mark that I liked BSG but I don't think he will. It's just a feeling, but perhaps I'm wrong. Maybe he'll enjoy it. I don't really know. Parts of it were very moving. And I think I'll find those things even more moving now that I know they are coming, and what the payoffs are. Perhaps I'll post a spoiler rich review later.
I think I want to read my robotech book. I'm tempted to go get a hug from Mark. I always want a hug from Mark when we aren't getting along. I mean, I often want to hug Mark when we are getting along, but I always want to hug him when we aren't getting along.
We had an interesting conversation the other day. I referred to him as my brother, and he said that he hates it when I do that. That he wants me to desire him. And I told him that I do, but that put those feeling away...and keep them buried, because if I had those feelings on display all the time, that living with him, and not having him would drive me crazy. He said that he understood the words that I was saying and that he believed that I believed them, but that he couldn't comprehend my meaning. We definitely have a very interesting relationship.
17 years ago, when I was 17, I was in the hospital. And we watched "Ferris Bueller's Day Off". If I'd remembered that earlier I would have rented it. A week later we watched "Drop Dead Fred". I also remember that the weekend before my arrival they had watched "The Sound of Music"; I remember them talking about how the girls wanted to watch it, but that the girls eventually went to bed and the boys stayed up to finish it. I remember watching Saved by the Bell, and the A Team. Eating Oreos. Drinking iced tea. Playing bullshit in the kitchen at those little tables with my dead friends. There was a ping pong table in that room. I played against Mike before they let us go to school. I wasn't allowed at first as I was on suicide watch, and Mike Neal wasn't because he'd made an escape attempt. He was crazy. And there was Alan, who was only 12 years old. The older kids tried to convince him that they'd started a club where you wore all your clothes inside out, and I stopped him from turing his tennis shoes inside out. I remember Rachel was exactly 2 years younger than me; we had the same birthday. Michelle was born around Halloween. Bryan was born July 24, 76; I always remember because I thought he said July 4th at first. Those are the only birthdays I'm aware of. There was Joe Egan from Canada. Christine Deppa. Amy. Heather. Jason Green. Amanda. Rhonda. Ron. Names come back to me...and I can hear their voices right now. That's unusual. Usually I don't remember them anymore. I remember my room with hard bed. And my bonding with others I met later that had stayed there; some of who were even crazier than I'd have expected. I remember some woman helping the kids to make pizza from scratch. I remember the Educational Therapy teacher (Pat), and how I once ran into her at gas station in Milan; she said that she drove past my parents house all the time and would think of me; I think she lived in Briton (MI), or around there. Remember playing wallyball to deal with my anger. Mom got me ball to use after I got out and I bounced it off the barn that is no longer there. Grandma got me Oreos. And I bought Ferris Bueller's Day Off on video. It all made me sad. I used to talk to Mike, Rhonda, & Bryan on the phone. I traded letters with Christine. I ran into Amy & Heather at school. This tidal wave of memories is coming fast and hard now...it's a bit overwhelming.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:56 AM
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I got my hug from Mark and I told him some hospital stories that he's probably heard before. It was nice. He downloaded the finale to BSG. Maybe I'll watch the highlights.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:10 AM
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I ended up not watching highlights from the finale to BSG. I started to, but realized that I don't really want to rewatch it until it comes time to see the extended cut, or when I rewatch the entire series. It would be nice if I could wait until I have the extended cut of The Plan as well, and I might not even have to wait that long as the date of BSG 4.5 on DVD hasn't ever been confirmed; maybe it will be moved to the fall as well.
I read more Robotech instead.
I talked to Mark about the finale when he was done watching it. He pretty much hated it, as I suspected he would. He even hated things that I thought were awesomme. Maybe I'll hate it the next time I watch it. I don't know. We'll see.
I'm tired.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:40 AM
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Sunday, March 22, 2009
The more I think about the BSG finale the more I think it's just ok, as opposed to fantastic. There are things that I really like about it, and things that I don't. The series didn't jump the shark in the finale; pretty much everything that happened was supported by previous moments in the series. But I think they could have taken it in a different direction and provided a far more satisfying conclusion. As it stands it's an ok finale to a fantastic series. I don't love or hate it. But I wanted to love it. I'll reexamine it when I get the extended cuts and the movie and get to rewatch some stuff.
I had a really nice Saturday. I slept pretty well, until the car alarm woke me up again. Mark took a shower and the alarm went off again (it stops for awhile and then starts again) - I shut it off. I started reading Robotech. I'm liking the characters again now. It's nice spending time with Lisa and the bridge gang; I look forward the character development to come.
Mark went to run some errands and came home with crazy bread (which was really good). We ate and conversed. Later I took a nap, which was also nice. Sometimes if I eat a lot of bread it upsets my stomach but that didn't happen this time, which was a nice surprise.
I jacked off and showered. I cleaned my room a bit. Later I posted on the Trek forum, and chatted with Chris. He had told me a few weeks ago that he'd like to chill with me sometime without Michael; I'm guessing to kind of even the playing field, which I totally get. I told him when I'm free this week; perhaps we'll hang out. The 3some idea is growing on me. I'm still not sure it will happen, but I've not ruled it out yet. Things seem to be going well for Chris and Michael, so that at least is cool. I like this new friendship with them, and our frank discussions. Michael's mom is going to be in town sometime this week; I like her.
Later, Wendy & Jeff came to visit. Mark joined us in my room and we talked about old times, new times, Mollie, Paul, BSG, Doctor Who, Torchwood, Sarah Jane, Buffy, Angel, Firefly, Harry Potter, Star Trek - basically lots of GEEK. It was fun. Wendy looks amazing. The visit was great, but short, as they were pretty exhausted.
I had a headache from laughing so much. I took some Midrin and ate. I chatted online and surfed the web.
I don't really have plans for today. Monday night I may go to Necto. Tuesday evening I'm hanging out with my ex-bf Paul. We've been chatting, and on good terms for years now. We always talk about hanging out, and apparently it's happening on Tuesday. Nice.
Friday, Mark & I have eye doctor appointments; hopefully that all goes well.
3 of my TV shows (Pushing Daisies, The L Word, & BSG have ended). The first season of Wolverine is over. Nip/Tuck's 5th season has ended. The Closer's season has ended. That leaves Desperate Housewives (which I'm way behind on), Brothers and Sisters, Ugly Betty (which I'm behind on and considering giving up), The Doctor Whoniverse (which is not currently showing anything), Heroes (which I've given up on), True Blood (which is between seasons), Secret Diary of a Call Girl (which is between seasons), and Smallville (which is having it's strongest season in years).
I'm tired.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:27 AM
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Still awake, but barely.
posted by Bald Jason at 05:43 AM
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Monday, March 23, 2009
I did get some sleep on Sunday; enough to enjoy the day. After I woke I chatted with Michael, and then later, Chris. Mark & I went for a walk, which thankfully did not involve any mudslides or blood loss. We wandered the blocks of houses in the area, pointing out the oddities of the buildings and trees; enjoying the look of our world from a new angle. It was a good time, but the cold air on my ears and jaw gave me a headache. I took some midrin and some prilosec when we got home then we went to Little Caesars, where the food was better than I expected. We've been going to that Little Caesars for 12 years, so we know a lot of the people that work there, and it was nice to chat with them.
The combination of the drugs and the large (for me) meal made me feel like I was flying. Sometimes when I combine food with my pills they hit me a lot harder, though I've never really nailed down exactly what combination brings that sensation on. I went from having horrible head pain, to feeling like I was flying. Mark realized that he had forgotten his wallet so we headed back home for that.
We went to Hillards for water and wine. Michael was just going on his break so he wandered and chatted with us. It was nice. Later, he rang us up, and when we left I thought we might hug, though we didn't. It felt like we were going to though. I invited Michael & Chris to come over if they got their studies done in time. After I loaded up the car, I pushed my cart back inside and was shocked to see Nate (Michael's old friend, and my ex-bf Paul's ex-bf. lol) talking to Michael. He saw me though he didn't return my wave. Whatever. Michael later told me that he didn't know that Nate was there, but that he just turned around and there he was.
We went to Meijer, but I was too 'stoned' to leave the car. We went to Kroger. We came home. I got a myspace message from Sean Mobley, telling me stuff I can't repeat here, but it boiled down to him needing to touch base on the phone, so I responded then gave him a call. We had a fun conversation, though he was a bit out of it. It's always great to hear from him, and be there for him. He raved about Lady Gaga and about a mashup he wanted but couldn't find (which I tracked down in like 5 minutes). He talked about his new sort-of-boyfriend Dillon. About his coworkers and his issues. It was a great conversation with a lot of fun, and some honest emotion. I had to let him go so he could sleep.
While I was on the phone with Sean I got messages from Bobby, Michael & Chris. M&C couldn't make it over as it was pretty late and they needed to head to bed. Bobby went to sleep shortly thereafter as well.
Oh. And I fell in love with this song. It's like a lesbian sequel to Katy Perry's "I Kissed a Girl". This one is by Jen Foster and it's called "I Didn't Just Kiss Her". You can hear it on her myspace page.
I'm working on a list of the things that I liked and disliked about the finale of BSG, which I'll probably post when it's done. I read an article that talked about the extended cut, and from what was revealed there I'm going to really enjoy all the new bits which feature flashbacks explaining how the Boomer / Chief relationship started, how Helo came to like Boomer, + a scene where Chief & Kara confront Adama. Those scenes won't fix the things I dislike about the finale, but they'll add a lot of stuff that I do like, and that's cool.
After all the chatting ended, I surfed the net until I could barely keep my eyes open. It was about 6am. I read a few chapters of Robotech, which I'm enjoying a great deal. It's like spending time with old friends. Perhaps I'll expand my Robotech page. Hmmm.
I slept until about 1pm. I got to chat with Mark for a bit before he went to work, then I read more news. Played a game, and then wrote this.
One of those news items I found was this one, which almost makes me want to start collecting GLBT movies again. If I had the money I would. It was a similar piece about Alexander that inspired me last time. Even if I don't throw myself into the fray, there are several GLBT inclusive titles I'm looking forward to owning: 'Nick & Nora's Infinite Playlist', 'Watchmen', 'Were the World Mine' spring to mind, though there are are many more.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:47 PM
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I ate, watched the new Brothers & Sisters, and talked to Mollie on the phone. She might be moving into a house with her brother, mother & Greg. Her work has tried to fire her a few times. Also, she's not having her thyroid removed as it has proved to not be the reason behind her fainting; they think it's her heart and they're doing tests and things; she wears a heart monitor at all times. She's on an antidepressant. She sounds good, for all the crappy things that are going on. She assured me that she's not laying down roots in hell; the house will be rented, and she'll be back home as soon as this all blows over. I hope I get to see her again. We also bonded over the suck that is AVP:R.
posted by Bald Jason at 06:46 PM
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I read more Robotech. I slept.
Looks like BSG 4.5 probably won't be out until July. :-0(
posted by Bald Jason at 09:51 PM
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Tuesday, March 24, 2009
I didn't go to Necto. I didn't feel like dancing, and it was chilly outside. I watched most of an episode of Robotech with Mark ("Dana's Story") so he could see the Max/Myria relationship in action; he was amused by bits I think. I watched the two latest episodes of Smallville, which I enjoyed. Smallville isn't anywhere near the best series on television, but it's entertaining, and this season is a huge improvement over last season, which was pretty much the worst season of the series, which the current one is my favorite.
I find myself (aside from the lack of a sex life) quite happy to be single. So happy that I'm able to converse with a number of my ex-bf's who are all happily coupled, and it doesn't even enter my thoughts to be jealous. At all. It's wacky. Nice & wacky. ;-0)
I like the way my beard looks like right now.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:22 AM
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I read some Robotech before bed. I went to bed around 6am I think, after taking a shower.
I woke up around 1pm. I saw Mark before he left for work.
I saw the coolest SPOILER picturs of one of the final 3 Whoniverse specials for the 10th Doctor and I'm so very glad that I did!!! The upcoming Easter Special ("Planet of the Dead") looks deadly lame to me (and the monsters in it are really stupid looking), so I have extremely low expectations for that one, so I've not been feeling the Doctor Who love of late... Only today I saw... Well...if you don't want to know you need to back the fuck out of here now, but I'd like to point out that these pictures didn't ruin the story for me, but made me desperate to see it!!!! :-0)
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SpoilersOk. So the pictures I saw relate to one of the final 3 Doctor Who specials featuring the 10th Doctor. Here's what we already know about these specials: The first of these final 3 specials will air on Christmas day, and the final 2 will most likely air around New Years. The final 3 specials are said to have a story arc, with the final 2 forming a 2-part story - and it is known that this final story will explain why the 10th Doctor must regenerate into the 11th Doctor (played by Matt Smith) who will star in the 2010 series of Doctor Who. Ok? Everybody got that?
Ok. Here's the new stuff. The pictures were of the 10th Doctor in a modern type bookstore at a book signing. There's a big poster of the book in question, and the book has a set of fob watches on the cover; fob watches were important story elements in 'Human Nature' / 'The Family of Blood' & 'Utopia'.
The name of the book is 'A Journal of Impossible Things'! This was the name of the Doctor's storybook he'd written when he was John Smith in the 'Human Nature' / 'The Family of Blood' 2-parter (AKA the episodes that made me LOVE the 10th Doctor) - the book in those episodes referenced many other Doctor Who stories, characters & things such as the TARDIS, 'The Girl in the Fireplace', a sonic screwdriver, K-9, Rose Tyler, Autons, Clockwork Droids, Cybermen, Daleks, the Moxx of Balhoon, a Slitheen, the Chula gas-masked Zombie, + the 1st, 5th, 6th, 7th & 8th Doctors (and that's not all).
Also of note in these new special pix is the name of the author: Verity Newman. In "Human Nature" the 10th Doctor (as John Smith) tells Joan Redfern that his parents names were Sydney & Verity, which was a nod to Sydney Newman (credited as the primary creator of Doctor Who) & Verity Lambert (the show's first producer).
Oh, and one more thing. The author at the modern day book store is played by Jessica Hynes...who played Joan Redfern in 'Human Nature' / 'The Family of Blood'!!!!!! So yeah, I'm intrigued.
You know, I'll just include 2 of those pictures here:
posted by Bald Jason at 02:49 PM
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Wednesday, March 25, 2009
So I was having a fairly relaxing evening, chatting with Chris and reading stuff on wikipedia. And then, out of the blue, my phone died. It's gone all crazy. Mark's looking at it, but I fear it's gone. I was planning on doing some stuff tonight, but now I'm not in the mood. Blah.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:55 AM
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I slept a good long time. I woke up feeling kind of blah. Mark told me he thought he was getting some kind of bug; I hope he was wrong. And I hope that if he was right, that I didn't catch it. Been up since 3pm.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:50 PM
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I feel weird not having a phone.
posted by Bald Jason at 10:41 PM
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Thursday, March 26, 2009
I have the ballad of Tam Lin stuck in my head. It's making me want to go back and read all the fantasy books I loved when I was in middle school. Books by Charles DeLint. And the Perilous Gard. And Shadow Castle. I've recently read most of the Narnia books, so I'm kind of over reading those, but still...things are stirring. I'm glad I'm reading the Robotech books again.
posted by Bald Jason at 12:30 AM
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I finished the first Robotech book. Just 20 more to go. lol.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:21 AM
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I miss Mollie.
posted by Bald Jason at 04:14 AM
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I had a horrible, horrible time getting to sleep this morning. It just wasn't happening. I started the 2nd Robotech book. I daydreamed. I played games. I read news. But nothing really seemed to amuse me either. It was not fun.
I eventually got to sleep around 7am, if not a little later. I woke up at around 12:30 I think, with terrible stomach cramps. Mark was in the shower. And I was exhausted. I just wanted to get back to sleep so the pain would stop. I was then woken up when Mark came into my room. I pretended to be asleep so he would leave me alone, which he did, and I fell asleep again. Then he came back into my room and woke me up again (this time on purpose), telling me I had a voicemail on my fricking phone (like it wouldn't be there when I woke up) and wanting to fill out a card to send to my Uncle Mike, who's been under the weather. Now I understand that last one (I'm the one who bought the card to begin with) but there I was, suffering because he kept waking me up - it was so annoying. I told him I wanted to sleep...he eventually left me alone. It took me about an hour to get back to sleep. Today had sucked so far.
I woke up around 4:30pm, feeling so much better! ;-0) This is good. My stomach cramps are gone and I feel well rested.
The voicemail that was on my phone (which took me a long while to get as my phone is still fucked up beyond the telling of it) was a reminder of my eye doctor appointment tomorrow, which I'm so not excited about as I know I'll most likely be asleep during it. Then I checked my e-mail, and I'd gotten one from DJ saying this Saturday works for AVP, only I hadn't heard from him in so long that I figured it wasn't and I let Mark rope me into this day with his family (which is also an all day thing, meaning I won't be getting any sleep) - so I can't play with my seldom seen friends anyways. Argh. My weekend is looking less and less fun. Maybe it will go better. But I'm super nervous about it now.
posted by Bald Jason at 05:04 PM
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I'm sitting here chatting with Sean on his 24th birthday. We're talking about smoking pot. And I keep picturing all the things we'd do if he was here in Ann Arbor. I'd have taken him to the Michigan Theater to see the gay shorts that were playing tonight. Then I'd have taken for a walk across campus and we'd eat at Pizza House like we used to do back in 2002. The Radiohead that I'm listening to only makes it that much more haunting.
I tell Sean what I'm thinking about but I think this is just depressing him more on his birthday which most people seem to have forgotten. He misses the city he says, and I don't blame him. I tell him that the city misses him too, and he says that maybe sometimes it does. I think it does. Cities need their haunted young men; it's part of their magic.
Radiohead has run it's course and switches off "There There (The Boney King of Nowhere)" to click on The Cure's "The Twilight Garden". Nice.
I need to shave. My beard makes me look slightly butch, in a white trash kind of way. I hook Sean up with my webcam and he compares me to Bon Iver; a lumberjack singer that I google so I can have some understanding of what has just been said.
While this goes on a 50yo man I don't know opens a chat window with me on gay.com and tells me to suck his 9.5 incher. "WTF?" - he doesn't respond and I put him on ignore. Why can't people just talk on there?
I make a crack about Dutch people...sort of. And now a song about Amsterdam is stuck in my head. I remember the record; the hard plastic. I remember the player; the odd rubber circles. And the song: "Wouldn't you? Wouldn't you like to wear a wooden shoe like they do in Amsterdam?". My brain scares me sometimes.
The conversation is dying down; at least on my end. I'm tired and I crave a shower. It's hot in my room and I'm sweaty. It's fun chatting with Sean though. 24 years old today. It's dying on his end too. He says goodnight as he has to be up early tomorrow to babysit. He makes plans to chat with me tomorrow night though.
The Cure fades out:
"No one will ever take your place."
And then Radiohead makes a return appearance:
"Just cause you feel it doesn't mean its there."
posted by Bald Jason at 10:33 PM
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Friday, March 27, 2009
Mark's being a dick. I already don't want to go to the eye doctor tomorrow, and I'm already leaning towards not wanting to go with him on his family trip on Saturday, but I tried to make peace with him and the idea of it by asking to see the website he's working on - and instead of meeting me half and offering something constructive he's being a dick.
I've had such a wretched day. And I was telling how much it sucks not having a phone and he asked me why I didn't get up before he went to work on Thursday so we could go to get the phone fixed then. First of all, I wasn't able to get to sleep until very late in the morning. Secondly, when I did wake up I was sick. I couldn't have gone yesterday morning, and Mark never suggested this before - so what was the point of bringing it up now when that can't be changed? Why couldn't he have just sympathised with me and then reassured me that we can probably get it fixed on Sunday?
My head hurts so fucking bad.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:19 AM
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I woked on my LGBT inclusive Star Trek page last night. I layed down for bed around 5am. I got to sleep around 7am. It was so warm in my room, and I was acidy. I had good dreams though, until Mark woke me up at 10am. He's taking a shower right now. I wish I had time to shave. And my eyes hurt and are watery.
posted by Bald Jason at 10:26 AM
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The eye doctor appointment went well, except that I hurt my neck/back when they shot air into my eye and I tensed up. Ugh. I'm in a lot of pain for something really stupid. But I found out that my perscription from my sunglassed until now hasn't changed - and it's been like 5 years. When I got my first pair of glasses my eyes got a bit worse (not by much, but still) by the time I got my sunglasses, so I just assumed my eyes would continue to get worse. Not so, apparently. I got a nice new pair of glasses (which will be ready in a week) and they bent my old ones back in to shape - so now I have 3 pairs. And Mark got some reading glasses ;-0)
We went to the Sprint store and replaced my phone. They couldn't get the old numbers transferred because my phone was so fucked up. The new phone is nice. It's purple, has a keypad and a camera. And it's loud, which I like. I'm not comfortable usuing it yet, but it always takes me awhile.
I dropped Mark off at work. I didn't get grocery money out as I didn't want to overdraw the account, but I still went to Kroger to pick up some stuff I've been meaning to get all week. I used my credit card / bank card, which I hate using as I have so little money in there. At least when I get my tax return that will help a little.
I came home and wrote this. My back hurts way more than it has any right to. Butt that's how it goes. It's very easy for me to hurt my back, and it generally happens when I least expect it. Ugh.
posted by Bald Jason at 02:41 PM
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I took a 3 hour nap, which really did me some good. My back still hurts like hell. I had a dream about Mark & I traveling and being pulled over by the police...and we were on the run. We ended up at the home of my Great Aunt Laura, who in the dream had died, and I found out that their children were serial killers. The house was terrifying. But Mark & I wandered out into their vast yard and there was a sort of movie magic moment where I was seeing through time, and I could see all the people that had come here and been murdered, as they were when they were alive, glowing out on the lawn... And they didn't interact with one another but sort of ran across one another, as I was seeing many times all taking place in the same place. I remember putting my hand over my mouth and saying 'Oh my god." over and over again, and I realized I was the only one seeing this...and I woke up.
I had a snack, and read some news.
I just remembered, right before my cell died, I had a text message from someone asking me if I was going to Necto tonight. I didn't get to see who it was from. I was planning on going tonight, but now that my back is fucked up I'm not sure it's a good idea. But I might go. I never like to decide these things until the last minute. I know I've been invited by a few people, and Michael said something about being there. I don't know.
Here's the trailer for BSG moive, The Plan, which should air this fall, probably around November:
posted by Bald Jason at 07:13 PM
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Saturday, March 28, 2009
I shaved and showered and scrubbed before picking Mark up from work, on time. We went to Little Caesars for Crazy Bread, which was fantastic. I ate mine on the way home. I went to Necto; had a lot of fun. I saw Josh (who I last saw when I met him on Halloween), his nugget, my friends Leon and Doug, James & Garret & James's boyfriend, Anthony, Ruth, Andy, Becky & Scott & Keevan. I met Justin, who's 19 and from Milan (his family actually owns some of the buildings in the village where I grew up, and he used to work in the now defunct Campfire eatery). There were probably more that I saw and knew and met that I can't think of at the moment. I walked Josh to his car and he told me that the night we met, Corey kept cockblocking him when it came to me, which I didn't even realize at the time. Josh is moving to Chicago in 2 months and wants to hang out sometime before then. In the parking structure I complimented some women on their shoes; they held the elevator for me and invited me out with them, but I need to get some laundry done - and hopefully get some sleep too.
Anyways - the night was fun. Yay.
posted by Bald Jason at 02:10 AM
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I traded texts and messages with Josh (from Necto) and later with Brandon (a boy I know from online that lives in Ann Arbor). It was all fun. I started my laundry; I'll get the clothes I need for today in the dryer and then try to sleep.
I love Rachel Maddow. I loved watching her during the election, and I love her even more now. I watch her every day online. She makes politics fun, and I trust her. She's one of us. ;-0)
posted by Bald Jason at 05:10 AM
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Ooh. I'm hearing more rumblings of Donna possibly appearing in one of the final Doctor Who specials this December! I don't know how that would work, or even if we can trust this will happen. But it would be like Russell T Davies to pull out all the stops for these specials. I mean, not only is it the end of the 10th Doctor; it's also the end for Russell as well, plus other key crew members. That would be awesome. But even if Donna & Rose & Martha & the Master don't appear - we do know that people do come back and that the 10th Doctor will regenerate. We just don't know the specifics. At least there will be some exciting tv come December.
I'm tired. I'm gonna go throw my clothes in the dryer, and head to bed.
posted by Bald Jason at 06:01 AM
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Mark's mad at me. I woke up feeling less than fun. I took some Vitamin C & Echinacea, which is now coming back up. I told Mark that I couldn't be ready in 10 minutes, so he cancelled his trip all together - to see his Mom, brother, sister-in-law & nephews; his mom lives in Toledo, but the rest live a lot further away and are in town for a visit. It's sad because I know his nephew Nick, who's soooooo so cute, likes to see his Uncle Mark, and I know Mark likes to see him. I hate that he cancelled his trip. I hate that he's putting this on me, like it's my fault he's not going. I couldn't be ready in 10 minutes even if I wasn't feeling crappy. My throat is making scary noises.
I had odd dreams. Burnt out cities. Homeless rebels. A plan to save the world.
I woke up feeling well rested, in spite of my throat being on fire, and my back still aching. Mark was sweet. Told me that he was sorry for waking me (he was naked, using the vacume cleaner to sweep up his hair, and his butt looked really cute). He brought me the Vitamin C & Echinacea, and brought my clothes up from the dryer. When I told him I thought I might be sick and that a lot of people were sick at the bar (Leon was getting over a tonsil infection, and Ruth had a head/chest cold) and that I wasn't sure I wanted to be around the kids today and risk getting them sick he said that kids are usually sick because they don't wash their hands and stuff. lol. I think he knew I was leaning towards not going and was desperate for me to go, which is sweet, and cute, but in the end it's kind of disturbing too. He should be able to go to these things by himself, and see everyone and be happy, and respect that I don't feel well, and be disappointed that I couldn't make it - without being upset with me. It scares me a little bit. Like if something were to ever happen to me, he'd never go see his family again. The thing is, he's not always like that. He often does go see his family without me. I guess I understand. Sometimes I want him to places with me too. I just don't think it's healthy.
The pills are coming up slightly less now. I'm going to take a shower. I didn't shower after the bar last night and I probably smell like smoke. Maybe a shower will help me feel better?
posted by Bald Jason at 01:13 PM
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The shower helped; I puked a lot. I have 'The Blower's Daughter' stuck in my head, so I just burnt that to a mixed cd. I got dressed. I decided I was going to visit Mark's family, with or without him. Pretty sure I don't have a cold; hopefully I don't have a cold. Mark is coming with me; he says I'm wacky. I wish he could have been supportive of me earlier.
posted by Bald Jason at 01:53 PM
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Sunday, March 29, 2009
I drove us to Toledo where we had a fun visit with Mark's mother (Maria), his brother (Marcus), his sister-in-law (Julie), & his nephews (Nick & Ethan). A fun time was had by all. After that we came home. I took some prilosec; took a shower. I had a snack. We stopped to get me some food on the way to his step-sister Terry's house. There we met her boyfriend/husband(?) Chris, Chris's daughter (Sam), and Chris's dog (Toby), and Terry's nearly 2 year old grand-daughter McKayla (who loved me). Euchre and conversation - all of it good. But I was so beyond exhausted. We stopped at Meijer on the way home.
I'm tired. My back is killing me. I'm hungry.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:09 AM
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Monday, March 30, 2009
I did almost nothing on Sunday. I read. I chatted.
17 years ago, on that Sunday, I went to church wearing leather pants and a white silk shirt.
I was staying in a hospital at the time and had a pass to spend the day with my family.
The previous night I'd seen Basic Instinct in theaters with my sister and her boyfriend Jerry. I also bought a disc man and a Metallica cd. The day before that... Well, I could go on.
I didn't spend all weekend weeping, or screwing my memories away. So...that's progress.
posted by Bald Jason at 03:00 AM
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Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday was odd. I couldn't sleep. When I felt that I could sleep, I couldn't because I needed to stay up to wake Mark up for work (as he refused to set his alarm clock). Then after he left I found it hard to get to sleep again. I went to sleep around 4pm and woke up at 6pm. I stayed up for 2 hours then went back to bed and woke up at 2:30am. I thought it was around 10pm the previous night and was trying to figure out what I should wear to the bar, only to find out the bar was already closed. lol.
Shortly after that I jumped on the Trek boards which was fun. I'm really enjoying the reading of the Robotech books, and I found another Robotech book fan online, which is rare. Later I read that Andy Hallett, who played Lorne on Angel had passed away at 33. I went to write this in my blog but it wasn't working. Later I found that the internet was working, but not my blog so I woke Mark so he could fix the emergency. Around this time, this guy Michael that I have a date set up with for Saturday texted me. And I got a headache. I texted him back, and later we spoke on the phone for a few hours I think. It was nice. It was easy to talk to him. He says he'd like to see me today, but I told him it depended on when I slept and if I was able to get rid of my headache.
I just ate and took my meds. They're starting to work. Hopefully the headache goes and I can get some sleep later. That would be nice.
It's sad that Andy died. 33 years old. I always assumed he was older than me for some reason. He was born August 4, 1975; almost a year younger than me (my birthday is the 12th). He died on Sunday, March 29. You can read about him here.
posted by Bald Jason at 08:57 AM
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