Sunday, June 5, 2011

I found I could edit avi format as well and I made a new
extended cut of "A Disquiet Follows My Soul"; this one
combines the extended DVD cut with a scene edited out of
"The Face of the Enemy" webisodes...and it works beautifully.
This so cool. When I'm finished, I'll have the most complete
BSG files available to me; I'll have the whole story at last. Of
course there's a new pilot for a new series coming soon
("Blood & Chrome") and I look forward to that as well.

I'm downloading the mid-season finale of Doctor Who, "A
Good Man Goes to War".

I slept a bit. I feel super spacey.

   posted by Bald Jason at 01:44 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Monday, June 6, 2011

Sunday was odd. I slept a lot. I read a little. I watched the
mid-season finale of Doctor Who ("A Good Man Goes To
War") twice. I worked on some stuff. My stomach seemed
to calm down quite a bit more than it has been doing
lately...perhaps because my intake of prilosec has
increaded to it's former dose thanks to help from Mark.

I haven't finished any more extended BSG cuts. The
installments I have finished so far are:

001 Caprica 1x01 Pilot
043 BSG 2x10 Pegasus
088 BSG 4x12 A Disquiet Follows My Soul
095 BSG 4x18 Islanded in a Stream of Stars

Not much really. Especially since the "Pegaus" & "Islanded
in a Stream of Stars" are just the extended cuts from the
DVDs with no added footage (because there isn't any) and
that I may redo "A Disquiet Follows My Soul" as Mark
swears I can get even more quality out of it.

I'm doing laundry. I cleaned my room. I'm doing the
dishes. I emptied the trash. I scrubbed the kitchen.

I'm playing Farmtown again. It's not that it's productive,
cause it's not...but I've noticed that it relaxes me...and
anything that relaxes me right now is a very, very good
thing.

About Doctor Who...the mid-series finale, which is part IV
of V (or so it seems) felt very much like an RTD
story...which is cool. It featured lots of returning
characters and situations...which was fun, and though
some of the returning characters were from episodes I
don't like ("Victory of the Daleks" / "The Curse of the Black
Spot")...that kind of forces me to like those crappy
episodes a bit more. There were also payoffs for those
paying attention in the horrible Weeping Angel episodes of
last season so that helps with those episodes as well. It
was revealed who River Song is, sort of, and some other
stuff was explained and there were twists - however I'd
guessed all of that in advance - which left me wondering
why I enjoyed the episode so much...and then I looked at
the new characters. Madame Vastra / Jenny / Strax / &
Lorna Bucket were all fantastic new characters who I'd
LOVE to see more of. The episode was VERY LGBT
inclusive with Vastra / Jenny & Fat One / Thin One - I
know it might seem weird but I just LOVE when they have
LGBT characters in SciFi / Fantasy shows now because
they're so rare that they feel very fresh...any time there's
the slightest gay reference it brings me joy. Again, the
returning characters / aliens (11, Amy, Rory, River, Danny
Boy, Dorium, Madame Kovarian, Captain Avery & Toby, the
Silurians, the Judoon, the Sontarans, the Cybermen, the
Military Clerics & the Headless Monks) were also
welcomed. Fun.

The only thing I didn't love about the finale...and this is
something that's been building since last season - where
are the answers? So many questions now and so few
answers. It's got me a bit worried because I don't want
Doctor Who to turn into LOST or X-Files where you're all
but promised answers that are never given to you. Ugh.
Still, for now, I'm quite enjoying the episodes of Doctor
Who we've gotten this year. Here's how I'd rate them:

01 Space [Part I] ****
02 Time [Part II] ****

Fun mini-episodes that would rate 5 stars if they were
more important than they are. But still, great fun. It's not
clear where these mini-episodes fit in with the rest but I'll
figure that out later I'm sure.

03 Prequel 01 [Part I] ****
04 The Impossible Astronaut [Part II} *****
05 Day of the Moon [Part III] *****

A fantastic 3 part story which raises lots of still to be
answered questions, yet is packed with AWESOME. If the
questions are answered well these episodes will remain
classics. If they are answered poorly then that might drag
these episodes down a bit.

06 Prequel 02 [Part I] ****
07 The Curse of the Black Spot [Part II] **

I have problems with 'Curse'. It's a good story at heart but
it feels rushed and some of the logic seems faulty...and
then there's a really big plot hole that's very clearly a
horrible flub in continuity that it's just really annoying.

08 The Doctor's Wife ****

A great stand alone episode. I'd have given it 5 stars...yet
it just doesn't quite do it for me. I don't know...it feels like
something's missing here but maybe I'll enjoy it more the
2nd time around?

09 The Rebel Flesh [Part I] ***
10 The Almost People [Part II] ****
11 Prequel 03 [Part III] ****
12 A Good Man Goes To War [Part IV] *****

I may enjoy "The Rebel Flesh" / "The Almost People" more
the 2nd time around; I'm not sure. It felt like we were
(again) getting bits of story with a lot held back to be
explained later, which again makes these stories feel
incomplete and like I don't know how to feel about them
until all the answers are given.

The "Prequel" mini and the Mid-Season Finale were better.
I enjoyed all the continuity in the Preqeul installment and
then "A Good Man Goes To War" was enjoyable for all the
reasons I've already listed in my random review. lol.

Anyways. More to do.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:28 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Tuesday, June 7, 2011

I chatted for a bit last night. I was frustrated though and
cranky. I eventually took a nap. I woke up wanting to work
on my BSG project and went over several deleted scenes.
I'm working on Caprica at the moment and hope to finish
an episode or two, but it's complicated by unfinished
special effects (which I may or may not be able to edit so
that they can be reinserted). Mark offered that I might just
put in the unfinished sequences as people have
imaginations and they'll get it...and he has a point...I may
even end up doing a cut like that, I just think if I can find a
better way that I should.

Ooh. They've announced the titles of the final 3 The Sarah
Jane Adventures stories:

5x01 Sky, Part I
5x02 Sky, Part II
by Phil Ford

5x03 The Curse of Clyde Langer, Part I
5x04 The Curse of Clyde Langer, Part II
by Gareth Roberts

&

5x05 The Man Who Wasn't There, Part I
5x06 The Man Who Wasn't There, Part II
by Phil Ford

It's been said that these would have originally been stories
1, 2 & 6 (6 being the season finale) and that Luke will be
appearing the final story. Perhaps the final story will have
a bit of closure? Or perhaps they may add a voice over or
something to give it more of an ending sort of a feel? I
hope so.

It's apparently also been said that these stories will air in
October? So we have Torchwood (both Miracle Day & Web
of Lies) from July - September, then Doctor Who from
September - October or November. And Sarah Jane in
October / November. The Doctor Who Christmas Special in
December. I suspect we'll be getting at least 1 more mini-
episode of Who as well.

As for the writers of these final Sarah Jane stories, Phil
Ford has written many Sarah Jane episodes in the past,
including several of my favorites and none of my least
favorites. He also wrote the animated Who story
Dreamland, which he worked into 2 stories of Sarah Jane
("Prisoner of the Judoon" & "The Vault of Secrets") and he
co-wrote the best of the final 10th Doctor Specials: "The
Waters of Mars". He also wrote the amazingly fun
"Something Borrowed" episode of Torchwood. Gareth
Roberts has also written many Sarah Jane stories including
all the appearances of my favorite villain, the Trickster,
along with some really good Who episodes, including
"Attack of the Graske", "The Shakespeare Code", "The
Unicorn and the Wasp", "The Lodger" & the upcoming 12th
episode of Season 6, which has yet to reveal it's title but is
something of a sequel to "The Lodger"; he also cowrote
the ok 10th Doctor Special "Planet of the Dead". I think
we're in good hands. I just hope that none of the stories
feature the Slitheen, as they've been played to death on
that series.

I made Mark breakfast and got him up for work. He has to
be in early today as he's leaving early to spend time with
his girlfriend. I'm sending along a peace offering; a
thumbdrive filled with Doctor Whoniverse episodes, after
she expressed interest in seeing more Who.

Mark's getting out of the shower. I'm going to have a
shake and some pain killer (my neck and back and head
started hurting about an hour ago).

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:41 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

So Monday was pretty horrible. I keep drifting in and out
of depression. There are moments when I think everything
is ok...and then I come crashing down again. I pick myself
up...and then...I don't know.

It doesn't help that everytime I make plans lately I have to
cancel them because Mark has plans with Gen. It's
seriously happened like 5 times now or something.
Tonight it was nearly comical. He asked me if I knew
where 'Lilo & Stich' was, and the reason that it wasn't on
the shelf where it usually is, was that I'd taken it to my
room earlier when I found out he was going to see Gen
tomorrow - something to watch while remember the good
Jason / Mark days - only he had made plans to watch that
EXACT movie with her. Ugh. I nearly lost it. I really nearly
lost it. This is after that horrible weekend where she
ruined the whole thing, and then me cancelling my plans
on Sunday so that Mark could see her, and me cancelling
my plans this Friday because he's going to see her, and I
later told him that the next time I have plans I get to have
my plans because it shouldn't be this one sided. I'll
probably never watch 'Lilo & Stitch' ever again as it is. :*(

Anyways, Mark is grumpy too. And tired. And we keep
bitching and then hugging it out. I just wish there was a
way I could deal...only all the things I do to deal with stuff
seems impossible to me right now. I honestly feel
hopeless a lot of the time. And I don't know what to do to
stop feeling hopeless.

I DID however figure out some stuff related to my
Complete BSG project so I should be able to work on some
Caprica in the next few days. Also, Mark was nice enough
to take the time to convert some Doctor Who FLV files for
me so I have them as AVIs now.

I feel tired and stressed and I don't like it. I'd go to Necto
but I feel like staying in and crying. Like...I don't want to
deal with people. Mark asked me the other day if I'd feel
better if I had a boyfriend but I don't think I would...I
honestly don't think I could handle one at the moment...I
get horny of course, but I don't know or like anyone
enough to have sex with them. Well, that's not true...there
are a couple guys that I know and like well enough...I'm
just not certain it's a good idea. We'll see.

   posted by Bald Jason at 12:56 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Yesterday I worked on a side project for much of the day,
which went nowhere...and I was dogged by a horrible
headache. I did however finish my rewatch of the 12
episodes of Who that we've gotten this year, which I quite
enjoyed. I put the first season of Whon on a thumbdrive
for Gen as a peace offering and wished Mark well on his
trip; he said he'd be back that night or that he'd call if he
decided to crash there. He never called and he's still not
home.

I chatted with a guy named Angelo, that I had met online a
few years ago when I was dating Michael. He admitted that
when he saw I had a boyfriend before he was jealous and
that now that I was single he was interested. We talked for
a few hours. It was nice. He's 33 I think. He's tall. And he
was fun to talk to. We might go out Friday night.

I also spoke to Travis for awhile. He finished BSG, though
he's yet to see the webisodes or The Plan. He loved the
finale of the show for the same reasons I did and he's
anxious to rewatch it, just as I told him he would be...but
he's waiting for my extended cuts.

After I got off the phone with Travis I worked on the next
installment of Caprica (1x02 "Rebirth") which I got a lot
done on, though what's left is going to take a lot of effort.
I was able to incorporate many deleted scenes...including
one that I creatively edited so that the incomplete special
effects never appear on screen. I want to try somethiung
similar with another scene which will be much more
complicated as it involves laying down the audio of the
scene over footage I'll have to link together to make it
appear something is happening...which it's not. lol.
So...very tricky. I saved my work and I'll get back to it later
probably.

I read some more Robotech. It's like catching up with old
friends.

Doctor Who has been renewed for next season with 14
episodes and Matt Smith back as the 11th Doctor. No
word on Amy or Rory, which doesn't surprise me as I
suspect they'll be leaving the series as the main
companions after the current season, though I also
suspect they will be recurring guest stars.

I'm sleepy.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:22 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

Mark got home around 8am, and apologised for not calling.
He left for work and I then managed to sleep for almost 8
hours, which hasn't happened in awhile. I had a scary
nightmare of boyfriend figures molesting a child (Jamie) and
this leading to me trying to leave...and then bloodletting. It
was intense.

I joined Mark at his lockpicking meeting and got to talk to
people about BSG / Caprica / Star Trek / Firefly & Doctor
Who. Lots of fun for me. Mark & I went to Little Caesars and I
ate just the right amount I think so that I won't be sick. We'll
see. My headache is back AGAIN. It's been awhile since I had
such a rough cluster migrain. I'm really NOT enjoying it.

I've not worked on Caprica today. I'll probably work on it a bit
tonight. The squence I'm working on is just very complicated
and I'm not sure I have the energy to deal with it at the
moment.

   posted by Bald Jason at 11:21 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Thursday, June 9, 2011

I chatted a bit. I traded some messages with friend. I got the
latest Nurse Jackie, though I've not watched it yet. I still need
to get the latest episodes of "Game of Thrones", "The Killing",
"Graham Norton" & "United States of Tara". I should get "Teen
Wolf" as well and check that out. In what has become a rare
treat, I've got the new Chelsea Lately. I think I might have a
snack and watch that...then I'll probably read a bit and go to
sleep.

   posted by Bald Jason at 03:31 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I ended up not going to sleep after the last entry. I
watched Nurse Jackie, Chelsea Lately & Caprica. And then I
finished my edit of episode 2 of Caprica, which turned out
beautifully. I got Mark up for work; he helped me with my
conversion of the file and then he left and I slept for 8
wonderful hours.

Waking, I had a shake as Mark headed out to a friend's.
Then his girlfriend, who I'm trying to mend fences with,
yet get ill just thinking of her, texted me. I'd asked her not
to. That she couldn't keep herself from contacting me
doesn't bode well in my opinion. It was a polite text that
thanked me for my recent gift of Season 27 of the
Whoniverse...and then that she's falling for Mark and she
hopes we can be friends. I would like us to be friends
too...yet I need some time to distance some stuff, which is
why I asked her not to contact me...only she did. This
raises a red flag. Also, the fact that she's falling for Mark,
despite the fact that she broke up with him via text last
week...is just weird. It's not weird that she's falling for
Mark because he's AWESOME on many, many levels...but
it's weird that she says she's falling for him so soon after
breaking up with him simply because he didn't call her
back right away, when she knew he was walking
downtown and had told her he'd call back when he got
home. I'm not sure if I should respond. I'm not sure how I
feel about the text. It just seems like something she could
have relayed through Mark without doing something that I
asked her not to do. It's just...lately, no matter what I ask
or plan, I don't get what I'm wanting because of
her...which makes it difficult to like her...especially since I
can't express my being upset to her because then she
freaks out. It's frustrating. Add to that, that we're both
attention whores and there's only 1 Mark and I've been
trying to limit my contact with him when he's with her so
that she can have her time with him...yet she doesn't seem
to extend the same courtesy to me. I just feel like I'm
getting the short end of the stick here and it sucks. And
now I'm puking again, when I haven't in 24 hours. Nice.
Thanks for that.

I have a doctor's appointment a week from tomorrow at
which I'm going to ask that I be allowed to have the
surgery that sometimes helps people with my condition. I
don't want back on the meds because even though they
helped me, they're very dangerous and they take away all
my limited energy - plus I take far too much medication as
it is. Perhaps the surgery will help? I won't know until I try
and it seems like my best option now...but I'm terrified.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:00 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Friday, June 10, 2011

After the last entry I showered and shaved and had a
conversation about the Watchmen film on Facebook. Then I
dressed and went for a walk where I ended up the Aut Bar. I
wasn't planning on staying but I ran into Jeff and then Tom,
and then a kid named Jay who said that we'd met about 5
years ago, though I didn't quite remember him. Good night
with Tom. I texted Mark so when he got home he'd know
where I am and a short time later he wandered in as well,
having walked from home also. Mark had a black russian and
there was conversation and laughter. Eventually we headed
home and it had cooled down a lot; my arms and head were
cold; about 3 quarters of the way home Mark gave me his
long sleeved shirt to wear. I had cinnimon rolls when we got
home...and I killed this monster sized ant that crawled out
from under our fridge. It makes me want to move that sucker
and clean everything! After eating I actually fell asleep and I
just woke up.

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:20 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I worked on an extended cut of "Someone to Watch Over
Me" (a fantastic episode of BSG) as I had all the bits on my
computer already. Everything was going great...until all
the bits were edited in and saved and then it went all
wonky. I wish Mark & I could figure out exactly what the
problem is cause it's driving me crazy.

I dreamt about Kara Thrace before being woken up by a
call from Mark. It was raining and he wanted to be picked
up. I moved slow...I'd taken a Fioricet earlier for a
headache and it stays in my system for awhile, plus my
headache was back as well. Ugh. I got dressed. I rubbed in
some sunblock, which I'm nearly out of, about to put my
shoes on when Mark called back to say he could now take
the bus. Part of me was mad because I'd just been woken
from great dream, with a headache, and just wasted my
sunblock...but part of me was grateful too because my
head felt like it was going to explode and I probably
shouldn't be driving. This means I won't be driving him to
Gen's place either and that I won't get to go out tonight. I
had a tentative date set for tonight but I've not heard back
from him so that might mean that his other plans came
through (he was supposed to go to Cedar Point with some
coworkers tomorrow but when I spoke to him he'd said
those plans were looking unlikley. Anyways...I really don't
care about any of that. I just want my headache to go
away. :(

   posted by Bald Jason at 04:48 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

Mark's mad at me. He came home and we hugged and he
said he felt worn down. He had told me that he'd be
coming home Saturday or Sunday which I was fine with. I
had just taken a prilosec though and realized that I only
had 1 left which I'll have to take around 5am, and then I'll
need my script filled by 5pm, so I told him I needed him
back tomorrow; I didn't think this would be a problem as
he already said that he might be back tomorrow, and
because I wasn't asking him to cancel his plans the way
I've had to cancel mine at almost every instance of late - I
was just asking to curtail them a bit - which he'd already
said was a possibility. He was pissed. He'd told me this
morning that if I needed anything from the store that I
should go while he was at work; I did consider going but
realized not only did I have enough groceries to last me
until Sunday, my foodstamps wouldn't be renewed until
then. I was also very tired and getting ready for bed - it
would be like me telling him he need to go to the store if
he needed anything for the next couple of days while he
was getting ready for bed - but because I'm sleeing in the
daylight hours that's somehow not as important. His
answer was that there's a bus that goes to the drug store.
He knows that I don't take the bus because of my
stomach. And once again I feel victimized by my
condition. If I didn't have the hope of my doctor's
appointment on Friday and the possible help of that
surgery I'd be so suicidal at this point. I've thrown up
nearly every day for 10 almost 10 years. I do have good
days though, so let's just say I've thrown up every day for
9 years. It's not fun. It's exhausting. It's gross. And it has
curtailed so much of my life at this point that it's like I'm
barely living.

This is very upsetting. I've cancelled my plans again and
again for him of late. And today, he woke me up with a
phone call to see if I could pick him up despite me not
getting enough sleep, being drugged, and having a
migraine and I said I'd do it without bitching at all. I feel
like I've given up a lot to allow him to have his budding
relationship, but when I need a favor I'm treated like it's
some sort of outragious demand...and I'm left thinking
why are his plans more important than mine? Even when I
was in a relationship, and he needed the car to see family
or friends, his needs always came before mine and I just
assumed that at some point when I needed something the
favor would be returned. I guess I was wrong.

It just hit me that I should have asked if we could go fill
my perscription before he left...then he might have been
late but he could have stayed until Sunday without me
being deprived of my medication. Ugh. Damned drugs.
Mark didn't think of it either though so I guess we're both
pretty stupid.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:33 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

On a cheery note, my headache is gone again and this music
from BSG is really beautiful. I need to stop thinking of the
negative or I'm gonna be sick. I'll muddle through somehow.
I just have to stay positive, which is getting harder and
harder. I need pull myself out of this somehow or I'm not
going to survive.

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:16 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I just realized we have these generic prilosec pills I can take.
They generally don't work as well for me, but I could take
those in the morning, and then my last prilosec at night and
it could probably tide me over until Mark gets back on
Sunday. I texted him the news...though I don't think he was
planning on coming back for me anyways - but didn't want
to risk him coming back on Saturday and being pissed that I
took him at his word when he told me to take the bus. Again,
it makes me sad to think that he wouldn't do this for me
when he said that he might be back on Saturday and
considering all the sacrifices I've made for him in just the last
few weeks, but I'm going to try to just... Ugh. I'm crying. This
putting on a happy face isn't as easy as it sounds. I was fine
just 20 minutes ago. Part of me wants to go back to bed and
hide. The other part wants to read or chat or do something.
My tentative date has been cancelled, which is fine with me
as I don't feel up for it now anyways, but I may get to see him
tomorrow...or next week. We'll see.

   posted by Bald Jason at 08:29 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

   Saturday, June 11, 2011

I ate after the last entry, managing to keep it all down, and
then slept for a few hours, waking around 12:30am. I chatted
for a bit. I worked on my farmtown, adding about 100 trees. I
then decided to give that last BSG episode another go, just to
see if I could maybe get it to work...and I did!!! :) The
complete version of "Someone to Watch Over Me" runs just a
little over 3 minutes longer than the aired version (with 6
scenes restored) and makes a fantastic episode just that
much better. I tried the new conversation process that Mark
showed me but I messed it up somehow so I'll just keep the
completed original on ice until Mark can help me with the
conversation process. I now have basically 6 completed
installments out of 96 (including an installment that hasn't
been released yet - which may or may not lead to another tv
series). What to edit next? I should be working on
Caprica...yet I'd love to finish BSG 4.5 as though episodes are
so much fun. Hmmm.

   posted by Bald Jason at 05:22 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I edited another BSG episode: "Sometimes A Great Notion".
The episode was a favorite of mine when it aired. The new
version runs about 5 minutes longer and includes another
sequence featuring Kara & Leoben searching for her Viper;
Baltar giving a sermon featuring an encounter with Caprica
Six and words that foreshadow Roslin reaching Earth. And a
scene of Tigh remembering Ellen...and him standing on the
beach with Caprica Six. It makes sense that Tigh would
remember Ellen at the beach; in "No Exit" Sam remembers
going to the beach because Ellen loved the water. Neat.
Again, I'll have to wait for Mark to convert these, but I think
it's probably safe to scratch another one off the list. :)

   posted by Bald Jason at 07:30 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I finished editing another BSG episode: "Downloaded". That's
8 that I've finished so far. I've been working on others
too...but I'm getting very tired and my thoughts are running
together. I'll probably sleep soon.

   posted by Bald Jason at 11:17 AM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]

I slept well today, after watching my extended cut of BSG
4x18 "Someone to Watch Over Me", which was awesome. I
woke once after having a nightmare that Michael Slaughter
was strangling me...and I heard noises that I thought were in
the condo but then nobody was here so I went back to sleep
where my dreams were more pleasant. After waking the 2nd
time I chatted a bit and read the news...then I watched
Caprica 1x03 "Reins of a Waterfall". I know where 2 of the
deleted scenes go in the episode...but there are 2 more
which need effects work...which I may not be able to do
because the backgrounds won't match up; perhaps I'll come
up with some sort of compromise to make the best out of
what I have. We'll see.

I jacked off for the first time in days and it was fantastic :) lol.
I really needed that. I hadn't showered in like 36 hours, which
is not like me at all, but that felt great too. I took my last
prilosec earlier. I need to eat soon, and may work on Caprica
after that...or read, or possibly just watch the next episode
so I can see what I have to work on next.

   posted by Bald Jason at 10:56 PM
   [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [Comments Welcome Here]